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‘I didn’t get where I am today,’ teleportation machine inventor admits. 3
malgor 3 years
HMV to rebrand CDs as novelty beer mats... 3
Doylem 3 years
"Don't pray for rain to avoid test match defeat" urge Queenslanders. 0
riesler 3 years
Breast implants lead to higher risk of pregnancy say researchers 4
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Nokia taps the Silver Surfer age group with the launch of the Nandroid phone 6
brownpaperreporter 3 years

Featuring an indestructible, dribble resistant casing with permanently attached strap, the buttons are extra large and run from A-Z rather than a QWERTY keyboard. The quietest setting is 85 decibels...

infidel muslim clerics demand stronger blast-for-me legislation in Pakistan 0
4ty2 3 years

to show that the propagation of the holy word by the blast is more powerful than the failed propagation of the bible by the sword., The Pakistani government is trying to combat religious tensions by...

Bristol Police: “We’re disappointed. The garlic bread didn’t turn up either”... 0
Doylem 3 years
In the hunt for the missing sock police arrest several tumble driers. 1
Ian Searle 3 years
HMV launches '3 stores for the price of 2' offer 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
7/7 firefighter jailed. 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years

He thought that two of his drug mules were on the bus, police reveal...

Deadly virus of 'builder's bum' disease spreading 0
Trickster 3 years

butt cheeks everywhere...

Bristol police baffled by 2-for-1 pizza deal... 1
Doylem 3 years
Rioters who came face to face with Camilla urged to seek medical advice 0
Gary Stanton 3 years

Police last night urgently requested that the yobs who stared Camilla directly in the eye should contact them immediately as they may require urgent medical attention. Releasing photographs of the...

First pizzas now ski socks police admit murder hunt now an episode of Seinfeld. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Bristol police suspect whoever employs Max Clifford, did it 0
simonjmr 3 years
Gas Safe accreditation for porn film plumbers... 4
Doylem 3 years

Jeff Ogilvy, Head of Mildly Patronising Safety Advice at RoSPA, voices his concerns. “A woman, no matter how skimpily dressed, should ask for a plumber’s ID before letting him through the door....

Cameron to tackle rubbish crisis by tactical deployment of Wombles 0
Ludicity 3 years

Prime Minister David Cameron has announced that he will deal with ‘Rubbish Mountains’ that have piled up in regions of Britain by sending in teams of Wombles to clear up the mess. ‘The Wombles...

Eccentric loner community shuns Jeffries for being too plausible. 0
the coarse whisperer 3 years

A motion at this year's AGM of the Bristol chapter of Creepy Weirdos voted today to rescind Christopher Jeffries oddball status due to his unsuccessful attempt to get himself arrested for a murder he...

Police sent to John Lewis for politeness lessons and McDonalds's for crabbiness 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Chinese men set record for standing in ice, but fail to get cold weather payment 0
Ian Searle 3 years
EU Rules in Favour of Metric Leather Soap 2
thisisall1word 3 years
Jeffrey Archer eaten alive by mutant dogs... 3
Doylem 3 years

Not strictly true, but we all need something to cheer us at this dark and dreary time of the year...

England’s lead over Australia nears biblical proportions 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Nigel Pargetter's death was second choice, admit Archers scriptwriters. 1
Tammy Flugh 3 years

Scriptwriters today revealed that Helen's baby was to die from cot death, and would have been swapped for another newborn child., "Those Eastenders bastards beat us to it", a spokesman stated, "and...

Undertakers are recession proof, as more people are dying for their vacancies 0
simonjmr 3 years
Looking for big-name signing, Blackburn buy Jan Venegoor of Hesselink... 4
Doylem 3 years
After brief visit home with son,man dissapointingly 4
Malcum eggs 3 years

finds unlevel playing fields decides to return to stomping ground...

Dogged Determination Wins Out 7
maxshreck 3 years

Just five days after winning the competition, The Apprentice 2010 winner Stella English has been disqualified. Following a series of background checks, it emerged that the mother of two has...

Captain Kirk relieved of Starship Enterprise command afterCCTV footage broadcast 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
News of NI water chief’s resignation leaks to the press 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years