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All war and conflict ends at Pope's insistence 9
dogwheels 3 years

New York - The UN has confirmed that all war, conflict and diplomatic stand-offs in the world have ended at the request of Pope Benedict. The Pontiff made the demand during his Christmas address,...

Christmas Dinner addicts go 'cold turkey'. 2
Trickster 3 years

Millions of people addicted to Christmas dinner leftovers have gone cold turkey, according to recovery group, 12 Steps of Christmas., One anonymous stuffing addict said. "The 12 steps programme has...

Tesco sees the return of Jesus as a threat to their Food and Beverage margins. 1
melody 3 years
Vince Cable praised for his skill, control and passion... 2
victory V 3 years

shame he was only dancing...

Jesus accused of using ghost writers in Xmas cash in book The Bible 2
ronseal 3 years

Jesus is the least celeb accused of using ghost writers to produce his first blockbuster novel., New allegations have been made that Jesus's best selling book The Bible was not actually written by...

Airports to fine government for snow blocked roads. 1
LaserComet 3 years
Counterfeit gold trader found gilty 1
riesler 3 years
75% of practising Catholics want to see the Pope and Justin Bieber get it on 1
Malcum eggs 3 years
Veggie addicts go cold tofu. 3
Trickster 3 years
Wombles' Creator, Elisabeth Beresford, Moves From Overground To Underground 2
IABP 3 years
Shortage of 'Bah Humbugs' relieved. Plentiful supply found in Home Counties. 0
DiY 3 years
Only nine months until Christmas advertising begins... 0
victory V 3 years

More (all too) soon...

Family sectioned after admitting they find Will ferrell funny. 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
Vince Cable shocked to discover Murdoch is his 'secret santa' 2
surdoux 3 years
Queen makes festive pitch for England job 0
allmyownstunts 3 years
Brian Hanrahan latest: God counted him out and he counted him in again 3
ronseal 3 years

. Apologies to Gerontious for the one liner...

Rerun of On the Buses starts Boxing Day 2
Bismarck 3 years
World's oldest advertising slogan uncovered, "If anyone can, Ghengis Khan" 1
bonjonelson 3 years

Merry xmas...

Elderly gentleman dressed in red suit arrested in child's bedroom in Ipswich. 0
dogwheels 3 years
e-bay mainframe crashes after 'poor year' for present givers this xmas. 0
dogwheels 3 years
Occupants of Clarence house confirm " It`s wonderful life" was based on them. 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
Cable confident "Strictly Come Dancing" will now make people take him seriously 4
MC One R 3 years
Eastwood to star in film about duck who wins Le Mans 24 Hour Rally. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 3 years

As a racing hydrophobic Clint...

Ad Agency sacked over 'understandable' perfume advert 2
Mrblacker 3 years

The world of advertising's coming to terms with the dismissal of leading agency Ardaby Wanklyn Chilvers after they produced what's described as 'the most understandable perfume advert ever'. Their...

Celebrities save Africa again through 'Face to Feet' unwanted skin scheme. 3
SingingHinny 3 years

Following Madonna’s rehousing scheme, American celebrities have once again leapt to the aid of third world children, after several leading names pledged to send their excess and unwanted skin to...

North Korea opens fire on Santa after he crosses 1mm of their air space. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Pope Phiddie Kiddler dismayed to be introduced by James Naughtie. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 3 years
Iran 'surprised and delighted' Saudi is their secret satan. 0
the coarse whisperer 3 years
Jesus admits when he comes back it could cause a bit of a logistical nightmare 8
Malcum eggs 3 years
Revolutionary Queens speech 0
Bismarck 3 years

In a revolutionary speech tomorrow, the Queen will translate the Popes message from the original German. 'We couldn't think of a better person to do it' said a Vatican spokesman...