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Cabinet to raise cash with "Dull Monty" strip act 0
FraserWords 3 years

Amid soaring fuel and food prices, Chancellor George Osborne revealed a dramatic plan to wipe out the national debt in one fell swoop: the Cabinet is going to form a male strip act and tour Northern...

Birkenstocks linked to e-coli outbreak 1
simonjmr 3 years
Apple launch new naval app - iiCaptain 0
John Wiltshire 3 years
Government to combat extremists by shooting them all 0
John Wiltshire 3 years
Crouch snapped kissing Scotland in club after declaring commitment to England 1
button 3 years
Apple to recall iPhone from UK as customers 'just not cool enough' for it 0
dicky37 3 years

Consumer electronics giant Apple last night issued the biggest recall of one of its products after citing a 'problem with the demographics', A statement issued by the company said "The latest iPhone...

Rastafarians eagerly await launch of 'I and I' pod. 0
be reasonable 3 years
Closure of twee bedding company blamed on lack of checks and valances 0
3 years
Organisers of Kilt Wearer's charity unicycle race insist on checks and balancers 0
3 years
Skype users unsure how to tell when service is broken 3
3 years

Skype users around the world have been left puzzled by Microsoft's announcement that the service is currently not working properly. A handful of users have complained that they have experienced...

Google announce plans to spread themselves 10% thinner 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Apple geeks anxiously anticipate launch of the iWoman 0
Dumbnews 3 years
'Cure' for obesity discovered: "move more and eat less", say experts. 0
be reasonable 3 years

More buns soon...

A. C. Grayling 'stoical' about smoke-bomb attack. 0
be reasonable 3 years
NY Sofitel 'disappointed' by Strauss-Kahn feedback on Trip Advisor 19
3 years

Strauss-Kahn, former head of the IMF, has left a scathing review of the Manhattan Sofitel on the popular travel website Trip Advisor. He was particularly critical of the in-room facilities, claiming...

Blue Peter launches Libyan Rebels ammunition appeal 1
LostLad 3 years

more soon (gonna write it in a bit!)...

George Osborne to cut population by 24% 7
Andrew 3 years

According to a leaked Treasury memo, the Chancellor George Osborne is planning to reduce the burden on public services by reducing the population by 24%. The memo stresses that the proposed cull...

Nursery worker admits to raping children, but denies sexualising them 0
Qoxiivi 3 years

Hopefully no more soon...

Spanish cucumbers and German bean sprouts to sue for libel. 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years
Cure for obesity depends on a post code lottery......Hmmmm fat chance! 0
arnied 3 years
Super Injection - The latest in Privacy Management Solutions 0
AdamSloan 3 years

Having problems keeping your misdemeanours private? Concerned about the impact that crazy night might have on your global earnings and sponsorship deals? Alarmed by recent social media and...

Steve Jobs to Personally Negotiate 
with St. Peter for the Rights to "iCloud" 0
mbalton 3 years

Apple CEO Steve Jobs is hastening his arrival at the Pearly Gates, so he can personally negotiate with St. Peter for the rights to the name “iCloud.” When Apple launched its new iCloud product...

Apple launch ‘new’ product – the iWheel 5
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Following on from the announcement of Apple’s iCloud service, and sticking with their policy of producing ‘new’ products that are remarkably similar to ones that are already available and then...

Meerkats seek name upgrade to Muchmorethankat 1
simonjmr 3 years
Halifax adverts rot the brain – official 3
Dick Everyman 3 years

The chief medical officer has written to the Advertising Standards Authority expressing concern that prolonged exposure to Halifax adverts is causing brain rot in the 18 to 65 year age group. ...

Bad light stops play at Snooker Finals. Organiser blames energy-efficient bulbs 15
pinxit 3 years
R.Cow Patz to star in Vampire Dairies 0
Dick Everyman 3 years

Teenage heart throb R.Cow Patz is to join the cast of ‘Vampire Dairies’ the latest incarnation in the popular genre of teen horror TV offerings. Set in darkest Shropshire it has been described...

Pollution at all-time high despite token recycling efforts; middle class baffled 12
pthr 3 years

Middle class couples everywhere were surprised and dismayed to learn that last year was the worst on record for global carbon emissions. For reasons that are not yet clear, household composting...

Fresh evidence leads to calls for a new inquiry into Humpty Dumpty tragedy 7
ronseal 3 years

Senior sources among all the Kings Army and All the Kings Men fear they are being hung out to dry, as a trial by media seeks a scapegoat for the tragic death of Humpty Dumpty. My Dumpty, known only...

Pensioner declares Starbucks coffee "worth every penny" 0
Re Pete 3 years

Agnes Meadows, an 83-year-old resident of Kilburn in North West London, shocked family and friends by insisting that the £3.19 Skinny Grande Vanilla Latte she bought in a local Starbucks was...