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South-East Facing Hosepipe Ban, Gardeners to Water in North-West Direction 0
thisisall1word 12.03.12 10:43pm
Gay bishop attacks straight marriage

More to follow...

apepper 12.03.12 10:04pm
Lib Dems diagnosed with "locked-in-coalition" syndrome 1
Mandy Lifeboat 12.03.12 9:57pm
Catholic clergy up in arms over gay marriage ban

"If they're not going to allow gay marriage," said Father Ben Dover today, "What in heaven has been the point of all the work we've put in grooming and sodomising the flower of the youth of our...

JustSomeBloke 12.03.12 9:19pm
NHS Direct to be replaced with reading the Daily Mail

The latest attempt at reforming the National Health Service by ‘Minister for the sick and clumsy’ Andrew Lansley is to save money by scraping NHS Direct and encouraging ill people to read the...

Immunis 12.03.12 7:10pm
Eric Joyce quits as Labour MP to join US Army in Kandahar 0
cinquecento 12.03.12 4:48pm
Shinawatra weleashesh new shingle "I did it Thai way". 0
Ian Searle 12.03.12 4:37pm
Ian Searle
Tudor re-enactor tobacco smokers face hose and pipe ban 0
simonjmr 12.03.12 3:58pm
No Met leak culture - claims senior News International Exec on behalf of Met 0
simonjmr 12.03.12 3:17pm
Sales of rope and paracetamol soar in wake of hosepipe ban

Morose, no?...

Qoxiivi 12.03.12 2:34pm
Costa to ban loyalty-card abusers

A Woking man who used a loyalty card to obtain discount cups of coffee from his local Costa coffee shop has been branded a ‘shameless coffee whore’ by store manager Brad Fuller after being...

Earl Van Dyke 12.03.12 2:32pm
Porn stars can now claim for 'peepee eye' for unwanted facials. 0
MADJEZ 12.03.12 1:43pm
Shinawatra set to up his game following Whyte's failure of 'fit and proper' test 4
Midfield Diamond 12.03.12 1:29pm
Midfield Diamond
Nick Clegg: "Go back to your constituencies, and prepare for oblivion"

I honestly hadn't realised the LibDems had a spring conference. Not exactly high profile, then. It would be nice if someone could do a parody of Cleggie's speech, though I guess the moment has gone...

Sinnick 12.03.12 1:16pm
Farmers' markets a threat to Britain's high streets, says report

Britain's high streets are blighted by the spread of farmers' markets and their weird customers, according to retail expert Mary Portas. 'It's not just the unsightly appearance of these outlets...

roybland 12.03.12 12:51pm
'Right-to-die' opposers say people should be left-to-die 0
charlies_hat 12.03.12 12:32pm
Oranges not the only fruit, confirms fructotaxonomist 0
cinquecento 12.03.12 12:25pm
Rare Brie wins 2012 Kraft's 0
simonjmr 12.03.12 11:52am
Kate Middleton woos crowds with 'Fuck Morrissey' t-shirt 1
12.03.12 11:48am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Oppose gay marriage, say ageing transvestite child molesters 0
Oxbridge 12.03.12 11:48am
Doctor solves flu jab shortage by injecting patients with Lemsip

A junior doctor in Bristol today made national headlines by ensuring that all people classed ‘high-risk’ flu sufferers would receive a jab to reduce their likelihood of contracting the...

kimllfixit 12.03.12 11:42am
Global Financial Crisis "could spread to rest of world" say European economists 0
Nick McCarr 12.03.12 11:39am
Nick McCarr
Female F1 test driver is ideal candidate as she doesn't need to park. 0
seymour totti 12.03.12 11:13am
seymour totti
Corporate man's laughter "led to corporate manslaughter", says QC

When CEO Jeff Lopez laughed derisively at a junior colleague’s plans to improve the company website, he didn’t realise it would cause that colleague’s eventual death, a court heard. But...

nickb 12.03.12 10:34am
Duracell profit warning after EU battery hen ban.

"The last straw." said Duracell's spokesman in a highly charged press conference, " Following on from the previously reported loss of our AAA and AA ranges due to the financial situation in Europe we...

weematt 12.03.12 10:15am
Tabloids dub Vampire with hayfever as "The Pollen Count". 0
seymour totti 12.03.12 10:13am
seymour totti
Lib Dems win Crufts

"I'm comfortable with the term 'political poodle' if it means being the winning poodle," Nick Clegg told a rapturous crowd at the end of the Lib Dem conference. "First we win a place in government,...

nickb 12.03.12 9:58am
Prince Harry extends Jubilee tour to Columbia to be 'coked' up again 0
thackaray 12.03.12 9:55am
Excitement over Diamond Jubilee and Olympics can kill, say doctors

Over-excitement caused by the Queen's Diamond Jubilee will kill more older people this year than hyperthermia and over-excitement about the Olympics will kill more young people than the use of legal...

roybland 12.03.12 9:47am
Nick Clegg claims amendments to football rules mean he didn't score 'own goal'

Nick Clegg has upset members of his party during a charity football match at their spring conference by picking up his ball and walking off mid-match. His stubborn child -like behaviour comes as the...

Perks 12.03.12 9:45am