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Cameron To Sell Off Scotland To McDonalds....... 1
Jesse Bigg 3 years

."The Burghers of Edinburgh are lovely, dear."...

Ken Loach to direct Happy Feet “ The Heroin Years” 3
Gary Stanton 3 years

Ken Loach is to direct the sequel to Happy Feet after David Cameron called on the UK film industry to produce more blockbuster movies and less depressing shit about council estates. Cameron said...

Alton Towers unveil new 'Coalition Coaster' 8
Perks 3 years

Alton Towers have today unveiled the latest thrill ride in their collection. The 'Coalition Roller Coaster' has been launched as the theme park's most ambitious ride yet with many twist and turns,...

Scots to vote on independence from Westminster... 2
Smart Alex 3 years

subsidising their free university places, free prescriptions, free elderly care, etc...

UK to be renamed "The Untied Kingdom". More soon. 0
Al OPecia 3 years
Scots independence latest: Tartan Army applies to join NATO 1
Stan 3 years
Cinema-goers excited over 3D version of film about invisible aliens 7
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

With sci-fi blockbuster ‘The Darkest Hour’, based on an invasion by hostile aliens who cannot be seen, set to hit the UK’s cinemas this weekend excitement is building amongst film fans, eager...

British film industry urged to focus more on pornography and wizards 4
3 years

Britain's film industry is facing a radical overhaul, as ministers urged studios to stop making arty, elitist guff that can only be understood by philosophy students and focus more on wizards,...

George Michael and Michael Barrymore lined up for Celebrity Bog Browser 0
ronseal 3 years
Gardener Loses Plot. - 2 44
sredni vashta 3 years

Or, if you prefer, Solicitor Loses Will...

BBC wins in legal bid to film torture, Attenborough keen to narrate 0
irregular apple 3 years
Gary Glitter spotted on Greek holiday 0
irregular apple 3 years
Coalition urges Brits to select winning numbers for EuroMillions 0
irregular apple 3 years
Cameron keen to introduce tax breaks for philistines 0
irregular apple 3 years
Tesco security staff wary as hundreds more little chefs fall on hard times 14
Qoxiivi 3 years

Security staff at Tesco are bracing themselves for a massive shoplifting spree of miniature proportions following reports that hundreds more ‘little chefs’ have fallen on hard times. ‘We are...

Psychiatrists say Michael Gove just doesn't add up 0
roybland 3 years
Habitable planets in Milky Way 0
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

accidentally eaten by hungry trucker. More soon...

Scotland to be released on compassionate grounds 6
ianslat 3 years

Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced that Scotland is to be released from Britain on the grounds of ill-health. Legal advisers for the country, which was sentenced to be part of Great...

Heston Services keen to distance itself from Blumenthal 0
Scroat 3 years

"We serve simple, basic shite, instead of poncy, expensive pseudo-scientific shite," a spokesman said today...

Little Chef to be known as Nano Chef 0
roybland 3 years

little more follows...

Scottish freedom fighters fail because of 'funny money' 1
Perks 3 years

Today, it has emerged, that a group calling themselves the Scottish Transitional Council have returned back to Glasgow following a failed attempt to fight in England to achieve liberation and...

Silicone implant firm now accused of supplying dodgy false testicles 17
MrQ 3 years

In a new twist to the ongoing breast implant fiasco, the French firm that made them is facing fresh allegations that it supplied substandard prosthetic testicles to the NHS. Some 20,000 men worldwide...

Superdry launch 'brand shy' clothing range 0
roybland 3 years

International urban clothing company Superdry has announced a fashion range for customers who are brand shy. 'We recognize that there are some people who prefer not to wear a jacket with our name...

Iranian nuclear scientists to be issued with plastic Noddy cars. 0
MrQ 3 years

Iranian nuclear officials have sanctioned the purchase to 300 children’s Noddy cards to counter the threat from magnetic car bombs, suspected of belonging to Mossad or Western intelligence...

‘Scotland, go Independent or be Scuttled’ says Whitehall 0
Immunis 3 years

Alex Salmond has hit out at the latest proposals from Whitehall to solve the Scottish problem, namely that the country should be either be made independent or towed out to sea and sunk., ‘This is...

Greenham Common Veterans To Train Anti-HS2 Activists...... 1
Jesse Bigg 3 years

..Birmingham to Leeds route activists to be trained via a spiritualist...

Bull Alex seeks freedom for 'his' herd of cows. Farmer David not concerned. 0
MrQ 3 years

In an interview, imposing bull Alex has stated his intention to seek independence from Farmer David, allowing him to sell the milk from the herd of prize cows he believes are his. "I have sired...

Homophobic tweet footballer Lee Steele faces the sack 1
medici2471 3 years
Metal thieves 'will need to work faster' as HS2 gains approval 1
MrQ 3 years

Scrap merchants between London and Birmingham are expecting to be dealing with a new breed of metal thief in future as the Government confirms plans for HS2. We contacted a dealer in Kenilworth who...

Celebrity Big Brother to feature real celebrities 3
JonnyJP 3 years

Hopefully, no more soon...