Topic — Add New » Comments Votes Author Last Comment
Prisoners to use potatoes as currency

In the wake of the proposed ban on smoking, inmates at Belmarsh are to adopt the humble ‘spud’ as the preferred medium of barter while in prison. Economists are aware that the penal system...

0
Wrenfoe 20.09.13 9:30am
Wrenfoe
TV channels announce their Christmas Day schedules

All channels today released their exciting festive lineups of innovative and imaginative programmes for this coming Christmas Day. The BBC schedule is: Early morning - 3.00 pm: Antiques In The...

3
John Wiltshire 20.09.13 8:38am
Wicked Lady
Freshly Washed Tramp Charged With Fragrancy 11
Flugelbinder 20.09.13 8:36am
Jesus H
cHAOS aND pANIC bREAK oUT aS mAN lOSES kEY tO cAPS lOCK

rESTORATION oF cAPITAL pUNISHMENT cALLED fOR...

1
Titus 20.09.13 8:17am
Flugelbinder
Men who took control of Barclays computer for £million theft were the staff

Police have revealed that the gang who took over a Barclays Bank computer to make millions of pounds actually work for Barclays. DI Ron Barnaby of the Met Police Fraud Squad, who headed the...

1
John Wiltshire 20.09.13 8:14am
Flugelbinder
Bee keepers to be banned from wearing face veils 3
Squudge 20.09.13 7:02am
Coco
Threat Of Prison Smoking Ban Leads To Sudden Massive Drop In Crime 1
Titus 20.09.13 6:48am
Squudge
Prison smoking ban threat: Inmates demand access to outside space 2
Boutros 20.09.13 6:47am
Squudge
Prison Drug Dealers Welcome Smoking Ban - 'Less Competition For Us'. 0
Titus 20.09.13 6:47am
Titus
Russian Security Forces Engage In 'Direct Action' Against Greenpeace In Arctic

"We tried peaceful campaigning" said the Russians "But they simply ignored us...

0
Titus 20.09.13 6:23am
Titus
New Adobe flash player most secure ever since it never works 0
Dumbnews 20.09.13 4:08am
Dumbnews
Men with colds nap to avoid symptoms turning into man flu

is this a Neat-O...

0
irreverendJ 19.09.13 10:15pm
irreverendJ
Ed Milliband to star in remake of The Invisible Man. 0
deskpilot3 19.09.13 10:12pm
deskpilot3
Police will no longer cover the faces of dead bodies

That's enough of that now...

0
Not Amused 19.09.13 10:08pm
Not Amused
MOT getting easier, complains Daily Mail Motoring Section 0
sydalg 19.09.13 9:48pm
sydalg
Morgan Stanley to give $920m of quantitative easing funds back to US Government. 0
Eskimo 19.09.13 9:43pm
Eskimo
Vets to be banned from wearing veils

It is vital that vets are able to give visual reassurance to their patients, many of whom will be owned by sensitive little souls. This particularly applies to kittens and big fluffy rabbits. The...

0
rogerg 19.09.13 9:38pm
rogerg
Syrian Rebels Suddenly Portayed As Al Qaeda After UK Decides Not To Attack Assad 0
Titus 19.09.13 8:59pm
Titus
Blatter announces 2022 World Cup to be split between Qatar and Siberia

FIFA president Sepp Blatter announced today that the 2022 World Cup would be split between Qatar (temperature 50C), and Siberia (temperature -20C), bringing the average temperature down to a balmy...

1
blacklesbianandproudofit 19.09.13 8:52pm
Titus
Children told to play card game outside despite worsening weather

Not sure I am doing this right...

1
nickb 19.09.13 5:12pm
AReader
Police to remove trousers before giving evidence.

Courts should be able to order constables to remove their trousers in court, a judge decreed today. Justice Bludgeon (96) believes it is important that juries have the right to see the style and...

13
Boutros 19.09.13 3:57pm
Richard Bingham
Scrumper Left Speechless As Adam Reclaims Apple 1
Flugelbinder 19.09.13 2:55pm
Flugelbinder
Head of match-fixing syndicate wins bet after being arrested in Singapore

The head of a syndicate which bribes people to fix the results of matches today won a reported $69 million after he was arrested in Singapore by officer David Lee of the Singapore police at 16:37...

1
John Wiltshire 19.09.13 2:55pm
AReader
Ukip conference delegates will wear full-face veils

Some delegates to Ukip's annual conference say they will wear a full-face veil to conceal their embarrassment at being a Ukip member. 'I'm not really keen on anyone discovering I'm a member,' said...

0
roybland 19.09.13 2:38pm
roybland
Confusion In Leeds Bradford Airport Over Pilot Drinking Scheme 0
Flugelbinder 19.09.13 2:29pm
Flugelbinder
"I Thought It Was Arthritis" Claims 79 Year Old Stabbing Victim

A 79 Year old man from Devon is recovering in Hospital after being stabbed several times in the neck, hands and leg by a 72 year old lady. "I have had arthritis for years" said Arthur Golightly from...

0
Flugelbinder 19.09.13 12:55pm
Flugelbinder
‘Drunk Tanks’ to replace Government ‘Think Tanks’

The Association of Chief Police Officers (ACPO) has suggested that the UK’s lubricated revellers could be used to generate future Coalition strategy. By attaching a series of monitoring devices to...

6
Wrenfoe 19.09.13 12:26pm
Jesus H
iPhone user has 'out-of-phone experience' in-between operating systems

iPhone dependent Michael Potter has spoken of a bizarre 'human-like experience' today, when a delay in his download of iOS 7 to his iPhone 5 left him perilously exposed to the real world, with no...

5
Jesus H 19.09.13 12:01pm
Jesus H
One In Three Behind On Rent Since Sky Prices Increase

Since the first of April this year when housing benefits were reduced, a reported one in three tenants in social housing have fallen into arrears on their rent. Mrs Chelsea Flatley of Rotherham told...

1
Flugelbinder 19.09.13 11:33am
Robopop
Mafia Boss Applauds Neat-O Anagram Entry

Neat-O, too subtle?...

1
Flugelbinder 19.09.13 11:30am
beau-jolly