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Metropolitan Police to introduce automated bomb threat phoneline 1
3 years

A spokesman for the Metropolitan police announced the introduction of a dedicated, automated bomb alert phoneline today. The phoneline, which will be an 0845 number, should be introduced by the end...

French IMF Chief Learns What It's Like to Share Room with Randy Naked Man... 1
wolfie 3 years

with Big Ron from G Block...

Obama to continue tease of al Qaeda over photos of bin Laden corpse 0
roybland 3 years

Barack Obama’s tease of al Qaeda and the Taliban over the release of photographs of Osama bin Laden’s corpse is to continue. ‘The President is quite enjoying winding al Qaeda up over the...

Village side awarded franchise for next season's IPL 0
Mrblacker 3 years

The prospect of international cricket's got the small Hampshire village of Appleshaw buzzing with excitement. The village's cricket team's been awarded a surprise entry into next season's Indian...

Student receives Victoria cross for act of bravery during call of duty-black ops 0
Iamthestig 3 years
Ryanair to sue Swiss over 'suicide tourism' patent 0
roybland 3 years
FIFA denies corruption claims as Blatter guaranteed relection on 1st June 2011 0
simonjmr 3 years
Call to teach 'kiss of life' in schools welcomed by creepy chemistry teacher 0
roybland 3 years

A call by the British Heart Foundation for the government to Include the 'kiss of life' in the national curriculum, has been welcomed with open arms and a leer by oily secondary school chemistry...

Germans finally admit to making words up after Unternasalbeard enters dictionary 0
simonjmr 3 years
German wins best moustache prize 0
roybland 3 years

A German house painter has been awarded the title of the world's best moustache at the World Beard and Moustache Championship in Trondheim, Norway. Adolf Hitler won the title against stiff...

First balanced iPhone 4 review: The new iPhone is excellent 4
gaijintendo 3 years

but on the other hand...

ICC investigators keen to question Gaddafi over disputed LBW call. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Royal College of caterers called in to diffuse rogue chocolate bombe 0
simonjmr 3 years
Igloos can give you cancer, claims The Nunavut Mail 0
bonjonelson 3 years
Status Quo may celebrate life time acheivement award by learning a fifth chord 0
gregle 3 years

Francis Rossi says he heard that by putting your little finger on as well you can play something called a "seventh" but seeing as four chords have been enough to get them through their musical career...

Chambermaid feared the wrath of Strauss-Khan 1
simonjmr 3 years
Ball passes between sticks. Some men very happy. Some not. 5
be reasonable 3 years

More pointless drivel next season...

Man rotavating his garden at weekend too busy to post on Newsbiscuit 0
Screenie 3 years

More eventually...

Celebrated modern artist admits he’s ‘mostly just arseing about now’ 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Renowned artist Aaron Gillespie has shocked the art world with the admission that he lost interest in his work some time ago and isn’t even trying any more. In an interview with Art Monthly...

Magnitude 8.5 Quake Strikes Gehry Buildings 3
Q William Bacon 3 years An earthquake measuring 8.5 on the Richter Scale has struck 62 buildings located throughout the world. The buildings were designed by...

West Ham to name next former manager in 3 weeks' time. more soon 0
Mrblacker 3 years
Have you been injured while at work ? You're probably Neil Lennon. 1
MADJEZ 3 years
Flotsama Bin Laden or Jetsama Bin Laden? 2
Ironduke 3 years

its a fine point, but an important one...

Elysse Palace release pictures of Sarkozky watching real-time video feed 0
nw35th 3 years

The French Government released today a photo of President Sarkozy and his aides in their 'salle du situation' watching a real-time video feed from the elite 'hit team' sent to the Sofitel hotel in...

IMF Chief claims he was only engaging in "quantitative easing". More soon. 4
Al OPecia 3 years
Barack Obama's Black Half Finally Overwhelms Him 5
Q William Bacon 3 years

During a tedious press conference during which President Obama repeatedly explained the financial estimates that would allow entitlement programs to remain funded while not exceeding the interim debt...

IMF chief was 'just planking' on chambermaid 1
roybland 3 years
God Comes Out As Gay 7
Q William Bacon 3 years

Who made the beauty of the sunset?, Who made the song of the bird?, Who made the many flowers?, Who made their many colors and perfumes?, Who made the cute little animals?, Who made the poofy...

Vicky Huhne re-releases country classic, You Picked a Fine Time to Leave Me.. 0
ronseal 3 years

Lib Dem loudmouth Chris Huhne is the subject of a new song released by his ex-wife to celebrate their relationship., Vicky Pryce (ne Huhne) has chosen to release her own version of the Kenny Rogers...

Sting tells Roxanne, "You don't have to post on the Internet" 0
Dumbnews 3 years