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Claimants to wear benefit caps 6
nickb 3 years

"I'm on benefits" and "Not working, just claiming" are two of the slogans the Department of Employment are planning for compulsory headgear to be worn by benefit claimants. "The so called benefits...

Super Hero degrees to be introduced to help reduce UK crime levels 7
Marko 3 years

At one time, every UK citizen was able to walk the streets safe at night without fear of attack. These days however, things are sadly different, with muggings in dark, unlit alleyways, knife crime...

Unemployed refused Chinese kitchen job "Wokshy". More soon. 1
Al OPecia 3 years
Health and Safety Laws to crackdown on emotional see-saws. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 3 years
Holland copies UK and introduces benefit Dutch caps 2
apepper 3 years

More to follow...

Chinese website caught selling fake placebo tablets. More soon. 3
Al OPecia 3 years
Women greenhouse executives complain of glass ceiling 0
apepper 3 years

More to follow...

'Plenty more fish in the sea,' jokes dumped fisherman 0
hughesroland 3 years
Archbishop calls for ban on different sex marriage 2
apepper 3 years

Archbishop of York, Dr John Sentamu, has called for the end of different sex marriage. "Were Adam and Eve married? Did Jesus get married? No. It's clear that the Bible is against marriage and the...

Ed Milliband To Undergo Surgery to Become Electable 2
Hooch 3 years

The Labour leader has long fought off accusations that his nerdish appearance would hinder his chances of winning the next election. Mr. Miliband often argued with his advisers that voters cared...

DHL to deliver Christmas presents in Seasonal Shake up. 0
virtuallywill 3 years

In a statement issued from his North Pole headquarters today Santa Clause has announced a sale of 49% of Christmas to a Group of several large multi-nationals and a Private equity buyer., The press...

Chaotic intermediary charged with Disorderly Conduit. 1
dvo4fun 3 years
Countdown's Susie Dent revealed to be a puppet. 1
WatcherMark 3 years

Only a few days after shocking the nation by showing a contestant submitting the word 'Wanker', Channel 4 are facing a fresh scandal against their flagship show Countdown (presented at the moment by...

Retired Nurse with woodwork O Level makes A&E unit out of Garden Shed 3
Marko 3 years

Retired Manchester nurse, Betty Doyle, 67, has used woodwork skills learned at Prestbury Modern over 30 years ago, to turn the shed in her back garden into a state of the art Accident and Emergency...

Other players "We would shake Terry's hand, if only he washed them after a piss" 1
dvo4fun 3 years
RBS Boss to be stripped of the title “Mr” 5
nickb 3 years

Stephen Hester, the RBS Chief Executive who will take a million pound bonus may forfeit the right to be called “Mr”, according to a Government committee which usually deals with knighthoods and...

Python cancels public speaking engagement due to frog in the throat 1
Smart Alex 3 years
Toyota accused of using Gene slicing and modifications to make hybrid cars 0
simonjmr 3 years
Wide screen TVs now affordable for people not on benefits... 0
Nick McCarr 3 years

(hat tip to NiB article)...

Deep fried bamboo shoots banned from Scottish zoos. 0
ght 3 years
Dignitas launch new reality TV travel show: Come Die With Me. 1
nickb 3 years
NHS Haggis Shortage Shuts Scottish Burns Unit 0
Mathna 3 years
Newt Gingrich’s Head To Apply For Statehood 0
Hooch 3 years

Following the the Republican candidates declaration that once 13,000 Americans live on the Moon they can attempt to become a state the colony that resides on his head believe they should too., The...

Robber demands, "Give me all the money or Ill write a negative review on Yelp" 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Czech sex predator allowed into UK says thanks. 3
Marko 3 years

Kajus Scuka, 48, who carried out a string of sex attacks after coming to Britain and claiming benefits, thanked UK immigration officials for letting him in as things had recently dried up back home,...

CERN announce 'possible black hole' if Prof. Brian Cox's head implodes 5
Perks 3 years

Scientists at CERN have revealed that fears of them creating a black hole where not totally unfounded however it would not be as a result of the Large Hadron Collider. The creation of the black hole...

Supermarket mayhem 2
Marko 3 years

There was carnage yesterday when short sighted pensioner Ethel Greenwood, 78, took a wrong turn with her shopping trolley, knocking down a carefully displayed stack of beans and a 'buy one get one...

Sheep in Wolves clothing is actually a Villa fan 0
Marko 3 years
Banks Boss Blasts Bullsh@tters 3
Marko 3 years

RBS boss, Stephen Hester, is speaking to lawyers, claiming defamation of character, as his payout was not £1 million as widely reported, but actually the modest sum of £963,000...

Keen marksman Anton Ferdinand receives bullet in post from caring fan. 2
MADJEZ 3 years

'They even carved my name in it, such a personal gift' said the appreciative footballer. More soon...