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Lansley "Given a cup of sweet tea and a bit of a lie down". More soon. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 3 years
Government announces unemployment fell since this mornings announcement 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years

Ministers were pleased to announce that the number of people out of work fell by one after the figures released at 9am Apparently Mr Eric Trimble collapsed and died at Worksop DSS while waiting to...

Cracks begin to show as bottom falls out of underpant market 2
Pinhead 3 years

and Calvin Klein hits skid row...

Independent: Kate Middleton gets Diana's ring resized... 5
be reasonable 3 years

how do you follow that?...

Price fixing by soap making firms - the bubble bursts 2
brownpaperreporter 3 years
Philosophical pig admits "I'm pink, therefore I'm spam"... 0
be reasonable 3 years

more soon., Or, "I'm pink, therefore I ham"...

Descartes' verdict on Rooney: He doesn't think, therefore he isn't. 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Nation prepares for day of street parties to celebrate AV referendum 10
Ludicity 3 years

The British people are preparing to bring out the bunting for a day of street parties, fetes and carnivals to celebrate the chance to express their views on electoral reform. ‘May the 5th will be...

Charlie from Casualty to replace Andrew Lansley as new Health Secretary 0
Basil_B 3 years

In response to the 98% no confidence vote by nurses working for the NHS on current Health Secretary Andrew Lansley the coalition government have decided to replace him with Charlie Fairhead the main...

NewsBiscuit writer makes over obvious contribution 0
glass90 3 years

A NewsBiscuit writer today was accused of making a "really rubbish obvious contribution". The alleged obviousness concerns a submission about Wayne Rooney’s swearing incident. There are also...

Tories and Liberals unmasked in sham marriage clampdown 5
simonjmr 3 years

A senior Lib Dem councillor has warned that the sham marriage of the Liberal Party to the Conservatives could result in many Lib Dem councillors losing their seats on 5 May due to coalition policies ...

All-gay jury 'still out' 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Yemen passes law banning the wearing of berets and strings of onions 1
Pinhead 3 years

Well everyone else is bloody doing it No more soon...

Struggling zip manufacturer managing to "keep things together", says spokesman. 1
MC One R 3 years
There's a Moussa loose aboot ma hoose 0
Pinhead 3 years

Exclaims Russ Abbot. From his holiday time-share. In Tripoli. Plausibly...

The Koran available online for you to download and burn your own copy 11
simonjmr 3 years
RAC cancels all leave in West Midlands as first MG for 16 years is produced 6
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Mubarak and sons request their detention to be in bungalows 0
simonjmr 3 years

That way they avoid nasty falls down stairs in the next 15 days More soon...

Horse whisperer just a "nay sayer" claims vet 2
simonjmr 3 years
Final blow for Mubarak as Grecian 2000 withdraw from sponsorship deal 0
SteveCut 3 years
Iran passes law banning the wearing of berets and strings of onions 6
rickwestwell 3 years
Bush begins war on terriers 8
Batmankoff 3 years

In retirement former president has began his war on terriers, sources close to George W. Bush have indicated today. "They are a threat to our very way of life, you're either with us or you're with...

Stageshow of Mr Men character Mr Tickle flops as no one laughs 0
Basil_B 3 years
Karzai warns Ed Miliband of ‘forgotten war’ between Blairites & Brownites 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Nurses pan Andrew Lansley’s NHS plans 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Defeat leaves Chelsea free to concentrate on coming 3rd in the Premiership 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Gagarin: "Never nervous. Been driving Ladas all my life. Technology was proven." 1
SteveCut 3 years

50 years too late for this one?...

This post intentionally left ambiguous 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Much hyped Microsoft Crash Solution turns out to be "Turn it off and on again". 3
BillyBitzer 3 years
France veil arrest woman unmasked as Noel Edmonds in Gotcha return 0
Midnight Dreary 3 years