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Wizzard apologises for his part in making it Christmas every day

'I do feel guilty sometimes, especially when I see all the mountains of tat infesting every shop and all the tacky TV ads for Chinese made-tat before the cricket season is even over,' says Roy Wood,...

Oxbridge 12.12.12 2:47pm
I wish it wasn’t Christmas every day, admits Wizzard

Roy Wood, former lead singer of the glam rock band Wizzard, has apologised for the role he played in ensuring that it is now Christmas every day of the year. ‘Yeah, I’m really pissed off, but how...

Oxbridge 12.12.12 2:46pm
New Communications Data Bill requires all conversations to be remembered

A redrafting of the Communications Data Bill will require everyone in the UK to make a verbatim record of every conversation they have, noting the place and time and cross referencing it to the...

beau-jolly 12.12.12 2:42pm
World to be saved if God & Satan can find venue for wedding.

After years of what they have called "living in denial" God and Satan have finally buried the hatchet and declared their undying love for each other. During a trip to the Thor’s Helmet Nebula,...

Gaz 12.12.12 2:21pm
Church announces new ‘wed and burn’ approach to gay marriage

The Church of England last night denied government claims that it was opposed to gay marriage ceremonies, saying that it was more than happy to welcome homosexuals into the house of God, on the...

thumper 12.12.12 1:52pm
The Church in shock defeat to A(fc)Theism

There were boos from the terraces and disapproving looks from the pews following news of Premiership side The Church's shock defeat to a rejuvenated A(fc)Theism side. Despite being in charge for...

beagle 12.12.12 11:31am
Antarctic scientists find life in subterranean lake

It's here somewhere, hang on while I find a candle...

Dick Everyman 12.12.12 10:55am
Dick Everyman
As Coleen leaves IKEA store she has nagging feeling she's forgotten something...

pinxit 12.12.12 10:30am
School teachers work of poor treatment of ID 6 into vacation work in other citie

Class of November 16th, Gold River school the fourth grade 1 class of Fan Yanbin teacher is to give students a language lesson .The Beijing News reporter Yin Yafei photography class ...

12.12.12 10:12am
Cast of The Little Mermaid reunited in Goan Curry 2
gaijintendo 12.12.12 9:59am
Dick Everyman
First Gay Marriage for ‘Nick and Dave’ from Westminster

Nick Clegg and David Cameron made a public demonstration of their commitment to gay marriage yesterday by formally tying the knot at Westminster Abbey. The happy couple make their vows before...

Burlington Danes 12.12.12 9:18am
Church bracing itself for massive turnout

The Church of England is said to be bracing itself for a massive turnout this Sunday morning after the government announced the ban on same sex marriage in church., But research carried out amongst...

Gerontius 12.12.12 8:36am
OAPs threaten to bare all in Old Girls Calendar fundraiser

An enterprising group of elderly ladies from Buxton believe they have hit upon a unique fund raising scheme by promising not to issue a nude calendar provided the public pledge sufficient funds for a...

Stan 12.12.12 7:22am
Dickens or Shakespeare
Multinationals refuse to answer calls from UK in case it's the taxman. 0
Gaz 12.12.12 1:02am
US fines HSBC $1.9bn plus $50 for the letter telling them 2
Duncan Biscuit 12.12.12 12:26am
Clegg's visits to behind his opposition to web monitoring 2
Gaz 12.12.12 12:23am
Mandela health concerns deepen as Keith Vaz on Heathrow standby 4
dvo4fun 11.12.12 11:15pm
, 0
Golgo13 11.12.12 10:45pm
BNP blame more non-British residents on 'bloody foreigners' 0
Perks 11.12.12 10:10pm
Scotland to allow the Gay Gordons at weddings. 0
bonjonelson 11.12.12 9:14pm
John Terry approves of FA plan to give cultural lessons to foreign players 0
Ian 11.12.12 8:27pm
Web monitoring: 'With great power comes great responsibility', says Clegg 1
custard cream 11.12.12 7:53pm
Dick Everyman
Belfast management consultant says fly Union flag to see if anyone salutes it 1
Duncan Biscuit 11.12.12 7:40pm
custard cream
Civil liberty group launches 'mind your own f*****g business' app 1
Dick Everyman 11.12.12 7:39pm
custard cream
Jaguar Land Rover mulls factory in Saudi Arabia to build hands-free car 1
Duncan Biscuit 11.12.12 7:37pm
custard cream
Fiery Hoop Systems launches more stupid IT things you might have to keep up with

Stuff you have to learn to remain employable just got even more bloody frustrating, with the launch of Wazza Point, the new social media in the cloud as a service platform, that promises to...

ronseal 11.12.12 7:35pm
custard cream
"Tax avoidance schemes" most searched term on Google. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 11.12.12 7:20pm
Al OPecia
Lurpak on offer in Asda, says your wife's mother at 6 in the frigging morning

According to a source close to your wife, who has just been positively identified with her mother, Lurpak is 40% off in Asda this week. The news emerged in a phone call that woke you from a dream...

Oxbridge 11.12.12 6:41pm
Belfast greengrocer told to remove onion flag. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 11.12.12 6:31pm
Operation Yewtree to investigate Ventriloquist

Operation Yewtree has been widened to investigate abuse claims brought against Keith Harris, one of the UKs best known Ventriloquists. We cannot tell you the identity of his alleged victim but can...

beagle 11.12.12 6:31pm
Otto Jespersen