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Scottish ex-hairdresser admits being "shit at curling" 0
Underconstruction 20.02.14 8:27pm
Salmond plays down talk of future Kingship

Standing at the mantelpiece in the great hall of his residence at Scone, the Scottish leader Mr Salmond refused to be drawn on suggestions that once Scotland was free from the English yoke, he would...

blacklesbianandproudofit 20.02.14 7:58pm
Met Police on exchange visit to Ukraine show how it's done

World War Three soon...

vulture1 20.02.14 6:48pm
Brooks: admits speaking evil; denies seeing or hearing evil. 0
Ref Minor 20.02.14 6:15pm
Ref Minor
Old blues guitarist who employed extinct bird claims, "Got My Dodo Working"

(gets coat)...

Smart Alex 20.02.14 6:12pm
Smart Alex
Salmond Swimming Against the Currency

Scotland’s First Minister is heading upstream to die. In the more remote areas of the country, he will spawn a multitude of new ideas that may never make it to the Sargasso Sea...

Guillermo De Snookio 20.02.14 5:26pm
Cameron Returns from Trip to Influence the Floating Voter

Whilst some thought he was on the level, others tried to eggim on to get subs for those in difficulties. Unlike Lord Smith of Dredgemoor he did at least wear wellies, on his visits...

Guillermo De Snookio 20.02.14 5:26pm
Guillermo De Snookio
First floods, now earthquakes, West Country on standby for a plague of frogs. 3
Ian Searle 20.02.14 5:15pm
sponge finger
Danish giraffes advise English cousin to "keep a low profile" 0
sydalg 20.02.14 5:03pm
TV’s Handy Andy now just plain Andy

The wife of ‘Handy Andy’, DIY expert in popular BBC show Changing Rooms, has revealed people should refer to her husband as just Andy, since it’s 'far more factually correct'. Long-suffering...

dicky37 20.02.14 5:00pm
Passenger suffers terminal illness in airport. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 20.02.14 4:28pm
Blair to Brooks - 'Say Milly Dowler had WMD' 3
Electrelane 20.02.14 3:31pm
Channel 5 immigration debate ends in consensus

Channel 5's 'The Big British Immigration Row' has resolved the issue of immigration to everyone's satisfaction. After a robust discussion, participants compiled a list of appropriate actions in...

Adrian Bamforth 20.02.14 2:53pm
NB admin to close self aggrandisement loop hole - 23

NB administrators have warned contributors that in future they will have just two opportunities to bump their own subs before being blocked from responding to comments left by fellow contributors.,...

Gerontius 20.02.14 2:44pm
Ex-pat Connery clashes with ex-pat Bowie over Scotland vote

Equally as relevant...

Coco 20.02.14 2:38pm
Kevin the Swan
Somerset to use dredged material to fill hole left by Bristol Channel earthquake 0
Ian Searle 20.02.14 2:19pm
Ian Searle
6'7" immigrant found waving large sword avoids deportation citing He-man rights 3
m4x 20.02.14 12:40pm
Bowie thrilled with consecutive Brits win following 10,950 day trip in space 0
m4x 20.02.14 12:22pm
French baker with broken leg crosses pain threshold by running in to work 0
m4x 20.02.14 12:05pm
Short men to be given compulsory leg extensions on NHS as pub aggression worsens 0
m4x 20.02.14 11:41am
Farage must make his mind up, says Cameron, as Ukraine fights for EU membership 0
m4x 20.02.14 10:20am
Cameron - 'The poor simply refuse to eat' 0
Electrelane 20.02.14 10:04am
Brown's warning on Old Age Pensions "not really that relevant " to Scots

Thanks Sinnick...

Scots Al 20.02.14 9:39am
Sinkhole opens up in Katie Hopkins face

A five inch sinkhole has today been discovered just above the chin and below the nose of shock pundit Katie Hopkins. As yet, no-one is available for comment - except Hopkins...

Milo Shame 20.02.14 9:07am
Decrease in Unemployment Reverses Negative Swing

Detractors of the confusing use of double negatives refuse to back down from their previous position, despite pressure from pessimists to reduce the void in their perceived state of denial...

Guillermo De Snookio 20.02.14 8:39am
Guillermo De Snookio
Fears grow for Cara Delevigne after photo blackout reaches second day

Worries fans are bombarding twitter with the hashtag #helpfindcara after she has failed to appear in a photo news story in the press for two consecutive days., The previously ubiquitous...

NewBiscuit 20.02.14 8:33am
Brits overrun waiting for Bowie to negotiate steps to stage with zimmer 1
irreverendJ 20.02.14 8:26am
Lens Cap
Fukushima residents disappointed not to have developed superpowers 0
Smart Alex 20.02.14 8:15am
Smart Alex
New Google LiveView maps let you wave at yourself 0
Dumbnews 20.02.14 6:51am
Alex Salmond said to be mildly pleased with recent Independence polling

[url=][/url], [url=]image upload[/url]...

camz 20.02.14 5:40am