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...nothing to see .. Move on.

Shouldnt sub after only a few ours sleep over the past few daysNo more soon...

Not Amused 11.12.13 2:08pm
Not Amused
Cameron to use 'fake' sign language interpreter to announce policies for deaf

After it emerged the sign language interpreter used for Nelson Mandela's memorial was a fake, David Cameron is said to be considering employing him for the next election. It is thought he will use...

James Pluside 11.12.13 1:56pm
Alzheimer research will not include memories of the Coalition years

By 2025 the UK will double its annual funding for dementia studies but only on the understanding that no attempt will be made to remind voters of the last three years of government. David Cameron has...

Wrenfoe 11.12.13 1:48pm
Church Of Atheism Deemed to Be A Genuine Religion

Manchester United Football Club now to seek similar status...

Titus 11.12.13 1:47pm
Finding sex burns far more calories than having sex, says scientist 4
Dumbnews 11.12.13 1:12pm
Midfield Diamond
Man Wins £10k Betting on Arrest of DJ Campbell

A Nottingham man is enjoying a £10,000 win after successfully predicting the six people arrested on suspicion of football match fixing., Malcolm Burnett put the £50 bet on at a Ladbrokes in the...

james_doc 11.12.13 12:54pm
Comics invested money with HMRC claims Jimmy Carr.

A TV investigation by the funny man reveals that some of his fellow comedians handed over money to the shady financial organisation also known as Her Majesty’s Revenue and Customs. It is believed...

MADJEZ 11.12.13 11:23am
Hirst heist nominated for Turner Prize

The purloining of two Damien Hirst works of art has been roundly applauded by art critics the world over, prompting multiple nominations for the 2014 Turner Prize. The two pieces are believed to have...

spoole2112 11.12.13 11:13am
Denmark gets cold shoulder after cosying up to USA

Scandinavian partners have been throwing frosty looks in Denmark's direction lately, after she was caught flirting with America at a recent international function in South Africa., Photographers...

NewBiscuit 11.12.13 9:55am
Blogger turns dreary myopic rant upbeat with the words: here endeth the lecture

Blogger Dave Stenson was cock-a-hoop last night after ending his latest long earnest rant on an upbeat note that will leave readers desperate for more...

ronseal 11.12.13 9:12am
Newton to sue Alfonso Cuarón for theft of intellectual property over Gravity. 0
Ian Searle 11.12.13 8:23am
Ian Searle
Scan to detect potential signs of Jeremy Hunt in news stories available on NHS

This could massively reduce suffering...

Ian Searle 11.12.13 8:22am
Ian Searle
Nectar win F1 contract to supply double points for last race. 0
weematt 11.12.13 8:12am
"New statue for top of Nelson's column would be a monumental error" says Mayor 0
weematt 11.12.13 7:40am
Mayor of Toronto disappointed at being overlooked for Mandela's memorial 0
custard cream 10.12.13 10:54pm
custard cream
Sergeant Major dismissed as 'attention seeker' 0
nickb 10.12.13 10:42pm
Scottish border stolen

The future of the campaign for Scottish independence has been thrown into doubt following reports that the border between Scotland and England has been stolen. The theft, which has left locals,...

jamsieoconnor 10.12.13 9:27pm
The All New Jeni B
Russia endorses Sauron

The UK Foreign Office has advised all members of the Fellowship of the Ring to avoid visiting the land of Rudolf Nureyev. There are fears that the country's toughening laws on homosexuality will...

Wrenfoe 10.12.13 9:20pm
Obama dissuaded from Whitney Houston medley at last minute by Archbishop Tutu

Greatest news of all at 1...

blokefromstoke 10.12.13 9:07pm
Football player admits trying to influence matches by scoring goals 2
jp1885 10.12.13 8:39pm
Colleagues started to worry about liver surgeon when he brought onions to work. 0
dominic_mcg 10.12.13 8:09pm
Newsbiscuit Team Effort: The New Nigella Cookbook

There are lots of ideas, but I think we can synthesize the [s]least worst[/s] best Nigella gags into a handy volume: Amidst claims made in the High Court and the sudden collapse of her marriage,...

AReader 10.12.13 8:07pm
Universe Begins To Implode Recursively As 3D Printer Makes a 3D Printer 0
Titus 10.12.13 8:06pm
Vesta repairman admits to match fixing

More to follow...

apepper 10.12.13 8:05pm
David Moyes denies match fixing allegations

no more please...

Scronnyglonkle 10.12.13 6:46pm
French PIP breast implant business goes tits up...ooh la la 0
irreverendJ 10.12.13 6:16pm
Obesity 'crisis' in British schools saves millions

An independent report has found that almost all of British teens are obese. The report was conducted by 6 stone Amanda Taylor, a recovering bulimia sufferer and now Chairman of the 'Sexy Sexy Shhh...

Mr Orca 10.12.13 3:24pm
Mr Orca
Cancer Still Fatal ‘Despite Leaflets and Special Facebook Page’

The NHS has warned that diseases such as cancer are still frequently proving fatal, despite improvements in leaflet distribution and even the promotion of a new NHS Anti-Cancer Facebook page. Health...

deceangli 10.12.13 3:04pm
Gang of four Orcs and one Troll being moved to Guantanamo. More soon.

Gang of four Orcs and one Troll being moved to Guantanamo. More soon...

Ching 10.12.13 2:48pm
Comedy weapons put the fun back into warfare

Funded by the general public, Lenny Henry today delivered the final consigment of arms to the Republic of Bongo. Developed in Comic Relief's secret laboratory, the armaments include boxing-glove...

errm 10.12.13 2:25pm