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Giant sponge dropped on Somerset

The world's largest sponge was dramatically dropped onto Somerset last night by the Environment Agency's specialist aerial bombardment unit. Officials have reportedly been instructed by Ministers to...

3
BAJDixon 04.02.14 9:31am
Son of Barnabas
An addict writes: my life without Russell Brand.

I'm clean now. As clean as I'll ever be. It's been three months and seventeen days since I last had a 'fix.' Sure, I've been tempted; after all, I read the Guardian, so Brand is available all the...

0
FOAD 04.02.14 9:15am
FOAD
Tribe of Native Americans turned away from restaurant despite having reservation

Been done?...

2
Smart Alex 04.02.14 9:09am
BewsNiscuit
'Noah' most popular boys' name in Somerset 0
Dick Everyman 04.02.14 8:47am
Dick Everyman
Somerset Levels level levellest since records began 0
Idiot 04.02.14 8:42am
Idiot
Universities to change science degree award to BA (Hons)

The minister for science and reducing education, Mr Wallets, is delighted to announce that the new model for UK science policy is taking effect. Mr Wallets was visiting Fogthorn College this week to...

1
Robert Koch 04.02.14 8:42am
Dick Everyman
Actor’s untimely death ‘tragically’ leaves no work for understudies

While the Hollywood community is still coming to terms with the sad demise of Philip Seymour Hoffman, struggling movie stars have had to contend with the shock that The Hunger Games franchise will...

2
Wrenfoe 04.02.14 8:21am
Wrenfoe
Eskimos down to seven words for snow due to global warming 1
sydalg 04.02.14 5:41am
Lindy Moone
World's strongest man prime event to be opening a jar of salsa 0
Dumbnews 04.02.14 4:38am
Dumbnews
Canary shaped like Poland increasing nervous about cat that looks like Hitler 0
sydalg 04.02.14 1:17am
sydalg
Environment Agency to float on the stock market 3
Kevin the Swan 04.02.14 12:10am
FOAD
Bible ceases print edition, now beamed straight into people's heads by God

The environmental lobby is celebrating today as the last hard copy edition of the Word of God rolls off the press. It is estimated that the paper alone was costing the planet an acre of trees a day....

2
sydalg 03.02.14 9:52pm
electrelane
Tories 'running out of people to call Marxist'.

Reports were unfolding of a crisis in the Tory party this afternoon, after claims of there being a severe shortage of people who they haven't already upset by referring to them as 'Marxists'. Having...

1
electrelane 03.02.14 8:02pm
Bigglesworth
'No lasting damage done in Somerset' says thankful Environment Minister

Owen Patterson’s valet claims it took him nearly an hour to polish the Environment Minister’s brogues following his recent visit to the Somerset flood plains., The valet told the Commons Expense...

7
Gerontius 03.02.14 6:42pm
Jesus H
SNP aims high to win Scottish independence.

Health was today thrust firmly to the forefront of the campaign for Scottish Independence by SNP leader Alex Salmond. In a press conference at a chip shop in Glasgow he announced that as soon...

5
godly1966 03.02.14 6:12pm
AReader
Contrary Barber sacked for Splitting Hairs! 0
Njinski 03.02.14 5:24pm
Njinski
Astrologer predicts we'll "see less Hoffman" in 2014 0
sydalg 03.02.14 5:20pm
sydalg
Govesworth he sa, mak state skools like st custards chiz

Michael govesworth the educashun secretry hav told everybode he wants to brake the 'Berlin Wall' between state skools and his alma mater st custards which was founded by a mad man in 1836. This could...

1
Oxbridge 03.02.14 5:17pm
electrelane
Seymour Hoffmans family touched as stars spend seconds Tweeting 'OMG/WTF'. 1
MADJEZ 03.02.14 5:14pm
rob box
Oops 2
sydalg 03.02.14 5:01pm
sydalg
Newsbiscuit to be renamed Govebiscuit 0
james_doc 03.02.14 5:00pm
james_doc
Gove to test children 'before birth'

Michael Gove has caused controversy with new plans to test embryos on basic skills. The under-fire education secretary said of the plans, 'it is vitally important that we do not let our children fall...

0
electrelane 03.02.14 4:51pm
electrelane
Manuel Pellegrini to manage England cricket team and UK economy in spare time 0
farmer giles 03.02.14 4:46pm
farmer giles
Chuckle Brother in Menage a Trois with DLT

To me, to you, etc...

0
james_doc 03.02.14 4:29pm
james_doc
David Cameron Completes Necknomination

Less than 24 hours after being nominated by Ken Clarke, Prime Minister David Cameron has taken to Facebook to complete his necknomination - as is required in the rapidly viral game on the social...

0
james_doc 03.02.14 4:22pm
james_doc
Giles - 'I'm rubbish enough to coach England'

Ashley Giles hit out angrily at critics earlier today who suggested that he wasn't a bad enough cricketer to coach the England team. Giles was stung by claims that he was 'too good' to maintain...

3
electrelane 03.02.14 4:02pm
custard cream
It's a no to Yeo as local Tories tell ex Minister to go 0
custard cream 03.02.14 3:59pm
custard cream
Minister urges noisy lovers to "stop moaning" 0
sydalg 03.02.14 3:54pm
sydalg
Cameron, Clegg and Osborne to star in new C4 documentary, ‘The Unrelateables’

Channel 4 have announced their Spring schedule today, confirming that viewers will be treated to a unique documentary that explores the gap in lifestyles between MPs and 'regular people' ‘The...

0
Jesus H 03.02.14 3:20pm
Jesus H
Tube strike welcomed by Ed Balls: "Economic recovery? I don't think so!"

The breakdown of last minute talks between London Mayor Boris Johnson and RMT union leader Bob Crow were hailed as "Fantastic news" by Shadow Chancellor Ed Balls this afternoon. The 48 hour tube...

0
Son of Barnabas 03.02.14 3:02pm
Son of Barnabas