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Royal Mail to sell rubber band breeding farm 7
Mrblacker 3 years

As part of efforts to generate income and cut costs, the Royal Mail's confirmed it's to sell the rubber band breeding farm it runs in Suffolk. It was founded in 1926 to supply the then GPO with a...

History Professor Says, "Thank Goodness For The Anglo-Saxon Invasion........ 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

..because sheep-shagging just isn't a nice hobby to pursue."...

Royal wedding excuses being auctioned on eBay... 0
Doylem 3 years

The invitations have all been sent out. So minor royals, politicians, foreign heads of state, footballers, celebrities and old school-friends of William and Kate are busy looking at their social...

Cameron Wins Award - Top Amongst Other Leaders 1
Jesse Bigg 3 years

Tory leader, Dave Cameron, won an award yesterday; voted the winner, by a wide margin, in the 'Pretend To Be Nice, Kind and Sincere' category...

Arab world demands rights of full and open democracy 8
greg various 3 years

for ALL Muslim men...

Reading test for six-year-olds to inclupe nane worbs. 6
malgor 3 years

A number of made-up words such as "knoob" and "cunut" are to be included in the government's planned new reading test for six-year-olds in Englang. Non-words are being included to check that...

Self-centred chocolatier owns up to strawberry crème addiction. More soon. 2
malgor 3 years
Sarah Palin chastised for not having read 'Atlas Shrugged' 0
Grover 3 years

Following from his recent rebuke of Sarah Palin for declining to attend the Conservative Unionist and Nationalist Triannual Symposium (CUNTS), former senator Rick Santorum has publicly criticised the...

Fears grow for safety of Muppet Drummer 'Animal' in Bahrain's capital 0
pinxit 3 years

Manama? Naah!...

‘ UK cartoon characters face life on benefits’ claims Clifton 1
Gerontius 3 years

Claims made by several leading cartoon characters that they are gradually being replaced at the BBC with less experienced actors from Eastern Europe have been dismissed by Kay Benbow, the current...

Gaddafi admits he cheated in science exam on the periodic table... 0
dominic_mcg 3 years

by wearing it on his uniform.

Heavy traffic on M1 delays start of convention of high-speed rail opponents 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Rolls Royce admits only super-rich could afford electricity for its electric car 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
BBC vigorously denies ‘Eastenders’ uses real actors 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
New training regime for Fernando Torres: traffic cones, cow’s arse, banjo... 0
Doylem 3 years
Big Society Plan Revealed. 0
arthurminnit 3 years

In a shock revelation leaked from Downing Street this morning, David Camerons plans for the "Big Society", his much vaunted scheme to get Britain moving again without the unwieldy bureaucracy that...

Inept criminal supported by ‘Witless Protection Scheme’... 2
Doylem 3 years
Lab mouse with ear grown on his back now forgotten and in his twilight years 0
3 years

finds difficulty in keeping his glasses on...

Sun-tanned physicist discovers dark matter 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Crewe residents congregate in square to demand an end to democracy... 2
Doylem 3 years

Bob Andrews spoke for the majority of Crewe residents who, brandishing pitchforks and flaming torches, were massing in the town square. “Voting isn’t all it’s cracked up to be”, said Bob....

RE test for Primary School children to include non-religions 0
Sinnick 3 years
Berkshire children to undergo revised test on Reading 0
Sinnick 3 years
Medical accountant baffled why no responds to his invoices for Viagra 0
Dumbnews 3 years
“Embrace fanaticism”, church-goers urged. “Death to the unbelievers”... 0
Doylem 3 years

“There’s a lot that the Church of England can learn from other religions”, said Rowan Williams, choosing his words with care. “Not about their actual beliefs - they’re bollocks, obviously -...

Bahrain demonstrators adamant it's a roundabout 0
greg various 3 years

"No, it's a bloody square," insist police...

ConDem Cabinet consists of "Made-up Politicians". More soon. 2
FormerlyAlOPecia 3 years
Meaningless concepts to feature in primary school tests... 0
Doylem 3 years

To gauge children’s reading skills, nonsense words are to be included in tests for six-year-olds. Brian Shuttleworth, a spokesman for the Department of Education, hailed this new initiative....

Crisis in East as demonstrations spread to third Norfolk village 1
Des Custard 3 years

After the mass protests of recent weeks which successfully liberated the villages of Acle and Reepham from the tyrannical rule of Norfolk Young Farmers, East Anglia’s media were on tenterhooks...

Protests against Norfolk Young Farmers spread to a third village 6
Des Custard 3 years

After the collapse of long-standing branches of Norfolk Young Farmers in Acle and Reepham in recent weeks, East Anglia’s media were on tenterhooks yesterday as the occupation of Attleborough’s...

Sponge Bob criticized for being too self-absorbed 9
Dumbnews 3 years