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US government forces Tesco to hand over customers' clubcard details. 4
dominic_mcg 3 years

The Obama administration has subpoenaed UK supermarket Tesco for clubcard details of customers after 2 pensioners were seen buying leeks in Tesco's Tewkesbury store on Thursday. The US government...

OED adds new words - 2 34
simonjmr 3 years

"Faraged" - to be literally and actually hoisted with ones own petard "Portillo" - the moment when smug satisfaction turns into grim realisation that you fears are actually real. "Jacqui" - a...

Not to be outdone, Janet Street-Porter to go skinny dipping. 4
Ostsee 3 years
Unemployed Cricket Fans, Listening To Ashes On Longwave... 1
Jesse Bigg 3 years

blame sudden switch to Shipping Forecast, in last moments of the game, on nasty Tory revenge plot...

'Not All Doom And Gloom For Chelsea' Gag Misfires...... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

.due to own goal joke...

Jack Straw warns pet owners about dog groomers. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
New Ultra-Thin TV's Finally Kill Off...... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

..Morecambe and Wise fruit bowl gag...

The BBC receives 7000 complaints that the VAT rise has not affected Walford 0
Rizzo 3 years

Switchboards at the BBC were jammed last night as angry viewers of Eastenders called in their thousands to complain that the VAT rise to 20% had not affected items seen in the show. Mark Jones, a...

Souvenirs from the Museum of the American Indian proudly made in China 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Chris Moyles' arse blamed for flu jab shortage 0
Matt T 3 years

Radio One Breakfast Show host, Chris Moyles has been named as the reason for the current shortage of flu jabs in a leaked Government email. Problems apparently began after attempts to immunise...

Jack Straw accused of taking advantage of young and vulnerable Pakistani rapists 0
greg various 3 years
Ruddy-faced meat purveyor mocks weedy buddhist monk... 1
Doylem 3 years

The dark side of Mr Whippy 8
georgeh 3 years

Recent research by the WHO has revealed that worldwide, over a quarter of places in long-term psychiatric institutions are now occupied by former travelling ice-cream salesman. In over 90% of cases,...

British Darts Organisation imposes minimum standards for female spectator beauty 1
brownpaperreporter 3 years

In an attempt to boost attendances, the BDO have now given themselves the right to turn away female spectators bordering on the “pig ugly” and only let the “hotties” through to boost TV...

Trading Standards doubt Katie Price food range has "nothing artificial added" 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years
Man caught ‘kissing books in Waterstones’ claims he was lip-reading. More soon. 2
malgor 3 years
Newsbiscuit writer told to pull his socksub. 17
Trickster 3 years
Merkel says Dioxin-filled eggs are German 'Gift' to Europe 2
pinxit 3 years

Demnächst mehr...

As East Enders gets edgeier casting seeks a mom that is fed up with their kid 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
“Pick up the soap, Chaytor. I said ‘pick up the soap’”... 1
Doylem 3 years
Ex-MPs: 0
Iscariot 3 years

Before you're sentenced for robbing the people, ensure your prison is burnt to the ground...

Neighbourhood Watch: putting ‘peeping Tom’ tendencies on a more formal footing. 0
Doylem 3 years
Newsbiscuit revealed as source of daily mail 0
4ty2 3 years

[url=]looking for mobile phone records[/url]...

“Why me? Anyone in here could have claimed those pineapple chunks on expenses." 0
Doylem 3 years
London Eye to be renamed EDF Energy London Eye 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years

EDF Energy announced today it would lower the Eye's carbon footprint by turning it into a human powered treadmill to generate electricity...

Middle-aged man still baffled by complicated handshakes... 0
Doylem 3 years
Mr Kipling Agent Orange Slices perfectly safe to eat 0
greg various 3 years

say Food Falling Standards Agency...

All German Eggs "Now Proven to Cure Cancer" claim Homeopathic researchers 0
Jammydodgers 3 years

after traces of dioxin contamination were found in the feed given to some chickens...

Michael Gove demands Health & Safety undergo 'psychiatric evaluation' 0
pinxit 3 years
Critics of Bristol Police Insensitivity Told to "Put a Sock in It" 0
De-scribe 3 years