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Microsoft to bring back the paperclip 0
theumpire 3 years
Police urge women suspecting intruder in house to run a bath and lie in it 0
Nick McCarr 3 years
Racism and cheating explained to Dalglish after continued defence of Suarez 2
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Liverpool manager Kenny Dalglish has been having private tuition this week, in an attempt to get him to understand that racist comments and persistent cheating from one of his players are bad things....

Croatia orders Farepak Christmas hamper 0
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
'London taxi drivers have brains' shock claim by scientists 0
Griffin 3 years

Ask Leo and Lucy: what’s the carbon footprint of a hand job? 2
Runestone Cowboy 3 years

[i]The dilemma:[/i] I love the planet, and want to save it for future generations. However, I also enjoy hand jobs from anonymous escorts. Are hand jobs ‘green’, or should I feel guilty about...

'World is flat' declare X-Factor judges 2
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Scottish utilities 'freak winter weather' shock: Driving wind and lashing rain 0
dvo4fun 3 years

More soon (no doubt)...

Scottish wind turbine program derailed by ‘wrong sort of wind’. 6
malgor 3 years
Coalition will prioritise the non-taxpayer 1
Zadok the second 3 years

The government has announced a policy shift away from meeting the needs of ‘the taxpayer’, a spokesperson announced yesterday. “ "Taxpayer" is a very nebulous concept”, she continued....

Battle to re-connect 20m UK homes to Europe after storm batters Brussels 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Desperate scientist resorts to hundreds of ‘missing particle’ posters 5
Runestone Cowboy 3 years

A scientist desperate to be united with a missing particle has resorted to leaving posters on every lamp-post in his local area. The particle, thought to answer to the name Higgs Boson, has been...

Blow for Edinburgh Zoo after both pandas diagnosed with pancreatic cancer 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Cameron out of Europe but still very confident of success in Europa Cup 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
...Iran TV goes on and on and on about drones. 0
nickb 3 years
Tiny pilot held, claims Tehran.... 0
nickb 3 years
CIA denies captured drone was from Maplins 0
nickb 3 years
US shelves development of pleasure weapon – early trials “too successful” 0
bumtrinket 3 years

Needs development - Possible content:, Patented tuned radio frequency orgasmulation technology, US DOD cited concerns that US military would be overstretched with any old Country claiming secret...

Music Industry admits, 'we've run out of songs' 8
Perks 3 years

The music industry has today announced that the reason all modern songs sound the same is because essentially, they are. The news comes just days before the X-Factor final, and weeks before the...

Prancer the brown-nosed reindeer is second in line and doesn't stop so fast 0
Smart Alex 3 years
Pendle Hill update : cottage residents grasp of cat-husbandry "appalling" 0
FlashArry 3 years
Merkel asks Edexcel for answer to Eurozone crisis... 0
deskpilot3 3 years
Rotherham man says Cameron gone abroad for summit... 0
Laughingstock 3 years

but doesn't know how long for...

Pandas 'a bit dicky' after first taste of deep-fried bamboo.... 0
deskpilot3 3 years
The Worlds first Clinic for Stalkers opens in London - other cities to follow... 0
Laughingstock 3 years

in time for the panto season: He's behind you...

Scottish pandas demand repatriation. Or kites 0
FlashArry 3 years

"difficult to make out the logograms they've drawn due to the driving rain"...

Channel 5 viewers expected to double as Man Utd "qualify" for Europa League 1
ItsReevesy 3 years
Marwell macaque hackers attack knackers Whipsnade website 0
FlashArry 3 years

[url=]Straight out of waylands zoo FP ?[/url] More soon...

US drone captured by Iran "was actually Rick Perry" 0
FlashArry 3 years
Mock examiners may have to deputise after Welsh sackings 0
nickb 3 years