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Rhyming slang irony as 'Wanker' becomes polite version of 'Merchant Banker' 3
Ironduke 3 years
Police develop new "Cafetiere-ing" tactic for Middle-Class Demonstrations. 2
BillyBitzer 3 years
Boat Race cancelled after rowers join the London protests 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years
"LOL with Jeremy Paxman" commissioned by the BBC 4
Danny 3 years

In an attempt to win the ratings war of hard-hitting talk shows the BBC has commissioned a show to go head to head with "OMG with Peaches Geldof"...

Algeria and Tunisia complain of extra aircraft activity because of no fly zone 0
Basil_B 3 years

Government representatives of Tunisia and Algeria collectively complained today over the extra noise pollution caused by the increased air activity over their respective countries due to the enforced...

'Anyone offered kebab meat in suspicious circumstances asked to contact police' 3
Ironduke 3 years

Frozen 18kg kebab stolen from Trowbridge takeaway Equipment taken in takeaway raid Thieves have stolen an 18kg (40lb) frozen kebab from a takeaway outlet at Trowbridge railway station. The massive...

Medical News: Premature Ejaculation Awareness Week will be early this year. 3
be reasonable 3 years
RyanAir Buyout Nasa 0
gk 3 years

In a shock announcement, Barack Obama has admitted that he has sold the government funded institute NASA to the Irish budget airline RyanAir. The American President claims that the space institute...

Thanks to Osborne, petrol goes down from 135p to 139p a litre 6
John Wiltshire 3 years

Flags flew across the nation as grateful motorists celebrated the slashing of petrol prices from an exorbitant 135p a litre to an incredible 139p or even 140p., Opinion was unanimous that this was...

Clegg to save UK economy say Treasury papers 0
Mrblacker 3 years

The future of the entire UK economy rests on the shoulders of the Lib Dem leader and Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg, according to leaked papers from the Treasury. The documents show that George...

Syrians demand change from regime as they ask Bashar alAssad change for a fiver 0
Basil_B 3 years
EU rules only sprouts growen in Belgium can be called 'Brussels' 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Film career discovered buried in the footnotes of Elizabeth Taylor's biography 0
ronseal 3 years

New revelations have come to light that reality matrimony star Elizabeth Taylor, famous for marrying Richard Burton and putting up with Michael Jackson, found time to star in some films...

UK disaster relief team unable to help as Japan had 'wrong kind of Tsunami' 0
ronseal 3 years

A crack team of British disaster relief experts, the cream of the elite forces trusted to keep our roads, railways and airports working, is to be despatched to Japan - once the next set of back to...

Derrick Bird Unlawfully Killed 12 people, Inquest rules 0
Ironduke 3 years

well no shit. I thought he'd been granted an EU shotgun execution quota, strictly limited to a dozen....

Tramps go multi-lingual for London Olympics 3
Mrblacker 3 years

The organisers of the London Olympics have confirmed they're to offer every person living rough on the streets of the capital, free language lessons ahead of the opening of the games in 2012. Common...

"You wouldn't get a white person doing something like that." 2
greg various 3 years

"Calling themselves Delroy."...

British Search-and-Rescue team found alive in Leicester 2
malgor 3 years

Six specialist search-and-rescue operatives from the UK, who set out for Southern Italy more than two weeks ago, have been found ‘weak but in good spirits’ in a Tesco car park in Leicester. ...

F1 cars to start with a wet coat of paint, to enhance the excitement 9
greg various 3 years

guy who comes last to be tied to the back of winner's car and dragged round the track on the victory lap...

Revolutionary forces unite in Syria and Yemen 0
Ironduke 3 years

to form Semen Liberation Front...

Quality of landing dependent on average cost of ticket for flight 1
3 years

A study released today has proved that the average price for a plane ticket is directly proportional to the quality of the landing. The study has taken over a year to conduct with researchers having...

Church finds product placement not all its cracked up to be 6
brownpaperreporter 3 years

All Souls Church, Dudley were initially overjoyed at the injection of much needed cash by IKEA for their Easter services and parade However their joy was short-lived as they found that the lifesize...

French Air Force shoot down plane. First since 1914. 12
MADJEZ 3 years
Shell to replace petrol pump price gauge with random number generator 1
brownpaperreporter 3 years

that never drops below 140...

UN declares "No Pun" zone for satirical websites. 4
BillyBitzer 3 years

More soon…...

Osborne gets carried away with “whole hawk thing” 2
NewSuburbanDad 3 years

The Chancellor confirmed today that watching oil companies like a hawk meant “jolly well acting like one”. Perched on David Cameron’s forearm during Prime Minister’s questions, Osborne made...

Supermoon blamed for petrol price increase. 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years
Flt Lt Geoff Miller, RAF (Libyan Ops), The Charismatic but Greasy-Haired, 3
3 years

Furtive, Lurking 42 Year-Old has just been designated 'Mission Creep' for Libya...

Scrabble players welcome inclusion of FYI, LOL, and OMG in the OED. 1
Ian Searle 3 years
Killed-off‘Archers’ actor unlikely to repeat Radio Actor of Year success in 2012 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years