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Saatchi & Saatchi launches new poster campaign: ‘Nigella Isn’t Working’

Queue of drug dealers outside front door. Nigella retaliates by publishing new seasonal kid’s recipe – how to prepare the perfect Christmas joint in 2 minutes flat...

0
Damien_H 23.12.13 8:44am
Damien_H
Pope forgot it was Christmas admits Vatican

A Vatican official has apologised to large crowds gathered in St.Peter’s Square saying the Pope had forgotten it was Christmas and had gone off hill walking in Umbria, The Pope had muttered...

0
Gerontius 23.12.13 8:36am
Gerontius
Father Christmas To Be Replaced By EuroSanta

Under a forthcoming EU directive, exisitng different individual national Father Christmases are to be swept aside to make way for a standard, pan-European version, yet to be given a...

0
Titus 23.12.13 8:25am
Titus
Graeme Swann announcement "just the tip of the Titanic" says Boycott

Reacting to the unforseen resignation from all forms of cricket by spin bowler Graeme Swann, Geoff Boycott believes there is more to come. "Swanny resigning, not surprised. I think it is just the tip...

1
weematt 22.12.13 11:37pm
AReader
Graeme Swann wins award for "Most Epic Flounce in Ashes History"

Darren Lehmann leads tributes...

0
AReader 22.12.13 11:33pm
AReader
Vincent Tan quits after it was revealed he was born in the year of the twat 0
godly1966 22.12.13 9:36pm
godly1966
Joseph Unhappy About Pregnancy But Says 'At least We're In A Stable Relationship 1
Titus 22.12.13 9:35pm
Squudge
Only 26 sleeps till Christmas says cat lover 0
Sfox 22.12.13 9:35pm
Sfox
Migrant cap will be available in all sizes, says Cameron. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 22.12.13 7:53pm
dominic_mcg
Santa Claus "must be seeking work for 3 months" before he can claim benefits. 0
Al OPecia 22.12.13 6:52pm
Al OPecia
Omo shortage looms as shepherds indulge in orgy of sock washing. 0
Maverick 22.12.13 6:02pm
Maverick
Guardian decides not to publish everyone's Incognito browsing history after all

The world let out an enormous sigh of relief today as Guardian editor Alan Rusbridger announced publicly that the paper has decided against publishing everyone's browsing history on Google Chrome's...

0
D 22.12.13 5:40pm
D
Joseph & Mary Post Poor Feedback For Bethlehem Inn On TripAdvisor

"Squalid accommodation, and we were continually disturbed by intrusions from members of the public...

5
Titus 22.12.13 5:29pm
Titus
Shoppers asked to remove shoes before entering M & S

novelty "pigs in prayer mats" idea put on hold...

0
A.A.Arkwright 22.12.13 3:10pm
A.A.Arkwright
Nigella becomes the New Face of Cocaine as Columbian cartel drops Abbey Clancy. 0
MADJEZ 22.12.13 2:07pm
MADJEZ
Old fart posts duplicate post. Gets away with it. 0
MADJEZ 22.12.13 2:06pm
MADJEZ
Rivers of Blood fear as immigration restriction is lifted for Romanian Vampires

Daily Mail predicts cuttle fish shortages when unprecedented numbers of Budgerigar‎s are allowed into the country as New Year rings in in little cages across Eastern Europe...

0
Ian Searle 22.12.13 12:51pm
Ian Searle
Shepherds Prosecuted For Abandonong Flocks

"Apparently they had all strolled down to a pub in Bethlehem" said an RSPCA spokesman "with some tale of seeing angels or moving stars. Not really the season for magic mushrooms though, so we're not...

0
Titus 22.12.13 12:02pm
Titus
Drug mules infiltrate nativity plays.

The scene in the junior boys toilets at Chesham Primary was shocking. ‘It was drug paraphernalia all right,’ said teacher Patricia Smythe. ‘But on a bizarrely large scale. Huge rolled up...

1
nickb 22.12.13 11:45am
godly1966
England Cricket Selectors Beg Santa For Some Batsmen, Bowlers & Fielders 0
Titus 22.12.13 11:29am
Titus
Christmas 'Peaked Too Early' This Year Report

Marketing consultants [i]Trend Surveys[/i] say in a report released today that Christmas 2013 has clearly peaked too early, with consumers already having moved on from the yuletide festival and begun...

0
Titus 22.12.13 11:22am
Titus
Neanderthal conversations were 'mostly about immigration' says anthropologist 11
cinquecento 22.12.13 10:59am
Titus
As all premiership managers sacked, army called in to take charge. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 21.12.13 6:30pm
dominic_mcg
Sprout-eating record disallowed for being ‘wind-assisted’... 3
Tripod 21.12.13 6:07pm
godly1966
As Jack Whitehall drones on and on, bored theatre critics live in hope…

(See picture here. 'Live At The Apollo' scheduled for tonight @ 9:30pm BBC. Maybe.)...

1
pinxit 21.12.13 5:59pm
Sinnick
Bit of Bully Beaten

There was mild shock and uproar in the world of darts today as a bit of bully was beaten, contrary to common knowledge, Newton's forth law of motion, and contravening the Geneva Convention., It was...

1
thisisall1word 21.12.13 5:32pm
ゴルゴ13
Worrying report shows most twentysomethings 'still not feeling Christmassy'

A report undertaken by the Department of Health has shown that the majority of people in their mid-twenties are still not feeling the magic of the festive season despite the worrying proximity to...

5
D 21.12.13 3:47pm
Lindy Moone
No-one apart from 'H from Steps' has Googled 'H from Steps' court reveals. 2
MADJEZ 21.12.13 2:28pm
Squudge
wongwoom 0
Squudge 21.12.13 1:51pm
Squudge
Tony Blair selfie portrait unveiled at National Portrait Gallery

The acrylic on canvas painting of the former PM shows him in dramatic pose, taking a 'selfie' photo as he reflects on his career. "He suggested the selfie concept," said artist Eric Tring RA. "With...

0
pinxit 21.12.13 12:47pm
pinxit