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Crowd cheering with heavy irony ‘similar to normal cheering’ claims audiologist. 0
malgor 3 years
Belgian students conclusively prove that 'Intelligent Design' theory is wrong. 0
Griffin 3 years
Sales in balls rebound after harsh weather 0
virtuallywill 3 years

more boing later...

Police cuts - residents of Midsomer are worried 2
John Wiltshire 3 years

Residents of the county of Midsomer expressed concern at the possible cuts in police numbers., 'As it is there's only 2 detectives and one pathologist to cover the whole county,' said one lady who...

'I don't care if no-one buys my new album' Geldof tells all the news media 3
John Wiltshire 3 years

Bob Geldof today began a week-long round of media interviews about his new album, declaring that he 'doesn't care' if no-one buys his new album 'How To Compose Popular Songs that Will Sell.', 'It...

'Intelligent' Belgian students tried to fly with Ryanair. 2
Ostsee 3 years
ADRIAN CHILES FACES LIFE BAN FROM 'BENNY HILL LOOKALIKE' COMPETITIONS 0
3 years

Following five consecutive wins during it's five year life, the Committee of the Little Dimpton Benny Hill Lookalike Competition has unanimously voted for a life ban due to "..an uncanny likeness".,...

Lakeland Mountain Rescue Team to charge for non-emergency call-outs... 4
Doylem 3 years

The announcement was made in Ambleside, today, by Bob Fell, a grizzled mountaineer and team leader, who would give Chris Bonington a run for his money in a Chris Bonington look-alike competition....

ShrineSide Advertising Co reports massive profit plunge in celeb death downturn 1
ronseal 3 years

Shrine Side Advertising, the company that sells advertising space alongside high profile floral tributes, has issued a profit warning after a slowdown in celebrity deaths. Analysts have revised...

British pound to be privatised 1
Tom O'Hara 3 years

The Coalition government today moved up a gear in its efforts to kick start the UK economy, unveiling radical plans to privatise the national currency, the British pound. Chancellor George Osborne...

Paedophiles to be banned from buying gingerbread boy kits 0
simonjmr 3 years
Bears claim childhood obesity to blame for Goldilocks rampage 0
simonjmr 3 years

"How else can you explain the greed she displayed in eating the porridge? Added to the fact that s mere little girl was too heavy for a chair intended for a far heavier juvenile bear cub?" a...

Dr. Phil authors book, "My Love-Hate relationship with Apple" 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Police to be paid with second-hand iPods instead of money. 1
Tammy Flugh 3 years

More confiscations soon...

Blackberry launch low cost alternative the NickBerry. Because every loser wins. 0
martin2381 3 years
Authories call for calm over James Corden's 'pregnant fiancee' 6
Oxbridge 3 years

The government and police up and down the UK have appealed for the British people not to overreact to the growing awareness that Julia Carey, 31, has not only got engaged to the unfunny celebrity...

Criminal gangs agree to cuts in line with Police numbers 3
Gerontius 3 years

Violent criminals and organised gangs throughout England and Wales have agreed to scale back their criminal activities by around 20% for the year starting April 2013-2014, The criminal cutbacks were...

Bans on Pakistani crickers overturned “on technicality”... 1
Doylem 3 years

The International Cricket Council (ICC), the world governing body, has overturned the bans on three Pakistani cricketers, for illegal ‘spot-fixing activities. Chairman of the tribunal, Michael...

Weather update 2
riesler 3 years
Assange lawyer claims client will be forced to look at pictures of George W Bush 1
Ostsee 3 years
People who never use libraries protest over closures 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

Thousands of people who have never used a public library in their lives have suddenly decided to protest against their closure., Said one protester: 'Libraries are great! I came in here today and...

Tribute to former Thin Lizzy guitarist ... 1
riesler 3 years

no Moore soon...

True to his word, Fernando Torres doesn't celebrate scoring against Liverpool. 1
riesler 3 years

more karma soon...

“Platitudes on demand” from revamped NHS DIrect help-line... 2
Doylem 3 years

In the wake of the cuts, the NHS Direct help-line is being relaunched as an automated service, offering a range of reassuring platitudes about callers’ ailments. “It won’t get better if you...

ASBOs to be replaced with public naughty step 0
CAC 3 years

Home Secretary Theresa May will announce today that a new policy of confiscating iPods, mobile phones and other gadgets from anti-social young people will be supplemented by the last-resort deterrent...

Fat cats blamed for Sumo corruption in Japan 0
euanc 3 years
Government plan to get more police on the streets, by making them unemployed!!! 1
Ian Searle 3 years
Geordie sets new world record by eating 365 Marathons 4
Gerontius 3 years

You know the rest...

Man receives third degree from University of Wife 2
Psycadelic Squirrel 3 years

Hopefully no more soon...

Odds shortening on Premiership relegation being decided alphabetically 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years

West 'Am tipped to survive...