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Anarchist astrologer predicts a riot. 0
Ian Searle 03.01.13 1:21pm
Ian Searle
Cameron offers Argentina ownership of Scotland as compensation for Falklands 0
gregle 03.01.13 1:16pm
Ordeal has turned Davidson into a 'quivering bloke' says lawyer. 0
MADJEZ 03.01.13 1:14pm
Bob Dylan's sat nav finally tells him how many roads a man must walk down

Before you call him a man. (34 out of 3,485901 scanned)...

Ian Searle 03.01.13 1:13pm
Ian Searle
Davidson victims picked him out from conveyor belt of potential suspects

More soon Don't think the execution of this one's quite right yet though...

Qoxiivi 03.01.13 12:45pm
Retired gynaecologist still liked 'to keep his hand in' claim

no more soon...

custard cream 03.01.13 12:36pm
Deaf PC brings anxiety to animal world.

Ageing pensioner equine Mr Ed, and now retired bovine Ermintrude were arrested late last night by a partially deaf police officer who thought he had been informed by Police HQ to bring in any...

danster 03.01.13 11:33am
Olympic Vomiting Bug revealed

Scientists have reclassified thousands of cases of the winter vomiting bug after investigating the timings of various peaks in the recorded cases. They noticed that large spikes in the data...

Sheepback 03.01.13 10:50am
Jim Davidson demands 'Jim Davidson should be "strung up" -Kiddy fiddler'

there's no smoke without fire Nick Nick namby pamby liberals with their clever lawyers and long drawn out trials, hang 'em high, then send 'em back etc...

Jammydodgers 03.01.13 10:34am
Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue

A Darlaston woman has given birth and started to raise her first child while waiting in line at IKEA. After Helena Churchill and partner David Lomax loaded their shopping trolley with their bargain...

Dick Everyman 03.01.13 9:52am
"We're weeks away from arresting 80's alternate comics" Yewtree detective claims 0
simonjmr 03.01.13 9:25am
Could 2013 be the Year of Coming After 2012 says desperate pundit 0
ronseal 03.01.13 9:03am
40 year old man celebrates purchasing first pair of pants that fit 0
Dumbnews 03.01.13 4:22am
'Just Google it', says Citizens Advice Bureau.

Madge Whiting is proud of her new "Just Google it!" t-shirt in the familiar blue and yellow of the Citizens Advice Bureau. She's one of 21,000 volunteers who give up their free time to offer...

Boutros 03.01.13 1:57am
Apple products make clean sweep of 2012 Toy of the Year Awards 0
Dumbnews 03.01.13 1:06am
Jim Davidson demands 'Jim Davidson should be "strung up" -Kiddy fiddler'

there's no smoke without fire Nick Nick namby pamby liberals with their clever lawyers etc...

Jammydodgers 03.01.13 12:14am
Congo rebels overthrown by newer rebels 0
Dumbnews 03.01.13 12:08am
Nick Nick nicked 1
Squudge 02.01.13 11:12pm
Police Federation creative writing awards look forward to “Best Year Ever”

Ever since Sergeant Mark Smyth of Brixton Police Station won gold for his brilliant short story “Who I did on my holidays”, back in 1962, the Police Federation Creative Writing Awards have been...

nickb 02.01.13 10:43pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Police vow “not to rest until all the ‘old school’ comics are off the streets”..

With Freddie Starr and Jim Davidson being questioned by the police, a search of the nation’s golf courses is turning up a number of other suspects in the Savile affair. Arthur ‘Toxic’ Malone,...

Tripod 02.01.13 10:30pm
Dry January celebrates first day success as drinkers remain comatose

Norman Smith from Derby is delighted with a ‘magnificent start’ to his Dry January campaign. ‘It’s 2 January and I’ve not had an alcoholic drink since New Year's Eve,’ he said , toasting...

medici2471 02.01.13 9:28pm
Church reverts to wearing black as gay Mass banned 0
custard cream 02.01.13 9:26pm
custard cream
Jim Davidson nick-nicked..

Chalky turns supergrass. More soon...

MADJEZ 02.01.13 8:56pm
Web-footed creature swimming in Norfolk river ‘not necessarily local’ say RSPCA

A sea-lion spotted swimming up river in Norfolk was probably looking for a life-partner to mate with but could have been put off by local in-breeding explained Wilf Bannen from the RSPCA, The seal...

Gerontius 02.01.13 7:53pm
Britain apologises for trying to get into the wrong house after New Year bender

Britain has been forced to issue an apology today for drunkenly trying to get into France by mistake after a heavy night out celebrating on New Year’s Eve. The country had been out since early...

Vertically Challenged Giant 02.01.13 7:09pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Paparazzinator gets thumbs up from Bieber

Teen pop sensation Justin Bieber is reportedly delighted with his new paparazzinator. The gift was given to him by his family for Christmas but he has only just had chance to use it. Speaking of his...

Sheepback 02.01.13 6:31pm
Hate this

"Slow down, you move too fast". I do not want lifestyle advice from this website, thank you...

bonjonelson 02.01.13 6:15pm
County’s park and ride scheme a hit with doggers 0
Dick Everyman 02.01.13 5:44pm
Dick Everyman
wrong forum 0
Squudge 02.01.13 5:31pm
BBC ceases production of new TV programmes

The BBC has confirmed that original TV output ‘is no longer a priority’ and will cease producing new programmes by the middle of 2013. Following a successful two-week trial of buying loads of...

02.01.13 5:14pm