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Western governments consider air strikes against London newsagent 1
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

Foreign Secretary William Hague has chaired an emergency meeting of Western governments in London to try to agree a programme of Western air strikes against Sanjeev Patel, 53, a newsagent from west...

Cameron sends Clegg and Hague on fact-finding tour of Japan's nuclear plants 1
John Wiltshire 3 years

David Cameron announced today that he is sending Nick Clegg and William Hague on a fact-finding tour of Japan's nuclear power stations., 'It's vitally important,' he said, 'that we find out the...

2012 TICKET TOUTS ALREADY SELLING AT UP TO 90% BELOW LIST PRICE 0
3 years
Residents of Kenyan slum run sponsored fast to raise awareness about pet obesity 2
Danny 3 years

The shocking study by the PDSA that over a third of dogs in the UK are overweight, and half will be overwidght by 2012, has prompted people in Kibera slum to help raise awareness on the dangers of...

Government cuts - homeless to be issued with cats, rather than dogs 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

In a move which will no doubt cheer the hearts of all right-thinking people, David Cameron has announced that from the beginning of April, homeless people will be issued with a cat as a companion,...

Michael Sheen to star in biopic "What Charlie, Sheen did next?" 0
simonjmr 3 years
Night time blackout on Midsomer streets. DCI Barnaby sent to make an arrest. 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Rod Stewart to play a series of controversial naked charity concerts... 0
AJT 3 years

The aim is to raise funds for the Japanese families displaced due to the radiation leaks from the Fukushima Daiichi plant. The series of live shows will be called "The Exposed Rod"...

Cheltenham Festival gate-crashed by confused hippies 0
greg various 3 years

with odds at 33 to 1...

Ray Davies asked to consider renaming 2011 Meltdown festival. 0
simonjmr 3 years
Government to introduce Unnecessary Signs Ahead road sign - 2 30
John Wiltshire 3 years

The government has announced that a new road sign will shortly be appearing on Britain's roads, warning motorists of unnecessary signs ahead., The Transport minister, Keith Brown, said at a press...

Arsey Gangsta sought after drive by sh*ting 0
3 years
After making millions with the help of slum dwellers Danny Boyle gives back 0
markmypaper 3 years

to the families,with 5 fire extinguishers and a safety pamphlet from The top fire station in Glasgow.He admits he is no hero and it's what any Scotsman that had exploited children and had millions...

Writer wants to join in the fun but feels it would be a drive by mooting 0
markmypaper 3 years
Owl sought after fly-by hooting 2
Tammy Flugh 3 years
Obama Wins Nobel Peace Prize for His Inaction in Middle East 1
Q William Bacon 3 years

U.S. President Barack Obama received the 2011 Nobel Peace Prize, his second, at a ceremony in Oslo. As is tradition, the King of Norway was in attendance. In accepting the award, Mr. Obama said,...

Proud father-to-be David Beckham reveals "It's a baby!". 0
flossie mcjava 3 years
John Terry to get England captaincy back 0
riesler 3 years

Manager Fabio Capello said "It's OK, he had his fingers crossed when he shagged Wayne Bridge's ex, so that means after a year he has unshagged her. In Italy we call it the Berlusconi Rule"...

Live action version of Godzilla now much closer, claim Japanese scientists 1
Iamthestig 3 years
Suspicions grow about the census question on happiness... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

as the only permitted answers are:, a) happy,, b) very happy,, c) happy with the first past the post election system,, d) very happy sacking overpaid public servants and, e) ludicrously happy...

Daily Mail 'still trying to find cancer, house price angle' on Japan earthquake 3
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

[i]Daily Mail[/i] reporters are working 'round the clock' to identify a link between the Japanese earthquake and either cancer, house prices or political correctness, the paper's editor has said....

Greengrocer arrested after drive-by fruiting. 1
mr blue 3 years
Wenger bids for two keepers; accidentally buys Lehman Brothers. 0
tl72uk 3 years
Police search for Ed Miliband continues - no reports of any sightings... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

for over three months now. No-one is helping police with their enquiries...

Excitable Osborne is counting down to the new Age of Austerity... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

because on April 1st we will finally leave behind the bloated, overblown and wasteful budgets of the last Government, and we can live on gruel and old newspaper casserole until we get the next...

Clegg to enter a coalition with the rest of his party 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Clegg's prayers answered by disasters in Libya and Japan... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

avoiding any embarrassing press coversge of the Lib Dem spring conference...

Kerry Katona misses out again at Crufts 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Hungry Imam modifies stance against ham 3
Genghis Cohen 3 years
Ronco releases Osama Bin Laden video compilation "Now That's What I Call Jihad" 1
ronseal 3 years