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ONS say horse jokes killing the economy; 'we need to reverse this murder'

Britain’s economic output is being put at ‘serious risk’, according to the office of national statistics, because of the amount of time wasted at work with people searching for or creating...

Perks 17.02.13 6:19pm
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History of Michael Gove to be made compulsory in secondary schools

GCSE pupils will have to study the story of Michael Gove as part of a new compulsory history curriculum put forward by the Department for Education “Children as young as six will be told the...

nickb 17.02.13 6:16pm
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The pope’s no longer catholic and a pig’s arse is 29% horse

there is even some doubt over the defecation habits of bears, so in an uncertain world, what questions can we still ask that brook no argument? [list=1]Are the police racist? Is Colin Jackson gay?...

lane-avenger 17.02.13 6:14pm
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Royal Institute of Shelf-stackers welcomes IDS statement

The Royal Institute of Shelf-stackers (RISS) has welcomed works and pensions secretary Iain Duncan Smith's statement on the Andrew Marr Show that shelf-stacking may be more important than geology or...

roybland 17.02.13 6:11pm
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Feral cats only getting one good meal per day: Strays going hungry A new study published in Nature Communications has revealed that outdoor cats in America struggle to catch even one meal per day. Farm, feral, stray and garden cats...

GordonChen 17.02.13 6:07pm
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Meteorite impacts "just a scare story got up by scientists to secure funding". 2
Al OPecia 17.02.13 6:06pm
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Impatient Prince Charles becomes patron of King Charles II Society 10
sydalg 17.02.13 6:01pm
New fears over saddle of lamb 3
Scroat 17.02.13 6:01pm
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PCC to construct Olympic Swimming Pool the size of a medium-to-largish asteroid

More soon from a BBC Science Correspondent...

Audible Minority 17.02.13 9:54am
Audible Minority
Mossad accuses Iran of developing deadly meteorites underground

Israel’s intelligence service, Mossad, has claimed to have ‘really quite good’ information that proves Iran is secretly testing secret meteorites, deep inside a secret cavern in the secret...

17.02.13 9:41am
Audible Minority
Pope rethinks resignation as meteorite misses Vatican

"The danger is past - back to business."...

sydalg 17.02.13 9:36am
Food Magazine: TESCO's Value Lasagne (improved recipe) is the Dog's Bollocks

See, not a horse in sight...

Sinnick 17.02.13 9:12am
Police probe claim Pistorius shot off own feet to qualify for Paralympics 0
sydalg 17.02.13 8:32am
Tory compromise: two hangings for each gay marriage and it's a deal 0
sydalg 17.02.13 7:04am
Shock as rejected candidates in Eastleigh by-election to be turned into dog food 0
sydalg 17.02.13 7:01am
Billionaire invests in new restaurant chain, "Warren's Buffet" 0
Dumbnews 17.02.13 12:54am
Sex accused 'should get anonymity', claim 'Savile's Law', campaigners 0
topfotogmw 17.02.13 12:23am
Sekola and Gosetheweezal shorlisted for Pope - full list below

Cardinals Sekola and Gosetheweezal head an impressive list of candidates to replace the recently retired pope. Candidate Profiles Pope Sekola - would be a refreshing change, if strangely bad for...

apepper 16.02.13 11:16pm
Mars Rover mothballed as MoT falls due and no one there to test it. Less soon. 1
Maverick 16.02.13 11:10pm
Scandal Naming Board decides Horse meat crisis should be Startersgate 4
ronseal 16.02.13 10:43pm
Basmati rice price hike bitter pillau to swallow 1
custard cream 16.02.13 10:37pm
“Pope had to resign-to collect lottery winnings" says Euromillions spokesman 8
jenlon 16.02.13 10:36pm
Association of Gay Footballers goes into administration...

In a week when footballer Robbie Rogers ‘came out’ as gay, and retired from the game, Gordon Starkey, secretary of the Association of Gay Footballers, has announced that the society is going into...

Tripod 16.02.13 10:34pm
Romanian Trade Board launches taste test campaign - Can you tell the difference? 0
lane-avenger 16.02.13 10:32pm
Angela Merkel snapped while making butch lesbian hand gestures.

Angela Merkel has been accused of demeaning international relations by apprearing to play a fetish sex game whilst at international conferences. Merkel (not an innuendo) has been playing the butch...

jenlon 16.02.13 10:09pm
Sandown supermarket tests reveal traces of jockeys. 0
Maverick 16.02.13 9:39pm
Man who hung banners comemorating Black History Month accused of insensitivity 1
custard cream 16.02.13 7:21pm
Pistorius blames lonely upbringing

It was tough growing up without any aunties and ankles...

lane-avenger 16.02.13 7:18pm
After reinstating the 10p tax rate, Miliband to 'un-invade Iraq'

Following the broad agreement with his decision to reinstate the ten-pence tax rate, Ed Miliband has seized on the opportunity to make it Labour policy to undo some of the unpopular choices he agreed...

Perks 16.02.13 6:07pm
Teenage boy's mother in "get off the fucking computer" storm

Father forced to clear out garage...

lane-avenger 16.02.13 6:04pm