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Birds Eye Crispy Chicken found to contain bird's eye

I know, but someone had to say it...

Sinnick 22.02.13 1:55pm
ITV to launch new reality show: Diving on Ice 0
waggers 22.02.13 12:49pm
I'm not being hidden, say Maria Hutchings from behind a comedically large vase 0
johnnydobbo 22.02.13 12:49pm
Police kept body parts. "I can't believe they had the guts", says victim 0
topfotogmw 22.02.13 12:15pm
Penis size in the animal kingdom ‘does matter’ say scientists

Scientists have discovered that certain female proles from the south-east of England use the size of a male prole’s penis to decide whether it is worth going out on a date with him., Research...

Gerontius 22.02.13 11:32am
Pistorius: "What an amateur", sniffs investigating officer 0
sydalg 22.02.13 10:53am
EASTLEIGH EXORCISM: Cameron ensures wayward candidate toes party line

"The Power of Dave compels you" Anyone else picked up on Dave's paranoia when it was suggested that Ms Hutchings'...

pinxit 22.02.13 10:49am
Gay man offended by public indifference to his coming out 1
Dumbnews 22.02.13 10:47am
‘Suicide videos did not show Sparkhill at its best’ insist locals

Residents from a housing estate in Birmingham are said to be furious after a plan to blow up parts of the City centre were thwarted by counter-terrorist squads., People from the Sparkhill area are...

Uncle Bertie 22.02.13 10:30am
Dick Everyman
TV's Economics Miracle Hour bankrupting the rich and stupid

An investigation by the BBC has discovered that satellite TV channel EconUK has given dangerous advice to callers of the show who claim to be in economic turmoil, potentially putting them at risk of...

kga6 22.02.13 8:51am
Dangerous levels of dust found in North London stadium trophy room 4
topfotogmw 22.02.13 6:33am
Unfunny loudmouth on standby as BRITs host James Corden suffers tonsilitus 1
ginty 22.02.13 12:59am
Answerphone speaker broken on referees' whistle-blowers helpline 0
Perks 22.02.13 12:47am
Triple-Dip Recession Likely as Chancellor puts UK on Magic Beans Standard

Confidence in the UK economy hit an all-time low when it was revealed that the Chancellor, George Osborne, has placed the country on the magic beans standard saying: “It's true that I attended a...

Carter 21.02.13 11:48pm
'A jury of her peers' ends in a dozen fruitbats with bad judgement 6
Squudge 21.02.13 11:45pm
sponge finger
Prince Philip showing 'worrying signs of being back in good health'

Fears that the Duke of Edinburgh may have returned to rude health were strengthened yesterday when he told a nurse from the Philippines that her country must be 'half empty' because so many of her...

roybland 21.02.13 11:36pm
Satire site relaunches as Newlabour'sbiscuit

Fucking brilliant work Truebiscuit, another belter...

Truebiscuit 21.02.13 11:34pm
One Direction Comic Relief single voted stalkers' favourite

Think it goes something like, 'I'm gonna get you one way or another.'...

custard cream 21.02.13 6:14pm
Rootin Tootin
Briers was rhubarb claims pink cat

well I have been missing for some time!...

spoole2112 21.02.13 5:25pm
Shed for the yard turned into a Shard, complains despairing online shopper.

An unfortunate online shopping error has resulted in a Surrey man being delivered a 300-metre skyscraper instead of the garden shed he thought he had bought. "Instead of an 8ft by 12ft shed with a...

Boutros 21.02.13 5:10pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Man loses everything to not sound like an online loser

A man from Basingstoke has admitted spending hundreds of thousands of pounds on a team of writers to help him fill out the 'about you' sections across his social media profiles. John Dawkins decided...

Perks 21.02.13 5:04pm
Countryfile a den of shameful drug addicts

The glazed expression, irritable disposition and distant far-away look more commonly associated with Countryfile viewers is actually symptomatic of its reporter’s! The lid has been lifted a little...

theinvisiblecitychannels 21.02.13 4:44pm
Pistorius could easily jump bail, claim prosecutors

Sports fans say he will bounce back...

MikeF 21.02.13 4:25pm
GPS malfunction to blame for Giro d'Italia starting in Belfast 0
custard cream 21.02.13 3:42pm
custard cream
Cameron embarks on star studded apologies tour

David Cameron has embarked on a major apologies tour of former Commonwealth and British colonies whilst sealing new deals in the UK’s booming entertainment industry. Dubbed the Ain’t...

Dick Everyman 21.02.13 3:32pm
custard cream
Jedward forbid Ed Miliband from liking their music

First rate stuff Truebiscuit. Fuck me, that's a good one...

Truebiscuit 21.02.13 3:29pm
custard cream
Radiant Kate unfazed by odd creature

The Palace is delighted to report that the Duchess of Cambridge is completely untroubled by recent unflattering statements. "Consider the source" Kate is reported to have murmured "it is a bit like...

Squudge 21.02.13 2:54pm
custard cream
Hampshire woman survives nocturnal micturition incident again. Police baffled. 5
FlashArry 21.02.13 2:41pm
The All New Jeni B
Archaeologists discover historical incident not yet apologised for 0
sydalg 21.02.13 2:36pm
Woman who injected duck DNA into her breasts has a 'Quacking pair of tits' 4
antharrison 21.02.13 2:34pm