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Egyptian President assures Christians and women they will be persecuted fairly. 5
Al OPecia 25.06.12 1:28pm
cinquecento
Police investigate mystery disappearance of England flags from millions of cars

Police up and down the UK are investigating the mass disappearance of England flags that where once attached to cars. The mysterious multi-theft happened at about 22:25 on Sunday evening. A...

4
Perks 25.06.12 12:05pm
Cymraeg
England Regains Form after Jittery Start

There must have been a lot of butterflies in English stomachs last night before the kick-off against Italy, as disgruntled fans whose expectations had been dashed by seeing their team get through the...

3
Cymraeg 25.06.12 11:58am
dvo4fun
British women's waists too big say short-armed men 0
roybland 25.06.12 11:15am
roybland
Keith Chegwin Emerges From Hiding And Vows To Get Even With Edmonds

Madcap 70s TV star Keith Chegwin has emerged from a two day self-imposed bout of hiding and in a sensational rant blamed it all on his erstwhile pal, Noel Edmonds and his obsession on playing...

0
Duff 25.06.12 10:11am
Duff
Cameron Says Jimmy Carr Made A ‘Fair Call’

Jimmy Carr called the PM a f****ing c**t and the Prime Minister surprisingly appears to agree., In an unprecedented turn of honesty David Cameron took time out from extremely vitally important talks...

0
daneade 25.06.12 9:56am
daneade
"But athletics hasn't been popular since Linford Christie!", England realises.

Track and field sports are about as nationally relevant as the original Karate Kid film, England suddenly realised yesterday. As another GBP1,000,000 was transferred to the bank account of the...

0
barrowboy 25.06.12 9:55am
barrowboy
Cameron admits Lonesome George has been sluggish and slow paced for last 2 years 0
charlies_hat 25.06.12 9:44am
charlies_hat
Shock as mediocre team that can't take penalties loses on penalties 0
Oxbridge 25.06.12 9:43am
Oxbridge
England do well against Italy until forced to kick the ball forwards 0
Midfield Diamond 25.06.12 9:19am
Midfield Diamond
Egyptian president's success attributed to popular song by Duffy 0
Sinnick 25.06.12 8:59am
Sinnick
Euro banknotes to be printed on Greece-proof paper 0
jimmydodger 25.06.12 8:54am
jimmydodger
RBS getting back to normal operations, fears FSA 0
cinquecento 25.06.12 8:48am
cinquecento
Kate downgraded to 8th in line to the throne in early morning toilet queue. 0
Tomfinger 25.06.12 8:45am
Tomfinger
Urge to interview people early indication of Parkinson's

Scientists have determined that Parkinson's disease can be diagnosed early from a compulsion to conduct interviews, advertise life insurance or talk about Geoffrey Boycott...

0
apepper 25.06.12 7:27am
apepper
Michael Jackson's tombstone "getting whiter" 4
grumblechops 25.06.12 7:20am
charlies_hat
Egypt leader Mohammed Morrissey says 'Please please let me get what I want' 0
MADJEZ 25.06.12 7:04am
MADJEZ
Old Woman who lives in a shoe to loose her housing benefit

She told a reporter she has so many children she doesn't know what to do...

0
Ian Searle 25.06.12 6:14am
Ian Searle
Contributor Duff Accuses Fellow Newsbiscuit Writers Of Cronyism

In a staggering outburst earlier today Newsbiscuit contributor, Duff, has hit out at what he sees as blatant cronyism and the wholesale formation of little cliques all over the popular online...

12
Duff 24.06.12 10:49pm
FlashArry
England win in competition to not get stuffed by the Germans : Italians furious 0
FlashArry 24.06.12 10:24pm
FlashArry
Hosepipe ban inspectors work slowed by flooding

Government inspectors charged with enforcing the hosepipe ban have complained that flooding has disrupted their work; "We've had to use frogmen to check that hosepipes aren't being turned on.",...

1
apepper 24.06.12 10:20pm
Scitech77
Shock as team who've lost 26 out of 27 International tournaments knocked out.

More whining soon...

1
MADJEZ 24.06.12 10:19pm
FlashArry
Nat West 'we're trying our hardest but to be frank we don't give a fuck'

Expect bumper profits soon...

0
MADJEZ 24.06.12 10:07pm
MADJEZ
UK deluged by tidal wave of regional news teams

With large parts of the country on flood-alert besieged householders have been recounting their horror as they opened their doors and met an unstoppable river of regional news teams. “They were on...

11
Mandy Lifeboat 24.06.12 10:02pm
dvo4fun
Prince Charles may be forced to move back in with his parents 0
nickb 24.06.12 10:01pm
nickb
RBS software cock up a real threat to cancelling Bank Holidays claims BBA 0
simonjmr 24.06.12 9:48pm
simonjmr
Homeopath-psychopaths "a little bit bonkers" 0
nickb 24.06.12 9:43pm
nickb
Watching England play Italy is like watching Italy play 0
Hooch 24.06.12 9:23pm
Hooch
Fears that Sunday opening may give public ideas about future service by banks

Banking chiefs fear that Sunday's opening of branches of NatWest, RBS and Ulster Bank may have given customers the idea that for the first time in banking history UK banks are to start offering a...

0
roybland 24.06.12 8:27pm
roybland
New Tesco Creates High Skill Jobs in GlowBall Delivery & Steak Holder Enhancing

Tesco has answered its critics by creating a number of high skilled jobs at its new hypermarket, including a Glow Ball Delivery Executive, a SteakHolder Engagement Evangelist and a Key strategist....

2
ronseal 24.06.12 7:10pm
dvo4fun