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Gvt. to create extra university places for poor by allowing rich to buy degrees 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Annoying smug insurance company advert creates vicious backlash against Meerkats 1
ronseal 3 years

A one joke advertising campaign for a shitty insurance broker could see the entire Meerkat population wiped out in an angry public backlash. MORE SOON...

New anti-virus program simply reinstalls windows every two weeks 2
Dumbnews 3 years
Ed Moribund takes out super injunction to stop spread of rumours... 0
be reasonable 3 years

alleging that he is 'Leader of the Opposition', 'competent' and a 'bit of a twat'. More soon...

Man's best friend now an animal shaped household product 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Sarah Palin: "Bristols exposure won't hurt my candidacy prospects." 0
charlieworth 3 years

U.S. Presidential aspirant Sarah Palin offered a cautious welcome to the news that her daughter Bristol had signed a deal to appear in a 'reveal-all' American 'reality' show. Speaking at a press...

Seve's funeral marred as fans keep shouting 'get in the hole'. 12
exigo 3 years
Critics cast doubt on 'charges by post' plan 1
Mrblacker 3 years

The Government's plans to issue charge notices to minor offenders by post are under fire from critics of the Royal Mail. The Home Secretary Theresa May announced the proposal as part of plans to cut...

Nick Clegg admits responsibility for everything. 0
deskpilot3 3 years

Fukushima, Stoke City, Big Brother, Sunny Delight, Builder's Bum, Danny Alexander's farting, the Crimean War, Global Warming, the Austin Allegro, Horne and Corden, Pot Noodle, Cancer, Chavs, Price...

Nick Clegg seeks superinjunction against seller of doormats with his face on... 0
deskpilot3 3 years
Nick Clegg aims to join successful team - makes overtures to Alex Ferguson... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

Or would he just score more own goals?...

***** granted ***** by the ***** in ****** today. 1
bonjonelson 3 years

As has been widely reported ******, ***** ******, who is a professional ********, has successfully applied for a ********* at the ********* in *******. His ******* said today it was a ******** for...

Nil-by-mouth patient granted supper injection 2
3 years
LOCOG to use AV for Olympic tickets ballot 1
Mrblacker 3 years

People who have requested tickets for Olympic events that are over-subscribed, will have fresh tickets allocated to them using the alternative vote system, the London Organising Committee for the...

Rio Ferdinand demands next stalker not to look like a man in drag 0
simonjmr 3 years
Clarkson denies being 'on that bombshell'. 2
MADJEZ 3 years
New US show Guantanamo Baywatch criticised for simulating drowning 5
Qoxiivi 3 years

The pilot for new body-boarding-meets-water-boarding show, Guantanamo Baywatch, has been roundly slammed for a number of simulated drowning scenes in its opening episode. Created to show the lighter...

Rio Ferdinand stalker found to be 'just a really zealous defender'... 0
be reasonable 3 years
Marvel Admits New "Thor" Motion Picture Their First Bid at Weather Control 0
bannedlibrary 3 years

Marvel Studios, maker of such hit films as "Iron Man" and "Iron Man 2," have admitted to press officials this week that their new "Thor" movie was their first bid at controlling the global climate. ...

Banks apologize for failure to pull-off £6billion insurance scam 0
roybland 3 years

Britain's banks have expressed their regret that they failed to rip-off three million customers who were mis-sold payment protection insurance.,  , 'We admit we're not perfect', a spokesman for...

British Gas: bills could go up. 0
be reasonable 3 years

More news: Nick Clegg not very popular, sources reveal...

Farmers welcome lack of rain as opportunity to have a good whinge 0
roybland 3 years

Britain's farmers have welcomed the lack of rainfall as a heaven sent opportunity to have a prolonged whinge.,  , 'It's just what we need', said Joe Hartley, a farmer for thirty-years. 'What with...

Well Known Supernatural Being and Carpenters Wife Take Out Superinjuction 0
thisisall1word 3 years
Really Great Pub on Crossroads No longer Able To Advertise 0
thisisall1word 3 years

(5, 10), etc...

Escort stuck a ***** up Mr *******'s ****, nation speculates 0
3 years
Isle of Wight man reveals secret double-life as a lollypop attendant 0
antharrison 3 years

Cyril Evans, a 67 year old retired local government officer, has shocked his family and friends by revealing that in addition to being the honary treasurer of Ventnor bowls club, he has led a secret...

'Good Housekeeping' attack on Bin Laden wives 3
roybland 3 years

Osama Bin Laden's wives are strongly criticized in this month's 'Good Housekeeping' magazine for their poor housekeeping skills.,  , 'The lounge where he watched the television was a complete...

All Channel four's current programming to be replaced with a single series 0
Screenie 3 years

The new series, which will run continuously for 24 hours apart from the 20 hours of adverts, is called: I'm an X factory worker but now I'm a celebrity, there's one born every minute but I'm a...

Dr Who Fans to Go to Samoa for Time Travel 0
Dun Dunkin 3 years
Beckham has late meal in Clapham... 2
be reasonable 3 years

due to supper in junction misunderstanding...