The NewsBiscuit Writers' Room
Everything on these pages has been submitted by readers of the site and appears here unedited. Potential front page stories as well as one-liners for the ticker bar are welcome, so if you would like to write for NewsBiscuit please post your article on this submission board and then attempt to give yourself maximum votes over and over again. The most prolific and successful contributors will be considered for the coveted title of 'Writer of the Month'.
|Topic — Add New »||Comments||Votes||Author||Freshness|
|Norwich claim shortest yellow lines narrowly beating Nick Cleggs spine.||0||
|Ed Miliband ‘not even taken seriously at home’||10||
||Vertically Challenged Giant||3 years|
In a candid interview Ed Miliband’s wife, Justine Thornton, has admitted that the Labour leader isn’t even taken seriously by his own family, and is held in contempt by his two young sons,...
|Nick Clegg confirmed as World's smallest man by Guinness Book of Records||1||
|Edinburgh Pandas to be Stuffed and Mounted||0||
|Canadian Government votes for Warmer Winters||0||
After a heated debate about the Kyoto Protocol and Canada’s failure to adhere to the treaty, the government finally put the issue of global warming to an internal vote with the result that...
|Hitchens beats CERN to discovery of God particle.||2||
|Kenny Dalglish presents first BBC Celeb Weathercast : "Mebbe snaw, mebbe naw"||3||
|Santa growing old but at least he still has his elf||1||
||Smart Alex||3 years|
|Clegg tells cheese eating surrender monkeys to calm the rhetoric||0||
|George Bush declines lead role in new "Mission-Impossible"||0||
|Clegg urges French to see sense, then realises who he's talking to||3||
Nick Clegg has withdrawn to rethink his Euro policy after realising he was trying to make the French see sense...
|French midget steals show in EU panto 'Jacques and the Banktalks'||3||
Theatre critics have slammed the performance of the lead midget in this season's EU pantomime, 'Jacques and the Banktalks'. Understudy Nicolas Sarkozy took over the role some years ago from a young...
|Outbreak of male snow writing leads to Met Office amber snow warning||0||
|F1 boss decreases popularity to new low with LibDem themed orgy.||0||
|M&S Adverts To Be Banned.||0||
MARKS and Spencers have had their seasonal television advertisements banned after complaints were received by OFCOM. It was ruled today that the adverts place unessential pressure on low-income...
|Northern commuters braced for blizzard of reports about snow in London||17||
||Runestone Cowboy||3 years|
Commuters north of Watford are bracing themselves for trying conditions on the roads this week, as they battle to find a radio station that doesn’t bang on and on about a bit of snow in London....
|Light relief from BBC News today "Staines to be removed from signs"...||1||
|Jackson estate and Vatican race to deny Nether Land abuse claims||0||
|London Zoo in feverish preparations as Guardian reports snow lizards in Wales||0||
|Advertising Standards Agency bans pork pie commercial||1||
|Japan declares Fukushima stable. Birth of 2 headed Jesus expected any day.||4||
|"EU! Out there in the cold, getting lonely, getting old, can you feel me?"||7||
|Kent Police Crush Local Pesto Ring||14||
Kent Police were this afternoon formally congratulated on the outstanding success of Operation Ploughmans. Speaking from outside Downing St, Prime Minister David Cameron praised the two month...
|Celebrity loses weight using only personal trainer, hired chef and dietician.||0||
|Genetically-modified turkey available soon||1||
||Major Clanger||3 years|
“Market research told us that many people find turkey a very dry meat,” said a spokesman for Bernard Matthews, the biggest turkey farmer in the UK. “Our scientists set about developing a new...
|Nut roast rescued from mental hospital fire||0||
|‘It’s not Christmas yet’ storms rage across Britain||3||
||Midfield Diamond||3 years|
Family life is in turmoil in countless homes across the country as disputes erupt over when to make a start on the bounteous snacks stockpiled for Christmas, according to the Citizens Advice Bureau...
|Catholic priests accused of child abuse in the Nether regions||1||
|"Text 2 Report Auto Accidents" Program Launch Delayed||4||
Officials have postponed the launch of a service which allows drivers to notify highway patrol of hazardous road conditions via text message. An advertising campaign to raise awareness of the...
|Brisk sales of 2013 diaries reported||4||
Brisk sales of 2013 calendars reported as people seek to put gloomy 2012 behind them Despite the economic climate or perhaps because of it, retailers are reporting healthy sales of 2013 calendars a...
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