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Bisto kid in hitler youth scandal - 'I was only following odours' 3
Haywood Manley 16.05.12 4:58pm
nostra da mouse
Kenny Dalglish sacked for thinking Andy Carroll is a great player 0
Hooch 16.05.12 3:43pm
Hooch
"Kenny Dalglish ensures me Andy Carroll is a great player" - Roy Hodgson 0
Hooch 16.05.12 3:42pm
Hooch
Plans to move children's programming leaves "next to nothing" in BBC1 schedule

Following reports that programmes made specifically to cater for the attention spans of those under ten will be moved permanently to the CBBC and CBeebies channels, concerns have been raised that...

0
Haywood Manley 16.05.12 1:45pm
Haywood Manley
Writer struggles to describe incident where chicken ran round with head cut off

The much awaited release of the new Emmerdale Farm novel has been delayed a further 3 months as author Lance Parkin searches for a way to describe a poultry decapitation incident in the climatic...

7
Yikes 16.05.12 1:43pm
ianslat
Lord Leveson promoted to Witch finder General 0
Scronnyglonkle 16.05.12 1:19pm
Scronnyglonkle
Rebekah Brooks faces trial by ducking stool

Amidst claims that her arrest is part of a witch hunt, it has been revealed that Rebekah Brooks will face trial by ducking stool. With drowning indicating innocence and floating being a sure sign of...

6
16.05.12 1:02pm
Phone hacking reveals Rebekah Brooks has a holiday home in Salem 3
Scronnyglonkle 16.05.12 12:18pm
RickH
The Truth Hurts: No Briton has as much talent as a dancing dog.

Pudsey to be offered Simon Cowell's job; and, as a treat, Simon Cowell, in gravy...

0
RickH 16.05.12 12:10pm
RickH
Atheists pull ad campaign after spate of members killed in bus accidents

The worldwide trend for atheists to advertise on buses looks set to cease after a study found that 95% of people killed in bus accidents didn’t believe in God. Professor Paul Saunders of Boston...

0
Yikes 16.05.12 11:20am
Yikes
FA to give Joey Barton a slap on wrist, kick up the arse & punch in the face 2
charlies_hat 16.05.12 10:34am
charlies_hat
Rebekah Brooks charged with conspiracy to conceal evidence

The former editor of The Sun and the News of the World was today charged by the Crown Prosecution Service with concealing facts and evidence from the readerships of the two newspapers she edited....

7
Haywood Manley 16.05.12 10:22am
Rowly
Female filmmakers still struggling with Cannes opener 3
Nerys Hughes 16.05.12 10:19am
Sinnick
CEO of Ecover to appear at The Hague on a charge of ethic cleansing 0
charlies_hat 16.05.12 9:56am
charlies_hat
Peer says "ditch outdated imperial units for Olympics"

with no apparent irony. More soon, M’lud...

0
Thor 16.05.12 9:41am
Thor
Schoolboy reveals difference between the Leveson Enquiry & the Culture Secretary

One is a witch hunt, the other is a rich .. ////yes I know it's a dreaded two-liner, but can't work out how to fit it in a ticker limit//...

0
cinquecento 16.05.12 9:04am
cinquecento
Phone hacking scandal continues - red tops paying the price 0
Haywood Manley 16.05.12 8:12am
Haywood Manley
It's not a witch hunt-we've found her. 0
Tomfinger 16.05.12 8:11am
Tomfinger
Pope and Mladic's adopted child Ratko Ratzinger 'not expected to turn out evil' 0
pere floza 16.05.12 8:03am
pere floza
Hollande says plane was not called Grecce Lightning

more bad puns later...

0
Scronnyglonkle 16.05.12 7:41am
Scronnyglonkle
Charlie Brooks regrets calling arrest of wife "witch hunt"

Charlie Brooks, husband of former News International editor Rebekah, has moved quickly to clarify his description of her arrest as a witch hunt. "Of course, I didn't mean that they thought she was a...

1
apepper 16.05.12 6:47am
Thor
deleted 1
Smart Alex 15.05.12 10:33pm
weematt
An idiot’s guide to... Germany.

An idiot’s guide to Germany., Germany is for many an ideal holiday destination, indeed, ask anyone over the age of 80 and they’ll tell you it’s unmissable. Much of Northern Germany consists...

10
Thor 15.05.12 10:03pm
Golgo13
Rebekah Brooks seen buying boil in the bag eye of newt and dog tongue casserole

more toil and trouble soon...

0
Tomfinger 15.05.12 9:16pm
Tomfinger
Paralysed man ponders next move after successful hand op 0
Mandy Lifeboat 15.05.12 8:27pm
Mandy Lifeboat
'Pitbully Elliot': The misunderstood dancing dog that just wants to bite

Cinema fans are braced for the heel-good film of the Summer, as 'Pitbully Elliot' tells the tale of one dancing dog's struggle to be accepted for who he really is. Raised in a northern collie-ery...

3
15.05.12 8:07pm
Skylarking
Greece on slippery slope. Travolta and Newton-John on the skids. 0
Maverick 15.05.12 8:00pm
Maverick
World’s longest cab journey was ‘a shortcut’ insists driver

Two passengers, taken on a 43,000-mile cab journey that lasted 15 months, have been confidently told the ordeal was 'the quickest way to get to Covent Garden from where you were.' by their driver,...

7
Qoxiivi 15.05.12 7:21pm
Haywood Manley
Missing child's parents cause outrage saying Derek Acorah's career is dead

They say they were told by a messenger from the enetrtainment induistry that the TV Clairvoyant is 'not on this planet anymore', but is 'flying with the fairies', and is soon to be reincarnated....

0
Ian Searle 15.05.12 7:04pm
Ian Searle
Sir Alex Ferguson complains about extra time at DFS sale

Manchester United manager, Sir Alex Ferguson, has complained after the DFS sale was extended by 2 hours this weekend. The additional time allowed Manchester City manager, Roberto Mancini, to go into...

3
seymour totti 15.05.12 5:34pm
kga6