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Andy Coulson briefs Cabinet on Top Cop, Barmy Boffins, Randy Vicar and Scorchers

A new dossier written by the government's former spin doctor has graphically depicted, in no uncertain terms, the challenges that lie ahead of the Prime Minister and his cabinet. The report -...

0
ronseal 31.05.13 10:38pm
ronseal
Brazilian's cut it a bit fine, say fifa. 0
Squudge 31.05.13 10:32pm
Squudge
Guardsmen out of step change their drill sergeant 0
Arthur 31.05.13 10:22pm
Arthur
Sochi winter games mocked for derisory levels of corruption

Claims that a mere $30bn has been stolen so far in connection with preparations for the Sochi Olympic Winter Games have been met with barely concealed derision by representatives from the world‘s...

5
Bertrand Twisted 31.05.13 9:45pm
Sinnick
Lonely old woman adopted by thirty-six cats.

Reports are emerging of a remarkable story of cross-species altruism involving the adoption of a lonely old woman by a group of thirty-six cats. Homeless, penniless Abigail Pike, 74, was facing a...

10
sredni vashta 31.05.13 9:08pm
Titus
36 old women adopted by lonely cat.

Nod to sredni vashta...

1
raudus 31.05.13 7:40pm
Titus
"Jolly good show, Chaps" Says President As French Universities Teach In English

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/may/10/french-univerities-english-language...

1
Titus 31.05.13 7:39pm
Titus
Disappointment after tech start-up fails to die 0
Dumbnews 31.05.13 7:05pm
Dumbnews
Indian entrepreneur launches, "One smartphone for every American" intiative 0
Dumbnews 31.05.13 7:04pm
Dumbnews
New invention for gardeners with mobility issues - the strimmer frame 0
Smart Alex 31.05.13 6:56pm
Smart Alex
Language hits new low as Marketing executive uses 'Bette Davis Eyes' as a verb

The English language hit an all time low yesterday and some experts have predicted it may never recover. The incident happened when a marketing executive deliberately tried to use the words "Bette...

2
ronseal 31.05.13 6:44pm
Ref Minor
Man with solar powered combine harvester makes hay while the sun shines 3
blacklesbianandproudofit 31.05.13 4:49pm
Titus
how on earth did that happen?

Delete this it's a duplicate...

0
ronseal 31.05.13 3:53pm
ronseal
Small methodical caretaker takes steps to change light bulb. 3
weematt 31.05.13 2:50pm
Not Amused
Supermarket tannoy requests owner of 1977 Austin Allegro to leave car at home. 3
sredni vashta 31.05.13 2:50pm
blacklesbianandproudofit
Scientist will 'eat himself' to see if he'll disappear or double in size 2
DraculaBranded 31.05.13 2:46pm
Not Amused
"NewsBiscuit" Exposed As Front For International Criminal Spamming Syndicate

LECTOR SI MONUMENTUM REQUIRIS CIRCUMSPICE...

5
Titus 31.05.13 1:37pm
Titus
Government programme to encourage non-muslims to become terrorists

Maria Miller, Minister for Equalities, today announced a programme to encourage non-muslims to become terrorists. At a press conference today, she said: 'For too long, we have denied people of other...

3
John Wiltshire 31.05.13 1:35pm
John Wiltshire
Fireman Sam will cover Trumpton and Camberwick Green as well as Pontypandy

Due to government cutbacks, the fire services at Camberwick Green and Trumpton have been amalgamated with those in Pontypandy. There was anger in Trumpton as Captain Flack, Pugh, Pugh, Barney...

0
John Wiltshire 31.05.13 1:18pm
John Wiltshire
Deptford man has dream explored 'inception-style'

Inspired by the mind-bending Hollywood blockbuster – Inception - scientists have bravely infiltrated the layered subconscious of Dave Blanch, a forklift operative from Deptford, only to find a...

1
NorthernGravy 31.05.13 12:14pm
DraculaBranded
Pakistan Taliban elect next deputy to be blown up in a drone attack

After the death of Wali-ur-Rehman, the Pakistan Taliban have selected Khan Said as next in line to be blown up in a US drone attack. The hotly uncontested election heard impassioned speeches from...

3
johnnydobbo 31.05.13 11:48am
Wrenfoe
Google agrees to block offensive images of Home Secretary

"It's no fun at all having that old hag's fizzog pop up every time you're searching for porn," says CEO Erich Schmidt...

1
Landfill 31.05.13 10:47am
NewBiscuit
Reality TV in crisis as Britain faces ‘chronic shortage of wankers’

The broadcasting world is said to be facing a watershed moment as TV producers have been forced to admit that Britain’s’ stock of easily exploited, egotistical twats is running dangerously low....

10
TheNewsWalrus 31.05.13 10:20am
Midfield Diamond
Coalition split over moves to arm British soldiers in Afghanistan 1
blacklesbianandproudofit 31.05.13 9:55am
Wrenfoe
Nick Clegg disavows explorer Nick Hancock

Fears that the Deputy Prime Minister may be out of touch, were raised when Mr. Clegg suspended Nick Hancock from the Liberal Democrat Party. Mr. Clegg seemed unconcerned that Nick Hancock is a...

0
Wrenfoe 31.05.13 8:40am
Wrenfoe
Labour isn't working....

http://www.trekandmountain.com/wp-content/uploads/everest_sm-590x442.jpg, it's too busy climbing Everest. (P.S. for the benefit of our younger reader..see...

2
Son of Barnabas 31.05.13 7:41am
Titus
Moths finally twig if they come out during the day there will be loads of light 3
Smart Alex 31.05.13 7:40am
Titus
Incompatible Computer Programmers Divorce 2
Iggy Pop-Barker 31.05.13 7:39am
Titus
Fantasy football latest: Real Madrid to take on Unreal Madrid 3
nickb 31.05.13 7:39am
Titus
Australian 'Jesus' turns Fosters into lager at a wedding ceremony 3
ginty 31.05.13 7:38am
Titus