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President Barack Obama making state visit to appear on The Archers. 0
Stan 3 years

It has been confirmed that United States President Barack Obama will visit the UK in May, primarily to record an episode of The Archers. President Obama is known to be a keen fan of the long running...

MPs told S&M is SLS 0
Farnworth-Innit 3 years

Coalition MPs were urged to up the ante on the sleaze front today, being encouraged to get involved in any number of sordid activities. In a brief interview given in-between poll dancers, Jeremy...

Steven Spielberg shocks the film world by teaming up with Adolf Hitler 6
3 years

to make "Back to the Führer"...

'Rearranging Titanic's deckchairs would have saved 1,500 lives,' say researchers 7
Des and Stan 3 years

Ninety nine years after the infamous sinking of RMS Titanic, marine historians believe that 1,517 souls could have avoided a watery grave if the crew had been properly trained in the art of deckchair...

Sell-out left wing stand up comic accused of corporate mans laughter 1
ronseal 3 years

StaNd up comic Tim Davies could be the first man to be charged under new Corporate Mans Laughter legislation., The leftier-than-thou moral exhibitionist, who spent a decade accusing the middle...

Egotistical autosarcophagist was ‘sooo full of himself’ autopsy reveals. 2
malgor 3 years
Concern winds of change in Middle East may lead to another awful Scorpions song 2
Skylarking 3 years

More whistling solos soon...

Middle East calls for clam 0
beau-jolly 3 years

..due to an unfortunate typo...

Miliband attacks government over forest apology 4
John Wiltshire 3 years

'You'll never catch Labour being sorry for anything, and saying we got it wrong!' he laughed...

House of Lords suspected sleeper cell infiltration concerns 0
simonjmr 3 years
40 years on, schoolboy visionary is recognised 12
Oxbridge 3 years

A historic wrong has finally been belatedly righted, with the award of the 1971 ‘Science in Schools’ Essay Prize to Raymond Snodgrass, a 52-year-old petrol station manager from Worksop. Snodgrass...

Gordon Ramsay to Host Celebrity Bastardchef 0
Grover 3 years

Responding to accusations of "dumbing down" the Masterchef format, the BBC has announced Michelin-starred celebrity chef and world-renowned cunt Gordon Ramsay is to present and judge the forthcoming...

Young girl propositioned after man sees her on the web Cowell denies wrong doing 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Sam Cam helps launch Fashion Week, Mrs. Clegg opens charity shop. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Group of Welsh vicars emotional over same-sex Church weddings 6
OllieP 3 years

A group of Welsh vicars have reacted petulantly to news the Government may permit same-sex couples to "marry" in Church. It comes as Equalities Minister Lynne Featherstone plans to scrap the ban on...

Mafia vendetta helps cement relations 3
Des Custard 3 years
BBC denies dumbing down MasterChef 6
Mrs Doyle 3 years

The BBC came under fire today amid accusations of dumbing down MasterChef after secret tapes of the current series’ final were leaked. A programme previously known for its challenging format,...

Where are they now? Nick Clegg 1
simonjmr 3 years

Nicholas William Peter "Nick" Clegg (born 7 January 1967) is a British Liberal Democrat politician and is the Member of Parliament (MP) for Sheffield Hallam. Clegg's first major elected position was...

Clas Ohlsen refuse to rename 'own-brand' binoculars 0
3 years
Chamber of Commerce say name change has not worked 2
Gerontius 3 years

Representatives from the Chamber of Commerce on the Isle of Wight say although they agree in principal to the recent name change given to the seaport town of Cowes, the new name has not entirely...

Devon police act to calm fears - launch Operation Headless Chicken 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

Devon police today rushed to reassure residents concerned about their children's safety., 'We've managed to catch one pedo,' said Det Inspector Ron Barnaby. 'But there's probably loads more out...

Pussy teen parks in disabled mans' spot with ACNE truck. 0
3 years
Badger cull decision ‘not black or white’ 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
'Perfect example' of Fiona Bruce valued at Antiques Roadshow 0
Des and Stan 3 years

Antiques experts were delighted when the BBC bought along a priceless Fiona Bruce figurine for valuation at a recording of The Antiques Roadshow during last summer. In the show, due to be broadcast...

Frankie Howerd Appreciation Society launches ‘Titter’ 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
To dampen criticism,wealthy Bahrain is to import Egyptian protestors to shoot. 0
3 years
Riot police van grabs pole position for Bahrain Grand Prix 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Reggae tribute act "The Japanese Wailers" accidently boarded by Greenpeace. 3
Skylarking 3 years

More soon, Jah know...

Justin Bieber says, love is like a dog, sometimes it just takes you from behind. 1
3 years
American studying foreign words in Japanese for 2 straight weeks goes into 0
3 years

katakonic coma...