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Nancy Cameron is a little girl, not a description, sources reveal. 1
Thor 14.06.12 9:11am
medici2471
City built on Rock and Roll not structurally sound, say engineers 5
bonjonelson 14.06.12 8:52am
bonjonelson
Spurs pay out £3M compensation - Harry to get about £3M after tax

., (the first of many on the same lines?)...

2
Midfield Diamond 14.06.12 8:36am
Midfield Diamond
Government denies new surveillience law will be used...hold on...

..someone at the doorer, back in 15 years...

0
Al OPecia 14.06.12 6:55am
Al OPecia
Australian dingo now ‘most likely’ suspect in Maddie abduction, experts claim

A dingo dog, native to Australia, has emerged as the latest suspect in connection with the disappearance of Madeleine McCann from Portugal, according to reports . Detectives working on the McCann...

4
Gary Stanton 14.06.12 6:42am
Gary Stanton
DEFRA issue 'Stampede Alert' for Olympic Opening Ceremony 0
FlashArry 13.06.12 11:16pm
FlashArry
End of hosepipe ban stops dilution crisis for Homeopaths

Worried Homeopaths who have been forced to use 'dangerously low' levels of dilution are commending the decision to lift the hosepipe ban in areas of the UK. Many experts have recently voiced their...

1
charlies_hat 13.06.12 11:14pm
FlashArry
Teacher suspended for inspiring students to greatness

A teacher in South London has been suspended after pupils left a class with more knowledge than they went in with. The headteacher has condemned the poor judgement of the experienced member of the...

3
kga6 13.06.12 11:04pm
RickH
Danny Boyle admits inclusion of abattoir may have been a step to far

More to follow...

1
Julian 13.06.12 10:43pm
Danny
Danny Boyle Ha Ha Ha

More literary allusions soon...

1
Scroat 13.06.12 10:10pm
Duff
Bitch arrested for littering 0
Smart Alex 13.06.12 10:04pm
Smart Alex
Bender 'no substitute for Kuntz' says German manager 2
Haywood Manley 13.06.12 9:26pm
Haywood Manley
German Lars Bender emerges as school boys favourite Euro 2012 player 0
Mandy Lifeboat 13.06.12 8:55pm
Mandy Lifeboat
Ratings latest: Spain downgraded to Uganda 0
Mandy Lifeboat 13.06.12 8:54pm
Mandy Lifeboat
Euro 2012 commentator sacked for omissions

BBC television commentator Mark Smarm has been sacked for a series of shocking omissions in his first two matches at Euro 2012. In the first game between Poland and Greece, Smarm completely failed in...

1
weeb52 13.06.12 8:03pm
JohnA
Rural Policy to be outsourced to Minister's Gamekeeper. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 13.06.12 7:17pm
Al OPecia
The Ministry of Defence unveils Britain's new independent nuclear deterrent

Following recent spending cuts The Ministry of Defence unveils Britain's new independent nuclear deterrent: ...

1
greigewart 13.06.12 7:11pm
dvo4fun
Labour’s ‘progressive alliance’ founders after ELP walk out of talks

The Labour Party’s latest attempts to form a new ‘progressive alliance’ are close to collapse after both Greg Lake and Carl Palmer of Emerson Lake and Palmer walked out of negotiations...

10
Skylarking 13.06.12 5:43pm
Haywood Manley
Homeopathic forecaster predicts continued fine weather

Inspired by charlies_hat's earlier post...

0
Haywood Manley 13.06.12 5:17pm
Haywood Manley
Leveson and Hunt weary public demand recall of Parliament 0
medici2471 13.06.12 5:00pm
medici2471
Queen's knock out for Murray shocks girlfriend 0
nostra da mouse 13.06.12 4:56pm
nostra da mouse
Narnia requests bailout

The World economic crisis has reached new heights with the fictional country of Narnia requesting a loan from the ECB. The chairman of the Narnian Central Bank explained, "The problem is we don't...

7
apepper 13.06.12 4:54pm
Smart Alex
Suicidal dessert chef makes a fool of himself

.., .., .., inspired by dumbnews...

3
cinquecento 13.06.12 4:49pm
Thor
World’s leading chemists set for “ultimate test” as Tour de France approaches 0
grumblechops 13.06.12 4:28pm
grumblechops
Enigma machine breaks Ministerial Code 0
dvo4fun 13.06.12 4:09pm
dvo4fun
Grabriel "Delighted" As Prog Rock To Be Decriminalised

Lovers of the concept album and 20-minute epic rock song are said to be ecstatic today, as new legislation that will see controversial music genre Progressive Rock decriminalised is to be rushed...

18
Duff 13.06.12 4:07pm
dvo4fun
Salmond's bank account hacked by Observer in bid to prove Scotsman are tight.

More racial sterotypes the noo...

0
MADJEZ 13.06.12 3:36pm
MADJEZ
Foot and Mouth a very real threat to Olympic opening ceremony admits Boyle 0
simonjmr 13.06.12 12:43pm
simonjmr
Cheryl Slams WAGs Class Of 2012

Pasty-munching princess of pop and nation's sweetheart, Cheryl Cole, has averted her judgly gaze from third-rate karaoke acts, and has now turned it on the England football team's current crop of...

2
Duff 13.06.12 11:50am
Duff
Camerons make U-turn and return daughter to the pub

David Cameron is today defending his decision to take his daughter Nancy back to the pub where she was accidentally left at the weekend. 'I know Ed Miliband is going to say this yet another a U-turn'...

1
ianslat 13.06.12 10:47am
tedweasel