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Coincidence Anonymous meetings start with *my* name is Arthur Jenkins too!

The association for people addicted to coincidences first meeting has collapsed into chaos when all 2,500 people turned out to all be called Arthur Jenkins. The president, Miss Arthur Jenkins, said;...

apepper 28.09.13 6:41pm
Trevor McDonald probes Women Behind Bars in new TV series

Revealing their secrets in episode 1 are Deirdre Jeffbinin from the Coach and Horses in Soho, Phylis Sy from the Dirty Duck in Dartford and Edwina Vindaloo from the House of Commons bar (or, as it is...

farmer giles 28.09.13 5:04pm
farmer giles
Grand Theft Otto Von Bismarck (1913) “the first ever video game”, say historians

“One minute your task is to penetrate the complex underwear of a fin de siècle courtesan. Then you are trying to “hot wire” an 1898 Daimler whose top speed was 12 miles per hour!” exclaims...

nickb 28.09.13 4:42pm
Jesus H
I presume we've had florists announcing the death of the Wreath Lectures?

(Sorry, I've been on holiday.)...

Titus 28.09.13 4:23pm
Islamists Anonymous Demand Right To Wear Niqābs At Their Meetings

"My name is Aamina and I am -" "How do we know? You're wearing a niqāb." "'Course I'm wearing a niqāb. It's Islamists Anonynmous innit?" "But you're not a member." "Yes I am - I paid my sub...

Titus 28.09.13 4:12pm
Amnesiacs Anonymous support group starts badly. ' My name' 1
MADJEZ 28.09.13 3:37pm
Rouhani returns to Tehran in middle of shoddy footwear protest. More soon. 1
Al OPecia 28.09.13 3:34pm
One quarter of Thatchers ashes laid to rest at Chelsea Hospital.

The first quarter of Lady Thatchers ashes were today interred at Chelsea Hospital in a private ceremony attended by the currently dead premiers family and close friends. The next quarter are due to...

Ref Minor 28.09.13 3:32pm
Ref Minor
conspiracy world shocked after man says its all rubbish

A Mr Michael Smug of England today dropped the biggest bombshell ever to all conspiracy theorists and critical thinkers around the GLOBE stopping them ALL dead in their tracks., In a blog from his...

mrfreaklips 28.09.13 1:11pm
Breaking bad fans angered by "it was all a bad dream" ending

No more soon...

nickb 28.09.13 9:44am
Taxonomists confirm Tories are 'lower than vermin'

Sixty-five years after Aneurin Bevan described Tories as 'lower than vermin', taxonomists have confirmed that the Labour politician's classification is correct. The news may come as an embarrassment...

roybland 28.09.13 9:42am
Ignore - old news

FOR HOUSEKEEPING PURPOSES ONLY. NOT SUBMISSION. Davros to no longer receive incapacity benefit Davros, creator of the Daleks, has reacted angrily to news that he will no longer be eligible for...

Darkbill 2.0 28.09.13 7:36am
Jacques Costeau to deliver Reef Lectures. 1
Cinders 28.09.13 6:38am
Prime Minister admits to falling asleep whilst running country

A British prime minister has admitted to falling asleep when he was supposed to be in charge of the country. The prime minister, who hasn't been named, also said that the deputy prime minister was...

apepper 28.09.13 3:03am
2014 World War One Commemorations will be over by Christmas claim Generals. 1
Zen 28.09.13 2:56am
Succinct speaker to deliver the 2014 Brief lectures

(gets coat)...

Smart Alex 27.09.13 10:49pm
Smart Alex
UN asks Nick Clegg - 'Who the f**k are you?'

While our glorious Deputy Prime Minister lectured the General Assembly in New York on their general failings, people from around the world asked as one: 'Who is this bozo?'. Undaunted by their...

Wrenfoe 27.09.13 10:38pm
Two pound coin collector claims 'they'll be worth alot, one day' 0
TobiasBV 27.09.13 10:11pm
RIM Announces New Beer Mat Division. More Soon

Reposting from chat room...

Kurt Degerstrom 27.09.13 10:08pm
Kurt Degerstrom
Party Conference Hysteria Grips Britain’s Teens

A new craze is sweeping through communities the length and breadth of Britain with a devastating effect on the health and wellbeing of the nation’s teenagers. A phenomenon which combines a hysteria...

Ned Geller 27.09.13 10:03pm
Ned Geller
Public in shock as conspiracy theorist reveals truths on blog

The world was stunned today as Peter Wells revealed shocking truths about the unknown ruling elite who are the puppet masters of international government., In a new post on his personal blog...

fernandomando 27.09.13 8:07pm
Al OPecia
Man with upturned nose on forehead branded a snob

More nose later...

davetwojackets 27.09.13 8:05pm
Dentist to deliver teeth lectures...

as a fill-in...

Loundshay 27.09.13 7:54pm
Mick Jagger to deliver Keef lectures 0
nickb 27.09.13 7:50pm
Rouhani presents John Kerry with Persian Rug. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 27.09.13 7:44pm
Al OPecia
DFID support for Kenyan pop-up shop programme "to be re-thought". 0
Al OPecia 27.09.13 7:34pm
Al OPecia
Smoking reduces stress of consequences of smoking, says smoker 1
Dumbnews 27.09.13 7:31pm
Al OPecia
Zombies 'sick to death' of inaccurate and offensive portrayal during Halloween

As Halloween fast approaches, several zombies have aired their frustration at being portrayed as 'brain-dead, blood-sucking monsters', and have called for retailers to remove fake blood, masks and...

Jesus H 27.09.13 6:17pm
Emotional roller-coaster closed due to instability.

Hat-tip to nickb...

FOAD 27.09.13 5:58pm
Couple addicted to sex diagnosed as bonkers

Shirly must have been done?...

beau-jolly 27.09.13 4:38pm