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Footballer “Shamed” by Faithful Relationship. 2
Fox100 4 years

A leading England footballer admitted his “shame” after being caught in a long-term, monogamous, faithful relationship by a tabloid newspaper this week. The star, who is attempting to remain...

Clarkson speeding offence incurs radical new penalty 0
Tom55 4 years

In a striking departure from normal sentencing after Jeremy Clarkson's latest speeding conviction, Judge Margot Fuller ordered that a 6 Berth Eldis Crusader caravan be attached to his Ferrari for 12...

Greece to fix economy by switching it off and back on again 2
Vertically Challenged Giant 4 years
Appointment of female IMF chief greeted with relief by New York hotel maids 1
roybland 4 years
BBC unveils new pre-vandalised Blue Peter garden 4
The Paper Ostrich 4 years

The BBC has unveiled a new-look, pre-vandalised Blue Peter garden ahead of the programme’s move to Salford next week. The BBC’s flagship children’s magazine programme is being relocated from...

Hundreds commit suicide after watching uplifting Eastenders episode 9
OllieP 4 years

BBC bosses have been forced to apologise this week as hundreds of viewers ended their lives after an uplifting episode of flagship soap Eastenders was broadcast, shattering the audience's belief that...

Rising cost of Prince Charles may push recovery off course 0
roybland 4 years
Chocoholics Anonymous welcomes Thorntons closures 0
roybland 4 years
Burglar stabbed in raid targeted bingo winner but got wrong housey-housey 0
roybland 4 years
Mathematicians call time on the "Piebald horse has 3.142 balls" joke 0
Tammy Flugh 4 years
Light-hearted, happy stories to dominate soaps this Christmas... 7
victory V 4 years

nah, just kidding...

Nadal fit to continue. Murray semi-final exit confirmed. 1
Christopher Frost 4 years
15 hours in a Glastonbury toilet would kill most people admits Eavis 0
Midfield Diamond 4 years
Demand grows for footballer Craig Thomson to live on benefits 0
Christopher Frost 4 years
Police dogs found dead in car ‘probably committed suicide’ say police 3
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Ancient manuscript proves King Cunt probably was. 2
wallster 4 years

A recently discovered copy of the Anglo Saxon Winchester Chronicle is shedding light on the life of a long forgotten Viking chieftan, King Cunt. The early 10th century warlord was methodically...

Cameron plans sympathy strike 0
Christopher Frost 4 years
Anyone want to develop this idea ? 2
Sinnick 4 years

Today, David Willetts sets out a White Paper on HE reform. So, maybe some Independent MP should set out a White Paper on Electoral reform, creating better competition, value for voters, parties...

BT customers learn of Newzbin's existence 0
Christopher Frost 4 years
800 pound gorilla told to go on a diet 0
Dumbnews 4 years

I am guessing this has been done before....

Double-decker buses demand apology for 'vile' comparison with deadly meteorite 1
4 years

London buses expressed outrage today, after being compared with a deadly meteorite. Meteor 2011MD only narrowly missed colliding with the Earth, and was described as 'bus-sized' in many newspapers....

Arrest fears cause Gaddafi to rethink holiday on Isle of Wight 4
4 years

Colonel Muammar Gaddafi, entrenched Libyan leader and fan of cream teas and fossil shops, has cancelled this year's holiday in Ventnor. The International Criminal Court issued an arrest warrant for...

Beer company executive discovers huge untapped market in the middle east 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Local Dispute Over Amount of Cigarettes Smoked Within Hourly Timespan 1
Dick Justice 4 years

ATHENS, GREECE - Controversy was sparked in a small, inconspicuous,, run-of-the-mill cafeteria near the Greek Parliament building in, Athens, when a local resident otherwise enjoying his afternoon...

Insurance hikes blamed on Max Mosley's whiplash claims 0
greg various 4 years
Play delayed as fault with centre court roof switches on automated sprinkler 0
Basil_B 4 years
Kids at Glastonbury allowed to bounce up and down on Beyonce castle. 3
Ludicity 4 years
Pyromaniacs Celebrate Supermarket Petrol Price War 1
Flatcap 4 years

Pyromaniacs all over Britain are celebrating as the big four supermarkets stepped up the petrol price war. “At anything up to £1.35 a litre, the cost of torching something as simple as a garden...

Dads rush to join glam mum school run 1
roybland 4 years

The number of dads walking their children to St Francis Xavier's RC Primary School in Hertford has rocketed since 'glam mum' Georgina 'goer' Lusted (22) joined the daily school run. 'Actually, no,'...

eating green wrapped Quality Street does NOT count as part of your 5-a-day 0
Leeboy007 4 years

warn nutritionists...