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Syria intervention now seems inevitable after UN Inspectors find traces of oil 7
bonjonelson 31.08.13 6:11am
New 'real surgery' undoes the mess of 'plastic surgery' 0
Dumbnews 31.08.13 4:00am
Fears Daily Mail editor has dementia after week goes by without dementia article 2
sydalg 30.08.13 10:48pm
Government appeals for new daft ideas

The government is undertaking an "ask the people" exercise for new policy ideas which they can announce then abandon a few weeks later. "We aren't ashamed to admit that coming up with entirely...

apepper 30.08.13 10:11pm
Trading Standards officers shut down "Invisible Tattoo Parlour"

Trading standards officers in Swindon have closed down a popular tattoo parlour in Swindon High Street which specialized in "invisible tattoos". Swindon Trading Standards officer, Mike Owen,...

AReader 30.08.13 10:10pm
Syria Crisis: "Scratch her eyes out Sharon", demands Prime Minister

Following defeat in the Commons vote over military action against Syria, the Prime Minister has promised to orchestrate a "robust response" to the alleged use of chemical weapons by the Syrian regime...

spaniels 30.08.13 10:05pm
Confusion after Cameron issues new resolution

Prime Minister David Cameron came under fire today for issuing a new resolution on UK participation in military strikes against Assad's regime in Syria. Both Coalition and Opposition MPs complained...

AReader 30.08.13 9:54pm
Celebrities arrested for abuse in the 70s/80s to be questioned by DCI Gene Hunt

Rolf Harris, Dave Lee Travis and a host of other celebrities who have been, or will be, arrested for abusing girls in the 1970s and 1980s, are to be questioned by the leading detective of the time,...

John Wiltshire 30.08.13 9:39pm
Lens Cap
Typing Error Causes Commons Chaos

"This is all very unfortunate" said Prime Minister Cameron yesterday. "We wished the house to debate a government motion stating that 'This house condemns utterly the use of chemical weapons. If...

Titus 30.08.13 9:27pm
Assad to star in 'Who Do You Think You Gassed?' 1
Squudge 30.08.13 9:17pm
Air-rage monk loses Frequent Friar status 1
sydalg 30.08.13 8:51pm
Smart Alex
Man who bought Herman Melville novel found to have a Moby Dick 0
Smart Alex 30.08.13 8:49pm
Smart Alex
Proprietress of Somerset Tourist attraction found to have a Wookey Hole 0
Smart Alex 30.08.13 8:46pm
Smart Alex
UK government suffering from 'aggression fatigue' 2
GrumpyCat 30.08.13 8:45pm
Railways to charge peeping Toms more to travel at peek times 7
Smart Alex 30.08.13 7:27pm
Edinburgh Zoo claims male panda may be pregnant too. More soon. 1
dominic_mcg 30.08.13 6:57pm
'MPs Only Rejected Syria Vote Because They Resented Interrupted Holidays' Claim 3
Titus 30.08.13 5:13pm
French fries to be reinstated on USA restaurant menus 0
Arthur 30.08.13 5:08pm
Only country to ever drop atomic bomb stands firm against use of evil weapons 2
blacklesbianandproudofit 30.08.13 3:06pm
Friesian Cattle Culled by Badger Marksman With No Concept Of Perspective

Mooooooooooore soon...

Flugelbinder 30.08.13 3:01pm
Gibraltar gets ready for Spanish ownership after Cameron vows to protect them 0
simonjmr 30.08.13 2:52pm
Cows form their own militia army in response to repeated delays in badger cull 0
blacklesbianandproudofit 30.08.13 2:42pm
Man found hiding in train toilet only paid bog standard fair 4
davetwojackets 30.08.13 12:59pm
George Cloony and David Cameron for Bond Film.

George Cloony admitted to wanting the role of Drax in forthcoming remake of the James Bond movie Moonraker He said "I have put considerable amounts of time and money into this project. The role has...

Ian Collier 30.08.13 12:55pm
Ian Collier
UK Government publishes Parliament recall schedule

The Government has just published a schedule for future world crises which will trigger the recall of parliament in order to allow MPs to plan their holidays better. Similar to the new “Forward...

rogerg 30.08.13 12:09pm
Met Police arrest entire 1970s. 4
Sfox 30.08.13 12:04pm
‘Lame Duck’ Cameron considers Rio Paralympics

Prime Minister David Cameron is weighing up his chances for the 2016 Paralympics in Rio since last night’s vote on Syria qualified him to participate in the recently announced ‘Lame Duck’...

cinnahmon 30.08.13 11:54am
Assad calls for military action in UK after badger cull details leaked 0
simonjmr 30.08.13 11:54am
Badger Cull Causes Potato Price Increase

The use of potatoes to bait Badgers has led to an alarming increase in the price of spuds.., A Government spokesman defended the use of spuds in the practice because "Everybody knows, Badger loves...

Flugelbinder 30.08.13 11:13am
Spending spree at Arsenal finally begins as Wenger buys Galaxy McFlurry

The rumoured summer spending spree at Arsenal looks set to be underway at last as manager Arsene Wenger was spotted buying a Galaxy Caramel McFlurry at a McDonalds near the Emirates Stadium. With...

Spartacus 30.08.13 10:59am
Midfield Diamond