Topic — Add New » Comments Votes Author Last Comment
Party Whip Withdrawn From Woman MP Caught Cleaning Behind Her Fridge

"I can't understand what came over me" sobbed shame-faced Elsie Bigham, who has been a passionate feminist, left-wing campaigner and MP for Northern contituency Coaldale East for 12 years. "I was at...

Titus 22.09.13 12:31am
One in ten fire-fighters 'not fit enough' to be novelty strippers

Hen parties, tree-bound felines and infernos throughout the UK have been put at risk by the paucity of ‘fit’ fire-fighters. Those in active service are expected to pass strident examinations in...

Wrenfoe 22.09.13 12:03am
"Straight talking" Godfrey Bloom announced as new Mail columnist. 1
Ref Minor 21.09.13 9:54pm
Labour fears that one man could destroy conference

Labour officials say they are worried that one man could ruin the party's annual conference meeting this week in Brighton. 'We're very concerned that this man could single-handedly wipe-out all the...

roybland 21.09.13 5:26pm
Artist makes DNA double helix structure with brussel sprouts and cocktail sticks

“As the sprouts decay, I wanted to show the pointlessness of art, life and me.” Immediately receives £100,000 grant from Arts Council and nominated for Turner Prize. “My next project involves...

farmer giles 21.09.13 5:16pm
farmer giles
Hashtag "undeserved" claims dope-smoking Tweeter 0
brownpaperreporter 21.09.13 5:05pm
New US law: gun buyer must have approval of "at least two voices in his head" 4
sydalg 21.09.13 5:00pm
Artist promises to stop suffering for his art and just learn how to draw

An artist from London, who has been stoically suffering for his art for a decade claims he recently had a sudden epiphany. 'I've slept in bed sits covered in suspicious stains, sold priceless...

TobiasBV 21.09.13 3:52pm
Celebration as woman finds Tupperware lid in record time

A Stockport woman was celebrating yesterday as she managed to locate the correct Tupperware lid in less than 15 seconds., “I’m over the moon!” panted Maureen Vine, 54. “I’ve tried all...

Sfox 21.09.13 3:20pm
Damian McBride voted Most Inspirational Troll at the Young Online Bully awards

Damian McBride's new book, Power Troll, looks set to scoop a handful of awards as his behaviour has proved an inspirational example to Britain's next generation of bullies. McBride was hailed as...

ronseal 21.09.13 3:04pm
Grand Theft Auto stabbing suspects "3 stars" claims police spokesman. 0
Ref Minor 21.09.13 2:15pm
Ref Minor
Scottish farmer sells his old paperbacks: admits too many books spoil the croft 0
Smart Alex 21.09.13 2:05pm
Smart Alex
Near miss denied by American official stating 'Noo clear near miss'

or something like that...

Pharcite 21.09.13 1:54pm
Yoga leader resigns as position becomes untenable 0
Pharcite 21.09.13 1:27pm
Twelve year old boy has mid-life crisis

Says he doesn't see the point. Parents apparently complained that he 'isn't even old enough to know how bad life gets.'...

TobiasBV 21.09.13 12:48pm
‘Team GB’ rebranded as ‘Team B’ for next Summer Olympics

In a surprise move, the British Olympic Association has dropped the ‘Great’ due to the impending departure of Scotland from the Union next year. Sebastian Coe, chairman of the BOA said “Well...

rogerg 21.09.13 12:15pm
ITV increases ad-break time to combat cheap commercialism

Bosses say increased ad-breaks were the only option they could think of to maintain some semblance of artistic dignity, on what they were quick to proudly point out is still one of the top four...

TobiasBV 21.09.13 11:50am
Mr Big arrested - "wishes he'd changed his name"

Police have arrested eight people in connection with a Barclays bank computer hijack scam including "Mr Big". A police spokesman explained; "They would have got away with it if the leader hadn't used...

apepper 21.09.13 8:02am
Low take up of Costa Concordia's bargain economy cabins

custard cream 21.09.13 6:28am
Apple tackles pirate demographic with new iPatch.

Since we're doing i-things again...

Maverick 20.09.13 11:07pm
Nigel Farage refutes claims of cynical ploy to attract feminist vote 1
Coco 20.09.13 10:16pm
Chemical Arms Not as Good as Real Arms, says disappointed Bionic Assad. 0
Ablative Fabsolute 20.09.13 8:25pm
Ablative Fabsolute
Bankers "to reveal their horns" in court 4
nickb 20.09.13 7:04pm
UKIP membership quintruples as british men learn party "is full of sluts".

Memberhip expected to top 15 million by Monday. More soon...

miked10270 20.09.13 6:42pm
Shock as man buys magazine in WH Smith

Sales Assistant Fiona McAndrew was left in a state of shock today after a man bought a magazine in the Trowbridge branch of WH Smith. Speaking to reporters, she said that the man approached her...

John Wiltshire 20.09.13 6:33pm
Crick hit latest: Bloom bats. 0
Woundedpride 20.09.13 6:14pm
Firemen's strike due to overwhelming demands of second job. 0
Ref Minor 20.09.13 5:57pm
Ref Minor
Boy goes to party scared people will talk to him, leaves feeling sad they didn't 0
TobiasBV 20.09.13 4:32pm
Lecturer admits he only uses big-words to assert power

After several months of assaulting his students with such arcane vernacular as 'weltanschauung' and 'peripeteia', an English professor at an unnamed Oxbridge college was outed by a student recently,...

TobiasBV 20.09.13 4:28pm
Ryanair to end 'Abrupt Culture' immediately 0
Flugelbinder 20.09.13 2:47pm