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Suicide bombers and gunmen at Kabul hotel still failed to catch waiter’s eye 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Turkey Twizzlers touted as new superfood 0
Captainzep 3 years

Turkey Twizzlers touted as new superfood...

Iceland to turn off Northern Lights to save energy and reduce global warming 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Daily Mail reports that BBC drama Luther to show most distressing scenes ever 0
simonjmr 3 years

The scene will be about gay, single parent, black, benefit claimant asylum seekers enjoying themselves at a party. More soon...

UK's Minors announce unanimous support for teachers strikes 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Childminders welcome teachers' strike, increase prices to £200 per day 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Pope sends tweets, but God now only uses Google+ 0
Mark66 3 years

more later?...

dyslexic doctor tells patient 'you can't have children because you're impatient' 0
Leeboy007 3 years
David Haye 'may have gone too far' after saying he will eat Klitschko's children 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Strike to knock thousands off property values, reveals Daily Mail 0
FraserWords 3 years
87% of 9 year olds think ‘fucking caravan’ is correct expression 20
Des Custard 3 years

A survey of children who had been on long journeys in the family car over the half term break has revealed that 87% of nine year olds think ‘fucking caravan’ is the correct technical expression. ...

Days after Glastonbury, non-attendees still plagued by dull festival anecdotes. 2
PamChristianAnderson 3 years

No more soon. Please...

Ticketless Olympics fans reassured: "It's going to be really boring" 1
FraserWords 3 years

Lord Coe last night told hundreds of millions of disappointed sports fans who missed out on Olympics tickets: “Cheer up – it’s all going to be really, really boring so you won’t miss...

Footballer “Shamed” by Faithful Relationship. 2
Fox100 3 years

A leading England footballer admitted his “shame” after being caught in a long-term, monogamous, faithful relationship by a tabloid newspaper this week. The star, who is attempting to remain...

Clarkson speeding offence incurs radical new penalty 0
Tom55 3 years

In a striking departure from normal sentencing after Jeremy Clarkson's latest speeding conviction, Judge Margot Fuller ordered that a 6 Berth Eldis Crusader caravan be attached to his Ferrari for 12...

Greece to fix economy by switching it off and back on again 2
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Appointment of female IMF chief greeted with relief by New York hotel maids 1
roybland 3 years
BBC unveils new pre-vandalised Blue Peter garden 4
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

The BBC has unveiled a new-look, pre-vandalised Blue Peter garden ahead of the programme’s move to Salford next week. The BBC’s flagship children’s magazine programme is being relocated from...

Hundreds commit suicide after watching uplifting Eastenders episode 9
OllieP 3 years

BBC bosses have been forced to apologise this week as hundreds of viewers ended their lives after an uplifting episode of flagship soap Eastenders was broadcast, shattering the audience's belief that...

Rising cost of Prince Charles may push recovery off course 0
roybland 3 years
Chocoholics Anonymous welcomes Thorntons closures 0
roybland 3 years
Burglar stabbed in raid targeted bingo winner but got wrong housey-housey 0
roybland 3 years
Mathematicians call time on the "Piebald horse has 3.142 balls" joke 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years
Light-hearted, happy stories to dominate soaps this Christmas... 7
victory V 3 years

nah, just kidding...

Nadal fit to continue. Murray semi-final exit confirmed. 1
Christopher Frost 3 years
15 hours in a Glastonbury toilet would kill most people admits Eavis 0
Midfield Diamond 3 years
Demand grows for footballer Craig Thomson to live on benefits 0
Christopher Frost 3 years
Police dogs found dead in car ‘probably committed suicide’ say police 3
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Ancient manuscript proves King Cunt probably was. 2
wallster 3 years

A recently discovered copy of the Anglo Saxon Winchester Chronicle is shedding light on the life of a long forgotten Viking chieftan, King Cunt. The early 10th century warlord was methodically...

Cameron plans sympathy strike 0
Christopher Frost 3 years