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Judge recommends criminal who posed as yoga tutor is put away for a long stretch 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Landing delayed by loss of Airbus A380 engine 1
wwwiz 3 years

"If we lose all four engines, we'll be up here forever," passenger complains...

Auto Insurance companies "desperate for customers". More adverts soon. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 3 years
New "patch" eagerly awaited to correct iPhone iOverslept Ap 0
hero2zero 3 years

Availability to be announced...

Fetish Channel launches Strictly Cum Dancing 0
Scroat 3 years
'Clueless' Apprentice contestant confuses Alan Sugar with Richard Branson 1
dicky37 3 years

Lord Sugar was said to be 'fuming' last night after the media-savvy, bearded, self-made millionaire British entrepreneur was mistaken for media-savvy, bearded self-made British millionaire...

Islamic Cleric defends youtube footage that inspired MP stabbing by saying 4
Basil_B 3 years

'I thought the Government were looking for a cut in MP's'...

Supermarket Wars: Sainsbury’s claim Tesco stockpiling weapons grade plutonium 2
brownpaperreporter 3 years

In the latest twist in this dangerous saga, Sainsbury’s have called for UN Weapons Inspectors to be given access to Tesco distribution centres. While Tesco freely admit to possessing low grade...

Cabinet Members Grounded after Cable Fault 2
De-scribe 3 years

The entire Lib-Dem element of the coalition cabinet has been grounded after Business Secretary Vince Cable exploded in mid-speech last night. Witnesses reported a “loud bang” during the speech,...

Al-Qaeda finally claims responsibility for failed gunpowder plot of 1605 1
dicky37 3 years

A plan to blow up the Houses of Parliament and assassinate King James I was revealed to be the work of an embryonic terrorist group that later became al-Qaeda, a senior Islamic scholar claimed last...

Tabloids schedule destruction of Gareth Bale for mid-March 4
Oxbridge 3 years

Representatives of the UK tabloid press, meeting at a top secret destination code-named 'The King's Arms' in Central London, have provisionally agreed the division of rights over the next three...

White Van Man victim of evolutionary adaptation 1
SteveCut 3 years

Drivers of white vans tend to have a poor reputation as aggressive and inconsiderate drivers. However, a report published today by the University of Birmingham's Centre for Evolutionary Biology...

"invisibility cloak" a step closer, no-one notices. 2
Erlang 3 years

Physicists have hailed the approach a "huge step forward", but are bitter that no-one has made any comment and therefore have been forced into making a press release. We made the breakthrough some...

Lib Dems pledge not to increase intuition fees 2
fernandomando 3 years

Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has reiterated his party’s insistence that there will be no increase in intuition fees for students, after considerable criticism of his party’s compromised...

Geldoff denies Live Aid was originally to be called 'Live Ammo' 1
kpseymour 3 years
Qantas survivor - "I'm just glad not to be in Australia" 2
MrChigleysAunt 3 years
MP's visit to prison causes fears they may corrupt inmates 0
A Crooked MP 3 years

A second night of rioting has taken place at a young offenders institute in Yorkshire. Inmates were horrified to learn that they now had to contend with visits from MP's canvassing for their vote....

Royal College of Organists delighted at record transplant levels 0
crlncxn 3 years

A record 7 organ transplants took place in the UK last year, an increase of 53.2% on the previous 12 months. But Nigel Ogden, presenter of BBC’s ‘The Organist Entertains’ said there was still...

If a people carrier is a people carrier... 0
Frank Prenesti 3 years

what does that now make a car?...

New pilots recruited from Ryan Air blamed for grounding Qantas jumbos 0
Basil_B 3 years

after forgetting to let the wheels down on landing...

Undertakers express grave concern for spending cuts in the UK. 0
Basil_B 3 years
Fry trying to get straight 1
4ty2 3 years

from his ediction to publigh himself. Following his recent commments on female sex trying to promote kerb crawling for women he felt he had got the wroong end of the stick and tried to become a more...

Tuition fees fear may force gap year students to miss out Sydney altogether 2
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Stephen Fry claims to be misunderstood by the media 0
4ty2 3 years

His comment about women failing to go cottaging was meant to address the failure of modern housewives to stay at home and help restarting the economy by cottage industry aproach. He thought it to be...

Rise in dogshit-on-shoe incidents blamed on increase in SMS texting 0
bonjonelson 3 years

[More soon]...

Paul Gascoigne trial called off as his Rt Hon council Sir James Belly the 5th QC 0
arrghgarry 3 years

exits court for a pint of port...

Belgians vote for 'let's just forget it party' 4
acwanaut 3 years

After 150 days where no Politicians could agree to form a governing coalition, Belgians have voted to just forget it and give up. In a landmark piece of legislation, drafted by the tea lady that...

Organisers of Titanic 02 exhibition announce follow-up Lib Dem exhibition 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Tube system back to normal means a day of unavoidable misery for millions 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Badgers express concern at threat from rising UK human TB rate 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years