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Tibetan spiritual leader to wed : Dalai Mail exclusive 3
Drylaw 23.06.12 9:36pm
Scroat
McGuinness' voice must be dubbed by an actor when he meets the Queen 0
bonjonelson 23.06.12 8:55pm
bonjonelson
Queen to present McGuinness with ticking "clock" in parcel

The Queen is to present former IRA commander Martin McGuinness with a symbolic ticking parcel. Precision built by specialist MI5 "clock-makers", the time-piece is described as the "ultimate alarm...

1
apepper 23.06.12 8:29pm
dvo4fun
Tots to learn politics with new BBC series of "Dimblebeebies"

Under fives are to have their  own BBC current affairs programmes, made by the producers of In the Night Garden and Teletubbies.  The Dimblebeebies are a pair of brothers who are far from dim....

3
nickb 23.06.12 7:06pm
Skylarking
Rooney lashes out at Oxlade-Chamberlain for '..calling Roy Hodgson a Polyglot!'

Because "The gaffer shouldn't have to put up with language like that from anyone!" according to the follically augmented toe-brained simian simpleton...

0
Jammydodgers 23.06.12 3:54pm
Jammydodgers
Duke of Edinburgh seen buying Joy Buzzer in preparation for McGuinness handshake 0
Nails UK 23.06.12 3:48pm
Nails UK
Innuendo Watchdog To Be Launched As Part of Cameron's 'Big Society'

An independent governing body that will monitor practitioners of smut-laden innuendo is to be launched later this year as part of a government scheme to "reinstate a basal level of moral decency in...

3
TiffindeVere 23.06.12 3:37pm
Nunnion Splendacular
Noel Deals Blow To Ofcom

Neat-bearded celebrity presenter, Noel Edmonds, was feeling a great deal better today following an Ofcom ruling that found him not guilty of misrepresentation during the hosting of his hit Channel 4...

0
Duff 23.06.12 3:18pm
Duff
Network Rail renames flooded West Coast line, "The train flume". More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.06.12 3:12pm
dominic_mcg
NatWest fix computer erro$£$£(2,,,.

More to $£"!¬(")...

0
apepper 23.06.12 2:39pm
apepper
John Terry agrees to shake Queen's hand despite her being 'a bit foreign'.

John Terry agrees to shake Queen's hand despite her being 'a bit foreign'...

0
monty 23.06.12 12:18pm
monty
IOW festival boss refuses refunds. Says terms are bog standard for industry. 0
weematt 23.06.12 10:59am
weematt
Queen to shake McGuiness' hand "If he rinsed after last piss" says Palace 4
dvo4fun 23.06.12 10:41am
weematt
Kofi Annan "This is just getting Syria and Syria"

more soon. Is my coat over there?...

0
dvo4fun 23.06.12 10:07am
dvo4fun
Dalai Lama disappointed by lack of virgins in Inverness. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.06.12 9:50am
dominic_mcg
Many still critical condition after "day of inaction" from homeopathic doctors

Some hospitals around the country are close to meltdown as they struggle to deal with the aftermath of the recent one day strike by homeopathic doctors. Homeopaths are angry at changes to their...

3
grumblechops 23.06.12 9:46am
dvo4fun
Isle of Wight residents flee as 4 wheeled beasts rise from the mud. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.06.12 9:15am
dominic_mcg
Suicide Bombers Greeted In Paradise By 72 "Sturgeons" After Koran Typo 1
TiffindeVere 23.06.12 9:03am
Nunnion Splendacular
More bad news for Jimmy Carr as he receives backing from Jim Davidson 0
medici2471 23.06.12 8:37am
medici2471
Patent Office "not shiny enough" says report 0
nickb 23.06.12 7:48am
nickb
The Prodigy recalled over fire risk 0
bonjonelson 23.06.12 7:34am
bonjonelson
Germany kick Greece out of Europe

More later...

0
Ian 23.06.12 6:20am
Ian
American Gun Nut Ted Nugent Finds A Good Hunting Buddy In Cannibal Luka Magnotta

Ted Nugent, the flaming redneck of rock and gun fame, who was most recently in the news for 'suggesting' that Obama and his Cabinet be beheaded, has found himself a new hunting buddy. “That damn...

0
23.06.12 1:26am
Sir Alan Sugar's New Apprentice Sacked for Failing to Give "120%"

A spokesman for Sugar’s company revealed this morning that Lord Sugar “will not be collaborating with 2012 Apprentice Winner Ricky Martin” on the proposed joint-venture that constituted the...

3
TiffindeVere 23.06.12 12:07am
dvo4fun
Moody downgrades Blood Banks from B plus to O negative 3
Ian Searle 22.06.12 10:59pm
JETFAB
Latently Homosexual Bees Suffering Allergies "Come Out In Hives" 2
TiffindeVere 22.06.12 10:54pm
JETFAB
Psychiatrist prescribes new anti-depressant called ice-cream 1
Dumbnews 22.06.12 10:05pm
TiffindeVere
"Gordon Ramsay Actually Ronald McDonald in Disguise" claims Michael Winner 0
TiffindeVere 22.06.12 10:04pm
TiffindeVere
"Nigella Lawson Pads Her Bra With Meringues" claims Delia 0
TiffindeVere 22.06.12 10:01pm
TiffindeVere
"Stevie Wonder Not Blind, Just A Brazen Liar" Claims Andrea Boccelli 0
TiffindeVere 22.06.12 9:57pm
TiffindeVere