Topic — Add New » Comments Votes Author Last Comment
Ed Balls revealed as Frankie Howerd's secret love child 0
nostra da mouse 19.03.12 4:08pm
nostra da mouse
Scotland to vote on independence from 6 Nations. 4
Griffin 19.03.12 3:36pm
simonjmr
Cardiologist arrested

more later...

3
dvo4fun 19.03.12 3:33pm
weematt
Rangers latest: Bidders withdraw, turn their attention to Kilmarnock

(In case no-one noticed, Killie beat Celtic to win a cup on Sunday)...

0
weematt 19.03.12 3:29pm
weematt
Osbourne to quaff Krug during "budget for the working man"

George Osbourne is widely expected to use his prerogative as Chancellor to enjoy a bottle of 1996 Krug [i]Clos du Mesnil[/i] Champagne as he delivers the annual budget speech on Wednesday. With many...

0
grumblechops 19.03.12 3:21pm
grumblechops
Millets' rescue plan 'will be intense'

more later err is that my coat over there?...

8
dvo4fun 19.03.12 3:14pm
dvo4fun
Downing Street to become a toll road

The Government has unveiled plans to increase private investment in Britain’s road network, starting with the introduction of a toll for MPs, visiting foreign leaders and other political road-users...

2
Long Distance Clara 19.03.12 3:12pm
Sinnick
Iron Lady’s “Pay Cut Joy” is no laughing matter

Margaret Thatcher’s euphoria over leaked Budget plans, to freeze or reduce public sector pay, has affected her bipolar disorder, according to Sir Mark Thatcher. “Whilst bipolar disorder does...

0
dvo4fun 19.03.12 2:42pm
dvo4fun
New law requires 50% of all Newsbiscuit posts to be written by women 8
quango 19.03.12 2:31pm
kimllfixit
Möbius stripper to give her side of the story

Notorious Möbius stripper is planning to give her side of the story in a forthcoming autobiography. Critics suspect, it might be very similar to the previously heard first side of the story...

0
apepper 19.03.12 2:30pm
apepper
Road network investment to be taken from M1,M2,M3 and M4

one for the economics students...

0
charlies_hat 19.03.12 2:26pm
charlies_hat
Daily Mail regret 'Asylum seeker uses valuable NHS resources' sports headline. 1
MADJEZ 19.03.12 2:24pm
kimllfixit
Truants win legal right to attend school then not show up 0
Mathna 19.03.12 1:39pm
Mathna
Massive hippopotamus and teeny little bird hail 'essential relationship'

A massive hippopotamus and a teeny tiny little bird have hailed their ‘unique and essential relationship’, during a three-day visit to the hippopotamus’s backside by the bird this week. In a...

13
The Paper Ostrich 19.03.12 1:22pm
Drylaw
Fans pray for recovery of critically ill footballer who isn't John Terry 1
Oxbridge 19.03.12 1:16pm
Drylaw
Children's hairdresser arrested for "grooming"

Has this been done before?...

1
JohnA 19.03.12 12:53pm
beau-jolly
withdrawn. 2
Mandy Lifeboat 19.03.12 11:06am
Midnight Dreary
Harry Redknapp favourite for Archbishop of Canterbury post. More soon. 0
GreenCross 19.03.12 9:02am
GreenCross
BBC scrapped Ford too soon

Responding to criticism that an old Ford was scrapped prematurely BBC Governors have told BBC Management to use old Fords a bit longer where possible. BBC's spokesman said "We did try to use the old...

0
weematt 19.03.12 8:59am
weematt
Millet's shoplifting suspect arrested, found loitering with intent.

inspired(?) by dvo4fun, expect some camp humour now...

0
weematt 19.03.12 8:13am
weematt
Met Police water cannon plans scuppered by hosepipe ban 0
acwanaut 19.03.12 6:12am
acwanaut
"Just call me Emma" complains Hermione Granger actress

Sick and tired of forever being stereotyped as Hermione Granger, the nerdy girl heroine of the Harry Potter books, Emma Watson has pleaded for the media to put "all that Potter stuff" behind her.,...

0
Nick McCarr 19.03.12 4:56am
Nick McCarr
Ivory towers to become "elephant cruelty free"

Piano Protection Society expresses concern...

0
Nick McCarr 19.03.12 2:06am
Nick McCarr
Record attempt to watch entire F1 race ends in failure.

Retired bricklayer Greg Spencer's dreams of achieving a place in the Guinness Book Of World Records were dashed during lap 55 of the Australian Grand Prix when the horse blinkers he'd hoped would...

0
Boutros 19.03.12 1:08am
Boutros
Carefree OAP Blaring Ace Tunes on Bus leaves 3 Teenage Boys Terrified.

Sara crouch(37) recalls the 'tense atomsphere and sheer intimidation factor' caused by who she describes as a 'social misfit' and 'menace to public safety'., 'She was slouched back in her seat...

0
Tenpenny 19.03.12 12:37am
Tenpenny
Kings Cross renovation "disaster for getting to Hogwarts"

Luckily, I know someone who has a flying car...

0
quango 19.03.12 12:05am
quango
Sarkozy to have iPhone renamed.

Building on his theme of detesting too many foreign people in France Nicolas Sarkozy has turned his attention to products. If re-elected he has promised to legislate that the 'iPhone' will be called...

2
weematt 18.03.12 11:16pm
weematt
British Grand Prix in chaos as Silverstone named as new congestion zone

The British Grand Prix faces some radical changes as drivers will be liable for the congestion charge. Currently, racing cars do not carry registration plates, making automatic detection impossible...

1
apepper 18.03.12 11:06pm
FlashArry
Ryanair makes autopilots redundant

CEO Michael O'Leary announced today that in future Ryanair would cease to operate aircraft with fancy complicated autopilots and the like., "We like to keep tings simple and cheap at Ryanair." he...

4
weematt 18.03.12 10:25pm
The All New Jeni B
God to write second novel 3
Immunis 18.03.12 10:25pm
nickb