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Kim Jong Il dies of ronery-ness aged 69.

Harrowwwwww more soon...

MADJEZ 19.12.11 5:20pm
He was... The People's Dictator of all Our Hearts, Blair to tell Korean mourners

Tony Blair has landed a prestigious speaking engagement in North Korea, where he's been asked to warm up the crowd at the funeral of Kim Jong il. North Korean officials were apparently impressed by...

ronseal 20.12.11 1:07pm
Al OPecia
Cops dismiss constraint tactics of rioting fisherman as different kettle of fish 0
button 19.12.11 4:38pm
Modern extreme doggers confirm they wouldn't stoop as low as a Krankie 0
simonjmr 19.12.11 4:26pm
Nick Clegg ponders if his work / life balance is right? 0
simonjmr 19.12.11 4:23pm
Obituary - Kim Jong-il

Kim Jong-il has today died at the age of 69 from, according to local media, a severe case of caring too much. A secretive figure, much of what we know about his life is cobbled together from official...

Newsquelch 19.12.11 4:00pm
Kim Nominated with Posthumous Oscar for role as Kim Jong-il

Yuri Irsenovich Kim is to be nominated for a posthumous Oscar and Life time achievement award at the forth coming 84th Academy Award Ceremony in February. Kim, who famously undertook the role of...

A.Parody 19.12.11 3:47pm
Ten million versions of "I was Jong-il's double" published in North Korea. 0
dominic_mcg 19.12.11 3:02pm
Good news as safety inspection give Fukushima nuclear plant "A glowing report". 5
dvo4fun 19.12.11 7:23pm
EUripedes.... clothes off and underneath is.... SUPERCAM!!!!!!! He pushes planets out of orbit!, he leaps buildings with a single bound!!!, . he can resist pissing...

Son of Barnabas 19.12.11 1:56pm
Son of Barnabas
Kim Jong Ill to be replaced by Jeffrey Bernard. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 19.12.11 1:32pm
Al OPecia
Black Panther spotted on Isle of Wight

The Isle of Wight Council today confirmed that it was drafting, in extra police officers in the hunt for a black panther, following a, number of reports by islanders. In a recent press release,...

fernandomando 07.01.12 2:27pm
Environmentally conscious carpet cleaner tormented by his carbon footprint 0
medici2471 19.12.11 1:29pm
Golf world in mourning at passing of world's greatest golfer. 7
bonjonelson 21.12.11 9:05pm
Car traditionalists mourn as the last original Citroen Saxo gets pimped.

Wierdy beardy traditionalists were crying into their warm brown beer this weekend as it was announced that there are now no Citroen Saxo's remaining in their original condition. The last one was...

grottymonty 19.12.11 12:57pm
Wikileaks Trial: Bradley Manning to reveal family link to Bernard

Leaked information from the team defending Bradley Manning shows that he was deeply affected by the close family ties he had with his uncle, the late Bernard Manning. Few people know that British...

nickb 19.12.11 12:51pm
Donald Neilson dies. Theme from Midnight Cowboy guaranteed Xmas No1.

is that right?...

wallster 19.12.11 1:48pm
Family faces bleak Christmas as text message announces Sellotape safety recall

Christmas has again been ruined for Britain’s most credulous man, this time by a late-night text message announcing a safety recall on Sellotape. The recall was made at 12.27am and applies to short...

20.12.11 4:37pm
Tombliboo un takes charge in North Korea 0
grottymonty 19.12.11 12:11pm
Kim Jong II to be succeeded by brother Jim 0
Drylaw 19.12.11 12:10pm
King Kong II release causes panic in South Korea 0
medici2471 19.12.11 11:36am
Hague fury as Kim Jong Il death too late to stop Xmas card

Foreign Secretary William Hague has today spoken of his anger that North Korean leader Kim Jong Il couldn’t have died a couple of days sooner, prior to the UK sending him a Christmas card....

ianslat 19.12.11 11:12am
Kim Jong Ill to be succeeded by Kim Jong Unwell

Kim Jong Offcolour expected in 2025 as Korean health standards show slight improvement...

tedweasel 19.12.11 11:31am
Smart Alex
Ant and Dec to host Jong-il exit show 0
charlies_hat 19.12.11 10:11am
Shock at hearing he had a"'pretty girl's name" proves too much for Korean leader

.. (Sorry, has someone done this one already?)...

Username 19.12.11 9:51am
Kim Jong Dead - he'd been Il for a while 5
simonjmr 19.12.11 4:24pm
Kim Jong-il heart attack

triggered by realisation that all his savings are in Euros...

John Ffitch-Rucker 19.12.11 9:43am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Joy as Footballers Wives goes to Christmas Number One

[digitally remastered in anticipation] It has been described as the ultimate feel-good story, an anthem sung by a choir made up entirely of the wives of Britain's heroic footballers, and it has now...

Oxbridge 19.12.11 1:11pm
FSA to advise IMF & ECB on lending to people who can’t afford the repayments 1
Duncan Biscuit 19.12.11 9:38am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Strictly and Dr Who stars back plan to rename BBC News as ‘News about the BBC’ 2
Duncan Biscuit 19.12.11 3:04pm