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Locksmiths company to make key appointment 0
AReader 01.09.13 8:16am
US intelligence agencies forced to disclose their 'porn stash'

The Washington Post has revealed the financial breakdown of the CIA & NSA's 'black budget' but within that is a smaller, more explicit, 'blue budget'. A significant proportion of the $52.6bn set...

Wrenfoe 01.09.13 7:43am
Existentialist philosopher to appear on ‘Why do you think you are?’ 7
FOAD 31.08.13 11:27pm
Cameron will press on with plans to bomb his way to election victory. More soon. 0
deskpilot3 31.08.13 11:07pm
whoops 7
Ian Searle 31.08.13 9:22pm
Paddy Berzinski
Rolf Harris to appear on new TV show - 'How Long Do You Think I'll Get?' 2
custard cream 31.08.13 9:20pm
LOL Creator To Sue Internet

When Devizes housewife Wendy Greenspan casually commented on an internet article she'd read twelve years ago that made her laugh out loud, she had no idea that she was about to start a terrible...

Paddy Berzinski 31.08.13 9:20pm
Paddy Berzinski
Time lord to appear on When Do You Think You Are

Hat tip to FOAD...

Smart Alex 31.08.13 6:56pm
Arsenal club shop criticised for range of “Unquenchables” figurines

In a vain attempt to gather more cash for the transfer coffers, the clubshop owner has launched the new “Unquenchables” figurine range of former players. Currently only the Kenny Sansom, Paul...

brownpaperreporter 31.08.13 5:29pm
Man facing vegetable sex charges described as being "up beet" 5
sydalg 31.08.13 5:08pm
David Blunkett cornered by benefits fraud investigators after car chase 1
sydalg 31.08.13 3:05pm
Review of One Direction: This Is Us.

Despite an interesting Mise En Scéne that draws inspiration from German Expressionism, Morgan Spurlock's dystopian musical suffers from a muddled plot and poor characterization. While his decision...

Hooch 31.08.13 2:17pm
The number of celebrities with two forenames leads to shortage of new baby names

George Michael, Steve Martin and Meg Ryan deny they have been selfish in having two forenames, but a survey commissioned by Harper Seven Beckham, Zowie Bowie and Peaches Geldolf suggests that the...

Ian Searle 31.08.13 1:50pm
Ian Searle
France brands Britain as 'Chip-eating surrender monkeys' over Syria.

President Hollande has urged the population to boycott British goods, before realising they already refuse to buy anything from us anyway. He said the proud French military would stand shoulder to...

MADJEZ 31.08.13 1:29pm
Nigel Kennedy Proms appearance "accident waiting to happen". 0
Drylaw 31.08.13 1:21pm
'Concussion not good for you' - shocks scientists

The National Football League (NFL) has made a discovery that has sent the medical world into confusion. Since 1920, thousands of American footballers haven taken part in an elaborate experiment to...

Wrenfoe 31.08.13 9:33am
Paddy Berzinski
Storm As Parliament Rejects Armed Strikes Against Apostrophe Abusers 5
Titus 31.08.13 9:23am
Daily Mail apologises for printing non-scary photo of Jimmy Savile... 1
Tripod 31.08.13 7:52am
Britain To Sell Super Puma Helicopters To President Assad

"Result" says Cameron "We get to inflict devastating casualties on his regime without having to commit any of our armed forces or pissing off MPs, we get rid of some crap helicopters, and we get...

Titus 31.08.13 7:27am
Syria intervention now seems inevitable after UN Inspectors find traces of oil 7
bonjonelson 31.08.13 6:11am
New 'real surgery' undoes the mess of 'plastic surgery' 0
Dumbnews 31.08.13 4:00am
Fears Daily Mail editor has dementia after week goes by without dementia article 2
sydalg 30.08.13 10:48pm
Government appeals for new daft ideas

The government is undertaking an "ask the people" exercise for new policy ideas which they can announce then abandon a few weeks later. "We aren't ashamed to admit that coming up with entirely...

apepper 30.08.13 10:11pm
Trading Standards officers shut down "Invisible Tattoo Parlour"

Trading standards officers in Swindon have closed down a popular tattoo parlour in Swindon High Street which specialized in "invisible tattoos". Swindon Trading Standards officer, Mike Owen,...

AReader 30.08.13 10:10pm
Syria Crisis: "Scratch her eyes out Sharon", demands Prime Minister

Following defeat in the Commons vote over military action against Syria, the Prime Minister has promised to orchestrate a "robust response" to the alleged use of chemical weapons by the Syrian regime...

spaniels 30.08.13 10:05pm
Confusion after Cameron issues new resolution

Prime Minister David Cameron came under fire today for issuing a new resolution on UK participation in military strikes against Assad's regime in Syria. Both Coalition and Opposition MPs complained...

AReader 30.08.13 9:54pm
Celebrities arrested for abuse in the 70s/80s to be questioned by DCI Gene Hunt

Rolf Harris, Dave Lee Travis and a host of other celebrities who have been, or will be, arrested for abusing girls in the 1970s and 1980s, are to be questioned by the leading detective of the time,...

John Wiltshire 30.08.13 9:39pm
Lens Cap
Typing Error Causes Commons Chaos

"This is all very unfortunate" said Prime Minister Cameron yesterday. "We wished the house to debate a government motion stating that 'This house condemns utterly the use of chemical weapons. If...

Titus 30.08.13 9:27pm
Assad to star in 'Who Do You Think You Gassed?' 1
Squudge 30.08.13 9:17pm
Air-rage monk loses Frequent Friar status 1
sydalg 30.08.13 8:51pm
Smart Alex