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Consumers warned not all classical music charts have Go Compare singer at no. 1 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Museums Council no longer to be axed but put on display for future generations 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Window salesmen disguise themselves as anarchists to drum up business 0
Basil_B 3 years
Chopin music to be used in supermarkets 4
simonjmr 3 years
Anarchists threaten royal wedding - William Hague is organising it 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

Anarchists have infiltrated the royal wedding by getting William Hague to organise it, it emerged today., A spokesperson for the anarchists, Ann R Kist, said: 'What a result! This is the perfect way...

Earth hour scuppered by Ant & Dec's Push the Button 0
simonjmr 3 years
Rhino poaching problems solved with innovative hoof-friendly saucepan handle 0
QorbeQ 3 years
Underground replacement bus service 'an authentic and winning experience'. 6
SingingHinny 3 years

The Newcastle Metro operator nexus has been roundly congratulated by regular passengers for providing ‘a seamless transition to the metro replacement service’ and for ensuring that passengers...

Short Frenchman conquers hot wife, "now for middle east" - extended 12" remix 6
NewSuburbanDad 3 years

A short Frenchman, fresh from the conquest of a hot Italian wife, has gone on to campaign in the middle east this weekend.  'It eez true' said the General. ' Last time I watched ze British with...

Gaddafi vows to press on with deficit reduction 0
NewSuburbanDad 3 years

Colonel Gaddafi confirmed last night that reducing Libya's budget deficit remained his top priority, and that "nothing, not even the Zionist Crusaders" would stop him moving into fiscal surplus in...

Prof. Brian Cox’s testicles account for 77% of matter in the observable Universe 5
Manifestations of Baboonery 3 years

Prof. Brian Cox’s testicles account for 77% of matter in the observable Universe, a leading scientist claims STARTLING claims that the scrotum of Brian Cox, keyboard player for Labour’s in-house...

TV news: 'My big, fat, gypsy tart' condemned by Guardian for stereotyping... 0
be reasonable 3 years

before being broadcast on the cookery channel. More cakes soon...

Woman awarded Military Cross complains she has nothing to go with it 2
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Gentleman's Relish supplies now 'critical' after Fortnum and Mason attack. 5
the coarse whisperer 3 years

World markets were sent reeling today with the news that rebel insurgents have seized the main condiments and clothing producing area of London, St James. In the latest move of what commentators are...

Manchester 'lippy kids' follow Elbow's advice and build rocket 0
Bravenewmalden 3 years

A group of youths from a Moss Side housing estate have made history by building a working rocket after one of them heard Elbow's stirring paean to the country's disaffected young. "It came on the...

Cat found dead in box - RSPCA looking for a Mr Schrödinger 0
OldThingy 3 years

No more meow...

Ofcom bans Channel 5 from making programmes whose title start with "My big fat". 1
dominic_mcg 3 years

More big fat oneliners soon...

Will’s widow loses Wills Will and will will Wills loss more 0
OldThingy 3 years
Met police admits 'errors' in botched search for missing hour. more soon 0
Mrblacker 3 years
Two royal wedding cakes ordered after Prescott accepts invitation 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Protestors welcome plans for cuts in police numbers 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Travel delays after trains take over from replacement bus services 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
NATO call for regime change after popular uprising in London. 0
MADJEZ 3 years

Troops to protect protesters from Cameron's brutal police.

TUC promise more marches to aid beleaguered shop frontage industry. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
University Of Tripoli wins boat-race for 17th year running... 0
be reasonable 3 years

according to a press release from the Office of Colonel Gaddaffi., Hat-tip to Mr. Nelson...

Nottingham Trent surprise winner of The Boat Race 2
bonjonelson 3 years

[more soon]...

Elephant hoping people in the room will just go away. 1
the coarse whisperer 3 years
Big fat gypsy calls off wedding after Channel 4 taunts about his weight 0
ronseal 3 years

A gravitationally challenged gypsy whose wedding was to be screened by Channel 4 has cancelled after taunts about his weight were included in the title of the documentary...

Big fat gypsy honeymoon is over says retailer 0
QorbeQ 3 years

The honeymoon period for sales of outrageous clothing following the runaway success of My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding has ended, according to leading high street tat merchant Primark. Marketing manager...

Police to contract out Scene of Crime investigations to Time Team. 4
Ian Searle 3 years