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Convicted arsonists to be used to keep Olympic Torch lit on its 70 day UK relay 0
simonjmr 3 years
Tea caddie in hot water for black coffee remark 0
medici2471 3 years
"No junk male", only eunuchs need apply 0
medici2471 3 years
News from Columbia: Farc quits 2
Skylarking 3 years
Potato lover says his wife 'scrubs up great' 2
kga6 3 years
BBC admit they have "no idea" how to finish Eastenders 5
grumblechops 3 years

After a tense meeting between scriptwriters and chief executives, the BBC today conceded they still had "no workable plan" to conclude long-running money pit, Eastenders. The programme began in 1985...

BA Was a CA in the TA 0
victimms 3 years

It has been revealed that B.A. Baracus, one of the stars of The A Team, never was an ex-Vietnam veteran. Bryan Amis, his real name, was in fact a Careers Advisor for the British Territorial Army....

The government's secret plan to rehabilitate prisoners revealed. 2
fuzzy 3 years

The governments secret plan to rehabilitate prisoner was revealed last night when, Oliver Letwin known as "brains" by other cabinet members, mistakenly left a secret government briefing paper in a...

UK firework displays provide much needed boost to Chinese economy 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Caddie escapes punishment, Woods confirms "My ass is in fact black" 0
medici2471 3 years
Most Scottish Tories "not sure what lesbians actually do" 6
nickb 3 years

Despite electing Britain's first openly gay female political leader, three out of the four Scottish Conservative party members say they are ignorant about the lives of lesbians. In an unusually...

Metropolitan Police finally shoot someone nobody likes 1
gaijintendo 3 years

"It has taken years of hard work" said Jim McBoabie, "but we think we got away with it this time"...

Stavros Flatley deny responsibity for Greek and Irish debt crisis 0
antharrison 3 years
English pilot 'ejaculated over North Sea' say Deutsche Coastguard 0
vertical 3 years

ein mekanical gerfunken, it voss difikult to undershtend ja...

Jimmy Savile's body lying in a state. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Ferguson: '25 years? There's at least another 2 years left plus stoppage time... 1
ianslat 3 years

by my watch'...

Joe Frazier regrets Smokin' 0
arthurminnit 3 years
Trip Advisor to review hallucinogenic drugs 4
nickb 3 years

Like, more soon...

13 year old shot dead copying CD, as armed guards stop piracy 7
Perks 3 years
Nigerian Ex-minister caught with large sum of Cash 4
reforse 3 years

Nigerian Ex Finance Minister Colonel Ukwe Unchogo was today caught trying to board British Airways flight BA4235 to Heathrow today at Lagos airport with over two hundred million US Dollars in cash in...

Israeli and Palestinian rocket displays receive mixed reaction 1
Le Creuset Fiend 3 years

More for the forseeable future (Surely this must have been done before?)...

Darth Vader Joins Fathers for Justice 22
Quaz 3 years

The organisation “Fathers for Justice” gained a high profile new member today as Darth Vader attended their Annual General Meeting and recounted the harrowing story of how he lost contact with...

NewsBiscuit to change name to News Cake for improved tax status. 1
godly1966 3 years

It worked for McVities...

Greece to become bronze age theme park... 0
Immunis 3 years

'It was all going well for us until iron and Italy were discovered' says PM. The Greek parliament will soon be announcing their plans to drop out of the Euro, the EC and post industrial life with a...

Old Trafford Marks 25 Years Service by Opening "The Referees Association Stand" 2
Mathna 3 years
Archbishop who lives in a palace criticises top executives... 0
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

for ‘taking a lot of money for doing nothing’...

Tyre on a rope named in Rooney's honour 2
beau-jolly 3 years
Robin Hood tax opposed by Friar Tuck 1
nickb 3 years
Ex Kwiksave worker now painting road signs 1
beau-jolly 3 years

John Terry leaves Chelsea to become Tiger Wood's new caddie. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years