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‘There but for the grace of God’ writes unicorn, in review of Noah film... 1
Tripod 12.03.14 7:43pm
Overcrowding on London Midland train creates "Anti-matter" from passengers - 2

Overcrowding on a London Midland service to Crewe from Euston earlier today reached a critical point when the densely-packed passengers fused together to create anti-matter and the beginnings of a...

blokefromstoke 12.03.14 7:42pm
Climate change refugees from Somerset arrive in Southern Spain

[this space intentionally blank for rest of story]...

AReader 12.03.14 6:48pm
Poland set to replace Scotland in UK in event of Yes vote

The British Government has revealed that preliminary talks have taken place with their Polish counterparts this week which could pave the way for Poland to replace Scotland as part of the UK should...

bookiesfriend 12.03.14 6:40pm
Mussolini nervous abut his heavenly train schedules

The ultimate Showdown...

Ironduke 12.03.14 6:08pm
Bono - Has he lost his Edge?

Over the years U2's frontman, Bono, has met with various World leaders, delivered lectures to groups of politicians,and generally raised the awareness of important issues such as poverty and famine....

Smart Alex 12.03.14 5:49pm
Smart Alex
Bob Crow Arrives In the Afterlife ...

.. and is frustrated to find that all the trains running perfectly on time, with no canellations or delays whatever, and with a full week-day service running every single day of the year includong...

Titus 12.03.14 5:46pm
Eric Pickles crashes mathematicians' conference in search of pi 0
sydalg 12.03.14 5:39pm
"Crow" Is "Work", Backwards

Well, it sounds like it is...

Titus 12.03.14 5:39pm
Adrian Bamforth
G4S Awarded Contract To Investigate The Met

So mad it might even become true...

Titus 12.03.14 5:20pm
Heaven is to be Divided into Semi-Autonomous Regions.

As the world is full of religious groups beating the crap out of each other, God has been forced to make some very tough decisions. It has been foreseen that entrants into paradise will be unable to...

Guillermo De Snookio 12.03.14 4:12pm
Psycadelic Squirrel
Churchill’s Speeches Remastered as PowerPoint Slides

As the Crimea threatens to turn into a global military adventure, Britain’s armed forces have revealed their latest scientific advance. “Britain is still a world leader in military...

deceangli 12.03.14 3:11pm
Milwall fans to pay tribute to Crow with match day disputes

Bob Crow, Britain’s favourite union leader, will be remembered by his fellow Milwall fans with a series of commemorative disputes at their Championship Derby game with Charlton Athletic this...

nickb 12.03.14 2:48pm
Carpenter's workshop searched for missing plane

Doffs cap to Dorsetboy...

Smart Alex 12.03.14 2:41pm
Smart Alex
The missing woman who joined the search party looking for her finds herself.

She'd been to Africa, but she'd never been to her...

Ian Searle 12.03.14 2:14pm
Missing plane found after woman drafted into search team 2
Bigglesworth 12.03.14 2:10pm
Malaysian Airlines plane wreckage found off South African coast

Oscar Pistorius has been charged with bringing down the Malaysian Airlines plane. A police spokesman said that, enraged by the day's court proceedings, Oscar took an anti-aircraft gun from his car...

Starchy 12.03.14 1:46pm
Mystery solved as great white shark on way to take on Co-op Bank’s C.E. role

A great white shark spotted crossing from one side of the Atlantic into the other is on its way to hold discussions with the board of directors at the Co-op Bank, says the head of the expedition...

Dick Everyman 12.03.14 1:34pm
Sir Lupus
Satire 'at an all time low' says government spokesman

Commenting on the release of this month's Government Satire Index (GSI) the main indicator on public perception of the governing party, the spokesman said it was at the lowest since records had begun...

throngsman 12.03.14 1:16pm
Miliband Will Offer EU Referndum - Except that He Won't

More wiggling to continue...

Titus 12.03.14 1:10pm
Rebekah - 'I assumed it was all made up'

In court today Rebekah Woods claimed she never challenged any of the information her reporters were bringing her because 'in all honesty I assumed it was made up anyway. Reporters are full of shit...

throngsman 12.03.14 1:09pm
Woman accidentally joins search party looking for herself

Full story here:,

custard cream 12.03.14 12:51pm
custard cream
Chris Tarrant has mini-stroke on plane. Is no-one safe from 1970s TV stars. 0
MADJEZ 12.03.14 12:28pm
GCHQ successfully decode "I may not have agreed with all he said but.."

"The tosser is dead"...

blacklesbianandproudofit 12.03.14 11:50am
Banks to introduce Novelty Sized Chip&Pin Cards to speed up donations

It is hoped that the introduction of new 'Novelty-Sized' Chip & Pin cards will shave up to four working days off charitable donations. Donors are assured that the new card will reduce queues at...

gaijintendo 12.03.14 11:32am
Science Question #69: Why is the sky blue?

a) because blue is Rupert Murdoch's favourite colour, b) it's air pollution, c) it can see what's going on down on the ground Perm any one from three. Further suggestions welcome...

deskpilot3 12.03.14 11:04am
Son of Barnabas
Bob Crow goes underground for the last time

He got to the end of the line...

Son of Barnabas 12.03.14 10:27am
Son of Barnabas
New Zealand to remove one star from flag as part of shake-up 0
Bigglesworth 12.03.14 9:46am
Noel Edmonds to relaunch career on Indian TV - 'Dhall or No Dhall'.

Can't wait...

BigStevieB 12.03.14 9:30am
Director of 'Noah' accused of plagiarism as ark hits iceberg 0
sydalg 12.03.14 8:58am