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Co-op undertakers in takeover bid refuse to undertake transfer of undertakings 1
Sinnick 3 years
Man U buy Everest double glazing in transfer window mix-up 2
apepper 3 years

more to follow...

CERN disappointed as Godot particle doesn't turn up 0
Sinnick 3 years
Hard pressed Royals to holiday abroad more often next year 0
medici2471 3 years

- more soon...

Drunken advance on own mother blamed on iPhone autocorrect 5
Pabst Blue Ribbon 3 years

Local teenager Michael Hedges became the latest matriphiliac able to back out of an Oedipal sexual advance toward his own mother by blaming the autocorrect function on his iPhone. "I withdrew the...

malgor 3 years
Dawkins boson found by CERN known as the 'probably no God' particle 2
Username 3 years
Attenborough quits after HD footage reveals Steiff button in polar bear's ear 6
3 years
Scientists capture first glimpse of elusive Clegg boson 13
Ludicity 3 years

Scientists believe they may have recorded their first sighting of the elusive sub-political particle, the Clegg boson, otherwise known as The Sod Particle. The Clegg’s existence has been...

Google Street View controversy following publication of gypsy destruction 0
PReady 3 years

Many users of popular online stalking facility Google Street View have shown horror at the release of new digital images of the devastation caused by the participants of the TV documentary ‘Big Fat...

Mary Portas launches latest plan to get people back in High Streets, more riots! 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Economy Statistic Increases/Decreases more than expected 0
Smaug 3 years

There were fresh fears of a double-dip recession today as the Bank of England revealed an alarming new statistic on the UK economy. In response, the governor of the Bank of England, Mervyn King,...

Frozen Planet Penguins Merely "Happy Feet Rejects" 5
PReady 3 years

The BBC were in the firing line again today after investigative reporters found that they had used actors in a recent production of Frozen Planet. Eight million viewers had been led to believe the...

Derren Brown to perform normal magic tricks in "Touch of the Bald" C4 show 0
Iamthestig 3 years

Not satisfied with hypnosis that drives people to Maim, steel and predict the future, Derren Brown is set to unleash his most controversial televisual extravaganza in time for 2012. In his new...

Pimps bemoan students’ lack of sex skills 0
ianslat 3 years

Despite figures today showing that record numbers of students are finding work in the sex industry, leading figures within the industry have joined forces today to call for improvements in the...

Frankie Boyle and Ricky Gervais found at end of punch-line. 1
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

Kick-queue already forming...

Peter Jones and Duncan Bannatyne win right to perform as ‘PJ and Duncan’ 7
dicky37 3 years

After a long legal battle two of the entrepreneurs from Dragons’ Den have acquired the exclusive rights to perform under the moniker made famous by Ant and Dec in the 90s. The ruling will see the...

UK inflation falls to only 3 times the average salary increase 5
virtuallywill 3 years

and no more later...

Student awarded honarary BJ(Hons) by punters 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Mystery bidder splashes out for pearl necklace 2
tedweasel 3 years

I thought that I was more mature than this. Clearly not., I'll be on the Naughty Chair...

Channel 4 admits that My Big Fat Paedophile Wedding "was a bit too racey" 1
kimllfixit 3 years
Universities to start offering degree programs in Mobile phone plans 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Skeptics doubt claim that Canada was member of Kyoto Protocol 0
DorsetBoy 3 years

New claims that Canada was once a member of Kyoto Protocol have been greeted with widespread skepticism. Writing in the non-peer-reviewed journal Tin Hat Wearers Monthly, Screaming "Lord"...

Cameron now worth 86 pence. 0
Boutros 3 years
Jose Manuel Barroso in plea for Britons to be "more European". 4
virtuallywill 3 years

David William Donald Cameron and Edward Samuel Miliband both say they are committed to the UK not being on the edge of Europe, though physically we are., However Nicholas William Peter Clegg...

Jonny Wilkinson retires to spend time on his new condom and shaving business 4
charlies_hat 3 years
People flock to Edinburgh Zoo to view pair of kiddies pyjama cases 0
Smart Alex 3 years
Frozen Planet team forced to admit incidental music 'added in after filming' 0
Smart Alex 3 years

Daily Mail angry that readers might be given the impression that large numbers of smal orchestras inhabit the polar regions...

Huhne: "Playing 'Billy No Mates' is not fun or effective; we Lib Dems know!" 0
MT Bucket 3 years
Vicar faces jail for arranging sham marriage between Lib Dems and Tories. 0
MT Bucket 3 years