Topic — Add New » Comments Votes Author Last Comment
Met Office warns of severe delays to TV "personal journeys" 0
Bigglesworth 05.01.14 10:22pm
Gove's latest crock of shit "over by Christmas".

In a communique from his luxurious Chateau some miles from the front line, Field Marshal Sir Paul Hogmanay Dacre has given his full backing to his C in C General Sir Alexander Douglas Gove in his...

blokefromstoke 05.01.14 8:39pm
You say B.O. Are eye pea. Claims Google autofill.

Morecambe Soon yi Previn and other stuff you didn't actually type...

MADJEZ 05.01.14 8:33pm
Perfect Kitten-Drowning Weather Hits Britain

With the UK currently experiencing abnormally stormy weather, which has resulted in flooding across the country with more forecast in the coming weeks, experts and members of the public are agreed it...

tryptophan 05.01.14 8:24pm
Men demand access to new register of breast implants

It's only fair...

gavin 05.01.14 8:18pm
Midfield Diamond
British Isles To Be Floated Off To The Antipodes, In The Hope Of Better Weather

and an opportunity for England to learn how to play cricket., [i]Oh the shame, the humiliation. And I don't even [/i]like[i] cricket.[/i]...

Titus 05.01.14 4:51pm
Hospitalised optimist expected to make half-full recovery.

50% more soon...

sredni vashta 05.01.14 3:58pm
sredni vashta
Gerry Anderson ‘did Apollo 11 lunar module lift off in 1969’ admits NASA

Filmed using the special ‘Supermarionation’ process, the historic ‘small step and giant leap’ global superpower propaganda con was masterminded by the rocket puppetry genius and his special...

farmer giles 05.01.14 3:28pm
farmer giles
England cricket team worried they "might draw Scotland" in 2015 World Cup. 0
Al OPecia 05.01.14 3:03pm
Al OPecia
The Coen brothers' "Inside Windsor Davis" not up to usual standard. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 05.01.14 1:35pm
Guitar sales and Wonga loans double over festive season

More Bbmaj7 soon...

Scroat 05.01.14 1:26pm
Paul McKenna gains weight and starts smoking - fans brand him a hypnocrit

.. for Titus :)...

Yikes 05.01.14 12:58pm
Ref Minor
Dim-witted Elbow fans rush to buy latest Arse album 0
Idiot 05.01.14 12:09pm
Food banks ‘too big to fail’ warns think tank

UK food banks have become so large and interconnected they cannot possibly be allowed to fail claims an independent think tank., Writing in The Economist, Bank of England Chairman Mark Carney agreed...

Gerontius 05.01.14 10:55am
England cricket team: losing is part of the bigger plan

As they trudged off with an alarming swagger after a 5-0 series drubbing, Alistair Cooke and his right hand and er left hand men, Belly and Kevo, began to give TV interviews. Cookie, as he is still...

Makkers1 05.01.14 10:18am
Environment Agency to be abolished following failure to stop tide coming in

As temperate Britain transforms into a storm battered bastion offset from the ‘continent', British Government are throwing in the very soggy towel. Despite the Environment Agency and council...

marymole 05.01.14 9:59am
Outrage As Tories Bribe Voters Most Likely To Actually Turn Out And Vote

i.e., pensioners. Isn't democracy terrible! [Cackles gleefully all the way to the bank]...

Titus 05.01.14 9:12am
Huge Crowds Flock To Storm-Lashed Coast To Watch Spectators Getting Washed Away 0
Titus 05.01.14 9:05am
England Cricket Team To Re-Fashion Their Bats…..

…Into baseball bats….. Can't get any worse, surely?...

Jesse Bigg 05.01.14 8:50am
Jesse Bigg
Curmudgeon Resents Lack Of New Year Greeting Equivalent To 'Bah! Humbug!'

Suggestions invited. I am minded to parody the Who's [i]Won't Get Fooled Again, [/i], #[i] "Meet the new year, Same as the old year" [/i]#, - that...

Titus 05.01.14 8:31am
"Which idiot made this website?", asks idiot 0
Dumbnews 05.01.14 5:19am
Omnivores who refuse to eat horse branded hippocrits 6
Yikes 05.01.14 1:07am
Vatican Bank Launches Online Money System PaPal 2
Iggy Pop-Barker 04.01.14 11:13pm
‘Immigrants get it too easy’, says man after having personal debts written off

A man from Barnet has passionately reiterated his views that immigrants ‘exploit the system for their own personal gain’ today, whilst celebrating his successful application to have most of his...

Jesus H 04.01.14 10:45pm
Midfield Diamond
Stranded ice-breaker crew "getting on really well" 6
Idiot 04.01.14 10:13pm
I of W sends state of the art flood defence aid in form of sponges to mainland

Extra absorbent paper towels on standby if required...

irreverendJ 04.01.14 10:04pm
Wimbledon Common confirms Great Uncle Bulgaria now able to claim UK benefits. 1
bonjonelson 04.01.14 9:00pm
Morrissey accidentally eats half a chicken sandwich in Nandos.

I wish, with every fibre of my being, that this would come true...

bonjonelson 04.01.14 7:19pm
Everlys get well soon aid for Schu

In the heartwarming human interest story of the year so far, it has emerged that just before Phil Everly sadly died yesterday due to smoking too many fags, the Everly Brothers had recorded a special...

Damien_H 04.01.14 6:25pm
Public hope Jim Davidson does 'Chalky' routine for Evander Holyfield

In a show normally reserved for thick people and people wanting to feel superior to thick people, the Nation is currently hoping Celebrity Big Brother contestant Jim Davidson will perform his comedy...

David K 04.01.14 6:23pm
David K