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Hate me! Hate me again! says Nick Clegg, pissing on the Cenotaph 11
FraserWords 4 years

Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg today threw several impoverished students, a cute puppy dog and Sir Bruce Forsyth onto a blazing bonfire of the lovely frocks of a naked, shivering Duchess of...

Celebrities criticised for failing to make trite comments about Amy Winehouse 2
FraserWords 4 years

Dozens of celebrities faced mounting criticism today for failing to make trite comments about Amy Winehouse via various social networks., “It’s almost as if they think their opinions don’t...

Frank Miller detained at airport after his gonads set off metal detectors. 5
Corrigan 4 years

In an ironic twist of fate, given he is about to release an anti-al Qaeda/Islamist graphic novel , comic book author Frank Miller was detained by airport security yesterday after his testicles set...

Google stumbles on unique revenue generating model of charging users 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Mobiles Show Us The Light 0
victimms 4 years

The world renowned Psychic Derek Acorah has struck a deal with Apple. He plans to release his own range of mobile phones. The I’m-Dead will now enable you to speak to, not only your living...

Pipe Smoker of the Year 2011 to be awarded posthumously. More soon. 5
dominic_mcg 4 years
Flightless, South American bird wins "rhea of the year" award. More soon. 4
dominic_mcg 4 years
Queen says factory visit was 'shit' 12
theboot 4 years

Officials at Buckingham Palace are remaining tight-lipped following the Queen's visit to a newly opened, chemical engineering plant in the West Midlands today., Staff at Prentice Chemicals in...

Sky divers bemoan low fish stocks 0
Dick Everyman 4 years
Tongue-slip sees Nicky Campbell pull out of Jo Brand's 'Big Fact Hunt' 9
f0zz 4 years

I'm so sorry...

Nitrous Oxide released in school assembly - "not funny" says headmaster 0
Dick Everyman 4 years
Newly converted vegetarian receives a standing pescetarian 0
simonjmr 4 years
Giles Coren may not inherit his father’s humour empire. 19
nickb 4 years

As News International slides deeper and deeper into crisis, it emerged that Giles Coren may not inherit his father Alan’s powerful humour empire. The late Alan Coren is fondly remembered for his...

Police pull over Amy Winehouse bandwagon for overcrowding. 0
MADJEZ 4 years
Parliament Recalled To Debate All The Rest Of It. 1
Drylaw 4 years

The PM began proceedings in the conventional manner:"Mr Speaker I have had meetings this morning and later I will be having more and all the rest of it.", Speaker called Mr Ed Miliband who said:"Can...

Council wants to put me in a prefab - I said "no,no,no" 0
Dick Everyman 4 years
Israeli orchestra’s Wagner concert starts tit-for-tat reconciliation war 0
Qoxiivi 4 years

The Israeli chamber orchestra has struck a telling blow in what experts fear could turn into a never-ending war of contrition between Israel and its historical enemies. Roberto Paternostro’s...

US to appoint Paul "When numbers get serious" Simon to manage debt crisis 0
simonjmr 4 years
"Amy's gone but I wish it'd been Fearne Cotton" 0
simonjmr 4 years

To paraphrase Neil Young More soon...

Libertarian groups say Google Mind Peek® is a step too far. 1
Corrigan 4 years

A consortium of civil liberties organisations has attacked the introduction of the new software application Google Mind Peek. After download, the device allows internet users to view a visual...

Amy Winehouse tribute album to be called "Back to Blue" 0
Iamthestig 4 years

Available through stiff records...

Scouts take over from British army in Helmand 1
Vertically Challenged Giant 4 years

British forces in Afghanistan have successfully handed over control of security in Helmand Province to the 1st Lashkar Gah scouts group. This followed weeks when scouts holding the Hiker badge have...

Justin Bieber not 27 for another 10 years 2
iRonA 4 years
Rebecca Black has nervous breakdown in empty train carriage 0
Oxbridge 4 years
Original Sin repealed as Garden of Eden apple revealed to have been Chinese fake 0
pere floza 4 years

. pax vobiscum...

Britons disgusted by Gross National Product. 1
nickb 4 years
Cheated-on wife performs full sex-change op on sleeping husband 17
Golgo13 4 years

'Just chopping his cock off was too good for him', seethed Cheng Chun-mei, wife of play-away husband Shui-bian, as reporters gathered to see her being led away from court in Chubei, Hsinchu county,...

Virgin Trains launches Inflatable Buddies service 10
Dick Everyman 4 years

Virgin Trains has launched a new service for commuters on the West Coast line. ‘Inflatable Buddies’ has been developed in response to passenger’s requests for ‘someone nice to sit next...

UN Passes Resolution To Abolish Lengthy National Anthems By 2023 6
Textbook 4 years

No article coming, just a tagline :)...

Rupert Murdoch to star as Young Mr Grace in film version of Are YOu Being Served 2
ronseal 4 years

Rupert Murdoch's performance as a genial octagenarian proprietor, who turns up once a month to tel them they're all doing very well, has won him the coveted part of Young Mr Grace in the new movie...