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Live action version of Godzilla now much closer, claim Japanese scientists 1
Iamthestig 3 years
Suspicions grow about the census question on happiness... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

as the only permitted answers are:, a) happy,, b) very happy,, c) happy with the first past the post election system,, d) very happy sacking overpaid public servants and, e) ludicrously happy...

Daily Mail 'still trying to find cancer, house price angle' on Japan earthquake 3
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

[i]Daily Mail[/i] reporters are working 'round the clock' to identify a link between the Japanese earthquake and either cancer, house prices or political correctness, the paper's editor has said....

Greengrocer arrested after drive-by fruiting. 1
mr blue 3 years
Wenger bids for two keepers; accidentally buys Lehman Brothers. 0
tl72uk 3 years
Police search for Ed Miliband continues - no reports of any sightings... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

for over three months now. No-one is helping police with their enquiries...

Excitable Osborne is counting down to the new Age of Austerity... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

because on April 1st we will finally leave behind the bloated, overblown and wasteful budgets of the last Government, and we can live on gruel and old newspaper casserole until we get the next...

Clegg to enter a coalition with the rest of his party 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Clegg's prayers answered by disasters in Libya and Japan... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

avoiding any embarrassing press coversge of the Lib Dem spring conference...

Kerry Katona misses out again at Crufts 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Hungry Imam modifies stance against ham 3
Genghis Cohen 3 years
Ronco releases Osama Bin Laden video compilation "Now That's What I Call Jihad" 1
ronseal 3 years
Next on Comedy Central, Charlie Sheen in Two and a Half Kilos. 0
tl72uk 3 years
Mr Sheen good at cleaning up dust from hard surfaces 2
simonjmr 3 years
Six Nations: Martin Johnson expects England improvement .... 4
DiY 3 years

four wins out of four games not good enough!...

Mens' Outfitter arrested in driveby suiting and booting. 0
tl72uk 3 years
'Moral victory' for losing British 4x100m relay team who ignored backhanders 0
pinxit 3 years
Police hunt man with volume control after drive-by muting 0
Iamthestig 3 years
Devil confirms Nick Clegg no longer has any rights over Lib Dem Soul. 1
Ian Searle 3 years

His spokesdemons Divad Noremac and Egroeg Enrobso claim they hold the contract written in the blood of Middle England...

CAMERON BACKS "BENNY HILL THEME" FOR ENGLAND'S 2012 ENTRANCE. 0
3 years
Police hunt man with chisel after drive-by fluting 4
bonjonelson 3 years
Management consultant divorces wife who made omelette without breaking eggs 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
80,000 die-hard fans due at Wembley for Manchester derby. Only 2 coaches needed 1
brownpaperreporter 3 years

And they are carrying the teams...

Police hunt south London gangsters after drive-by Tooting. 3
The Paper Ostrich 3 years
Briton killed in Japanese earthquake - death toll reaches 1 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

A Briton was killed in the recent Japanese earthquake, bringing the death toll in Japan to 1., There is a rumour that something might have happened to some other people there, but as they're all...

All future disasters to be graded by a BBC reporter fame index 1
greg various 3 years

Kate Adie saved for the Apocalypse...

Meltdown alert at Yorkie Bar factory. 0
DiY 3 years
Tesco to roll out “Lonely Meals” 7
beau-jolly 3 years

Following a successful trial of the “Curry Breakfast” variety in Cheshire, Supermarket giant Tesco announced today that it is rolling out its new range of “Lonely Meals” across all its stores...

Beliebers Repair Hole in Ozone Layer 2
LizzyG 3 years

Canadian scientists announced today that the massed fan base of pop-phenomenon Justin Bieber was having a reparative impact on the ozone layer. Studies have shown that where large groups of teenage...

Foreign Secretary William Hague wobbles in Japan earthquake UK help offer. 2
DiY 3 years