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Ashton-under-Lyne citizens subjected to universal Income Decimating System probe

A massive shake-up in benefit systems has been launched in Greater Manchester, with the first claims being made for a new universal credit payment known as IDS or the Income Decimating System. Over...

4
Dick Everyman 29.04.13 12:04pm
Paddy Berzinski
Future Children's TV Presenters To Be Vetted. Suitable Vet Already Hired. 0
Titus 29.04.13 11:22am
Titus
New financial institution founded to lend to tramps - the Vagabundesbank 0
sydalg 29.04.13 11:00am
sydalg
Ian Duncan Smith gives back benefits given back by rich pensioners

"Everybody's got the wrong end of the stick," Work and Pensioners Secretary Ian Duncan Smith told reporters this morning. "On the subject of sticks, for example, if you can afford your own stick and...

0
nickb 29.04.13 10:41am
nickb
Iain Duncan Smith defends the consolidation of names for benefit claimants

Today marks the start of the government’s scheme to consolidate the benefits of double barrelled names into a universal single barrelled name for those on benefits. Initially affecting new...

0
Not Amused 29.04.13 10:18am
Not Amused
Pensioners Urged To Hand Over Their Heating Allowance Direct To RBS Bosses

"Cut out the middle-man", rather than take Ian Duncan-Smith's advice just to hand it back to the government...

3
Titus 29.04.13 10:01am
nickb
Whoops

Way to similar to the one just below it that had been there longer...

2
Ian Searle 29.04.13 8:29am
Ian Searle
Plastic Surgeons - "Our Lips Are Sealed"

The Association of British Plastic Surgeons remained tight-lipped today over the new 'wonder treatment' that's the talk of the celebrity world. A spokesman declined to comment on the new procedure...

3
Pigeon of Wisdom 29.04.13 8:16am
Pigeon of Wisdom
Paedophile Denies Having Been A Children's TV Presenter

"I may be an admitted child molester" said convicted paedophile Arthur Blenkinsop "But I emphatically deny ever having sunk to the level of presenting children's television shows - I do have...

0
Titus 29.04.13 8:01am
Titus
Labour Party To Stop Describing Far-Right Opponents As "Swivel-Eyed Loons"

"Can't imagine why" says Ed Milliband...

0
Titus 29.04.13 7:52am
Titus
Manufacturer of cooking sherry finally admits it's really aimed at tramp market 0
sydalg 29.04.13 7:33am
sydalg
Down-and-out ex-wife of FA star admits to being wagabond 1
sydalg 29.04.13 7:24am
Titus
Richard III's head to replace Marvin on JLS' farewell tour 0
victimms 29.04.13 7:14am
victimms
Ken Clarke to judge UKIP fruitcake competition 0
nickb 29.04.13 7:03am
nickb
Pubic hair dye to be marketed as Vagablonde

(gets coat)...

0
Smart Alex 29.04.13 7:01am
Smart Alex
BBC to continue sponsorship of Emeli Sande

Block booked for all ceremonies...

0
virtuallywill 29.04.13 6:16am
virtuallywill
Vacancies coming up in comedy for the over 65s, predicts Yewtree officer 0
sydalg 29.04.13 12:41am
sydalg
Failed Bank To Issue Vagabonds

Senior staff to be re-deployed...

0
Titus 28.04.13 11:36pm
Titus
Homeless Spy Movie Franchise 'Rebooted' with Latest Vagabond Film

The Hobo-centric movie studio VanVision Tramp have announced that they are 'rebooting' their successful Vagabond franchise., "We're really existed about this new chapter" Mumbled studio head honcho...

1
thisisall1word 28.04.13 11:29pm
Titus
Government launches 'Bully a Fat Kid' day in major anti-obesity drive 0
sydalg 28.04.13 11:23pm
sydalg
Dhaka Collapse Victims Survived Because They Were Used To Not Eating for Days 5
Titus 28.04.13 10:40pm
Ironduke
Lincolnshire protesters drone on and on 3
Sinnick 28.04.13 9:28pm
Terry
Liverpool demand investigation after Ivanovic admits "I have been bitten before" 0
Terry 28.04.13 9:16pm
Terry
Black footballers union calls on FA to show tolerance of other cultures

The black footballers union has called on the stuffed shirts of the Football Association to show more tolerance to players from other cultures who have only come to England in order to earn vast sums...

0
Terry 28.04.13 8:46pm
Terry
School of Hard Knocks gains academy status

Officially Britain’s worst school, London’s School of Hard Knocks will forcibly transfer to academy status this summer, according to Department for Education sources. The school which has been...

2
BAJDixon 28.04.13 8:38pm
godly1966
Police in Bradford foil 9/11 style terror plot.

Police in Bradford today release details of a foiled 9/11 style terror plot involving two radicalised Muslims both aged 8. The discovered plans show how the unnamed pair intended use modified paper...

2
Baldiebaldo 28.04.13 6:48pm
Squudge
Boris against Heathrow plans saying he doesn't use aeroplanes to get high 0
Adam Lewis 28.04.13 6:35pm
Adam Lewis
UKIP Accused Of Bribing Tory Party To Slag Them Off, To Boost UKIP Credibility 0
Titus 28.04.13 5:27pm
Titus
Iain Duncan Smith asks fat people to donate food to government 1
custard cream 28.04.13 5:19pm
Squudge
Next 'I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here' to be filmed in Wormwood Scrubs 2
sydalg 28.04.13 4:55pm
Titus