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roybland 3 years
Shade of Florence Nightingale haunting Andrew Lansley 2
roybland 3 years

The ghost of Florence Nightingale is visiting beleaguered Health Secretary Andrew Lansley according to leaks from inside Downing Street. 'Miss Nightingale has been appearing to Andrew in the dead of...

Education chiefs blamed as tributes pour in for 'Legjend' Whitney. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
Crack cocaine in product recall after queen of vomit inducing pop found dead. 1
MADJEZ 3 years

Doctors are warning that crack may be harmful after the death of 80s pop diva Whitney Houston. The handy snack-sized narcotic produced in filthy kitchens by hardened drug dealers was previously...

“God may have chosen the Jews, but we still prefer Christians,” say Lions 0
nickb 3 years

In exhaustive scientific tests in North Africa, lions have expressed an overwhelming preference for Christian human flesh, with levels of appreciation unchanged since the heyday of big cat/ Christian...

Los Angeles hotel seeks bodyguard 0
yussle 3 years
Andrew "Pontius Pilate" Lansley washes NHS-cut blood off hands- and blames GPs 0
wolfie 3 years

Mr Lansley was late to the interview, after a failed attempt to cut petrol costs by making his driver push the car, and steer it, at the same time. He was also taken aback by the coffee served by the...

Whitney Houston joins the Forever 48 Club. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Quadriplegic’s to be put to work 2
Hooch 3 years

New plans to cut down benefits costs include putting Quadriplegic’s to work, it emerged last night. It is also expected that many will lose the social workers who care for them. A Government...

David Cameron says he's 'devastated for loss' speaking as MP for Whitney 0
Perks 3 years
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dvo4fun 3 years
Mob of peados lynch banker for 'perverse and unnatural behaviour' 0
Immunis 3 years
Sun workers clear desks after Murdoch pledges full support 1
apepper 3 years

Workers at the Sun have started looking for new jobs after Rupert Murdoch pledged his full support for the newspaper...

Bose launch baby-crying cancelling headphones 2
Dumbnews 3 years
Nazareth couple tell Levinson enquiry 'Bible scribes hacked their mobiles'. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
The NewsBicuit Crossword 1
Smart Alex 3 years
Coach party surprise head-count results after touristvisit to the Fukushima nucl 1
Smart Alex 3 years
Now praying in cars may be outlawed 0
roybland 3 years

Saying prayers in a motor vehicle could soon be illegal if the National Secular Society (NSS) gets its way. Flush from its successful court case to ban prayers at council meetings, the society now...

Government attacks ban on prayers; "praying is official treasury policy" 0
apepper 3 years

The government launched an attack on the ban of praying for councillors, "praying is pretty much our only official policy now, that and buying lottery tickets."...

City news: Exocet shares tipped, ahead of "Falklands 30th" 2
dvo4fun 3 years
Cameron's Old Nurse 'Goes All Bolshie'......... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

"David, go and wash that silly makeup off your face, this minute! You stupid boy!"...

PM gets down and dirty to promote Care 2
Drylaw 3 years

"All right who's next?" cried PM David Cameron as he deftly finished wiping the bottom of 87 year-old Effie Grace in the Sunny Lawns Care Home in Leicester yesterday. "That's you ready for the road,...

God stages political comeback by stint on "have I got news for you" 2
wolfie 3 years

merton to be partnered by a tub of hot crossed buns...

Argentina complains UK military build-up makes Falklands 'much harder to invade' 2
3 years
Argentina complains about unclear sub 3
Sinnick 3 years

Do I get the prize for most obscure pun of the day ?...

Greeks to Tax Strikes 0
ozythelabrador 3 years

German pressure has caused Greece to rethink methods of raising tax revenue in light of the 130bn Euro bailout being offered by the IMF. Prime Minister, Lucas Papademos, has today announced that...

Lions prefer ‘seasoned travellers’, study shows. 2
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

Salt, a pinch of pepper and a little nutmeg...

Harry Potter must wear hi-viz tabard over invisibility cloak, rules HSE 4
cinquecento 3 years
Chaos at funeral as mourners witness the deceased 'think out of the box' 0
pinxit 3 years
Airfix causes controversy with commemorative General Belgrano model set 4
borednow 3 years

Famous model kit manufacturer airfix today refused to apologise for it's controversial new model set which contains both the ARA General Belgrano and the submarine that sunk her HMS Conqueror. A...