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TV Ratings News: Foxy Knoxy Knocked Off the Box by Cocky Foxy 0
Drylaw 3 years
New Apple boss admits defeat, considers quitting 10
Pabst Blue Ribbon 3 years

Struggling fruit manager, Juliette Cavaillier, has admitted her best efforts to motivate her department of apples have come up short, and has labelled the fruit 'completely unresponsive'....

Alistair Darling made a cup of tea for himself, and didn't ask if I wanted one.. 8
ronseal 3 years

Spin doctor Alistair Campbell has tearfully put the record straight and delivered a devastating critique of former chancellor Alistair Darling's personality. Whispering out the side of his mouth to...

Aspiration magazine identifies Ten Lists You Must Make 5
ronseal 3 years

Aspiration Magazine has identified the Ten Must-List topics that EVERY person must itemise - before they die. Seven Ways to Create a List comes high in the running order to To Do (Or Die) subjects -...

Pot charged over racial abuse 2
button 3 years
English Haka plan surprises rugby world 5
suki 3 years

The English rugby team has surprised the rugby world again after confirming it will perform its own version of the Haka at the quarter final match against France. After the decision to wear black...

Odds on finding Gadaffi are a dead Sirte say bookmakers 4
charlies_hat 3 years
Cuts of "up to one third" announced at the BB. 4
Al OPecia 3 years
Tories revealed to be "no longer keen on Fox-hunting". More soon 0
Al OPecia 3 years
delightfullyodd 3 years

The BBC today have announced that pop-sensation, Peter Andre, is to be the new host of flagship quiz show Mastermind. The news comes on the back of a radical shake up by the publicly owned...

Cameron To Hold Big Sex Romp At Number 10...... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

.To cover up Tories latest economic gaff and Liam Fox's fiasco...

British team reaches rugby semi-finals. 1
Ostsee 3 years
GMT rethink - 'Octuple Summer Time' urged for UK’s health 11
Golgo13 3 years

With new reports claiming nearly two-thirds of Britons are overweight or obese – making us the fattest country in Europe – health experts are suggesting that putting our clocks forward 8 hours...

Des O'Connor Christmas Album "Only safe bet to get Jacko off" states Doc 0
Drylaw 3 years
Government feud 'started by tie snipping' 0
kga6 3 years

Spiritual differences between the small subgroup of people who call themselves politicians, known to the wider folk as the 'Pain People', have led to a feud in which members snip each others ties....

Wayne Rooney stunned as everyone in world named Rooney arrested 0
Clarky 3 years

‘We thought it would save time to question all of them,’ a police spokesperson said, ‘just in case.’...

Emo responsible for Moody cuts 2
button 3 years
Mouse swapper taken to court over bullying charges 4
Screenie 3 years

A gentleman from Essex who replaced a work colleague's computer mouse with a real live version has been taken to court over allegations of bullying. His victim, 29 year old Todd Begswick, is still...

Werritty cherrity verritty sought 0
nickb 3 years

..will hilerritty follow?...

Taliban to impove image by reimagining "West Side Story".. 3
Al OPecia 3 years

"Gee Officer Corruptka", "I once knew a law called Sharia", "Who wants to belive in America?"...

Steve Jobs riP. 10
Al OPecia 3 years
World conker championship organisers blame cancellation on shoestring budget. 0
spoole2112 3 years

More later...

Cuts Latest : BBC to repeat 2008 Olympics in 2012 3
medici2471 3 years
Red carded Roonie "will be kicking himself" predicts dad. 4
Boutros 3 years
Fans celebrate Euro 2012 qualification with impromptu shindig 0
3 years
Rooney Snr wins bet on Rooney Jnr being sent off in 71st minute 2
Sinnick 3 years
Sighting of Nessie in Thames, was not David Walliams 1
witless 3 years

A rare Loch Ness monster sibling has been sighted in the River Thames deep into London for the first time last week. Although normally associated with the Loch in Scotland, this is the first time the...

Jobs' mourning suits now available in white. 0
Boutros 3 years

More later...

Cyber-Shocker: Steve Jobs Dies Just Like Everyone Else 9
rikkor 3 years

Steve Jobs will always be remembered for the billions of dollars he donated to alleviate human suffering worldwide. Sorry, wait. That was someone else. Steve Jobs will always be remembered for...

Peter749400 3 years

Despite heroically diving in front of a lorry to save an old lady from being run over, Good samaritan and local charity worker Dave Hitchens was somehow, still an arsehole, it emerged last night. ...