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"Bashar" Assad says, "School nickname means people get the wrong idea about me" 0
Scronnyglonkle 11.09.13 8:31am
Al-Qaida to use new Miley Cyrus Video in Recruitment Drive

“Talk about morally bankrupt,” said Abu Akthar Al-Zahari, head of Al-Aqaida’s Infidel Popular Culture Research Unit, and the man behind the latest effort to increase the organisation’s rank...

Ablative Fabsolute 11.09.13 8:18am
Phillip Fillop
Ed Milibands Labour Party key note conference speech leaked

“Some people call me the faceless cowboy, some call me the gangster of duff, some people call me David, cause they think that I am my bruv. People talk about me saying I’m doing it wrong all...

Scronnyglonkle 11.09.13 8:14am
“Apple must really hate me” says Apple fanboy...

Stephen Cox, 15, from Coventry, is unimpressed by Apple’s new offering, the iPhone 5S, and is taking the gadget’s launch as a personal affront. “It’s just the iPhone 5 with fingerprint...

Tripod 11.09.13 7:47am
KPMG Report claims HS2 will be faster than email

more later...

rogerg 11.09.13 6:49am
US to deploy Dr. Phil for psychological warfare against Bashar 0
Dumbnews 11.09.13 5:56am
Government admits the 'coalition' was just an elaborate YouTube hoax

Former school chums David Cameron and Nick Clegg have admitted the 2010 General Election result was a fake which they shot on home video in David's bedroom. The clip shows Nick 'working' - gyrating...

Ian Searle 11.09.13 5:49am
Ian Searle
Zuckerberg to solve Syrian crisis by changing everyone's profile picture 0
Dumbnews 11.09.13 5:30am
World Champion clairvoyant "knows palms like the back of his hand" 0
AReader 11.09.13 5:26am
Anniversary of 9/11 used to score points on social media

Special events took place across the globe today to commemorate the extraordinary human suffering and lost that occurred 12 years ago in New York City. The attacks on the World Trade Centre, the...

Hooch 11.09.13 12:19am
Study: Foil headgear significantly reduces likelihood of alien abduction

Scientists at Leuven university have discovered that aluminium foil helmets offer wearers protection from aliens. In a test carried out in Belgium over 2 years, not a single participant in the study...

Silver 10.09.13 10:15pm
Barrister performs open-heart surgery for 24hours for a cycling charity. 1
Al OPecia 10.09.13 10:13pm
One way Mars trip miscalculation as they have to start from Mars

200,000 people who have applied for the one way trip to Mars have reacted with anger to the revelation that they'll have to make their own way to the Red planet before being flown back to Earth. One...

apepper 10.09.13 8:31pm
iPhone to release Bakelite version for retro market

Hat tip to Dumbnews...

Coco 10.09.13 8:30pm
iPhone owners angry they have to buy another iPhone 0
Dumbnews 10.09.13 8:08pm
iPhone 5 promises voice quality comparable to the 1950's 1
Dumbnews 10.09.13 8:05pm
Alsatians to replace corgis as royal dogs 0
Coco 10.09.13 7:55pm
Daisy (number 666) sues farmer for harassment by jackals 0
sillybugger 10.09.13 7:49pm
Satanism in decline as number of the beast revealed to be 09 premium line 0
sillybugger 10.09.13 7:43pm
Bob Geldof to save Africa while in space

Often ignored and unfairly represented by the western media, the continent of Africa has always relied on the front man for The Boomtown Rats to champion their cause. A spokesman for UNICEF declared:...

Wrenfoe 10.09.13 7:36pm
ITV To Investigate Claims of Non-Paedophile on TV

Michael Le Vell's career lies in tatters today, after he was convicted of working as a TV celebrity for decades without serving his apprenticeship. A court found him guilty on several counts of...

deceangli 10.09.13 6:09pm
Submitting on-line expenses now takes longer than incurring them

Company accounts departments across the country are praising the latest developments in slow, complicated, counter-intuitive on-line expenses systems. The new version of ‘Tally’ for example, is...

Midfield Diamond 10.09.13 5:38pm
Midfield Diamond
Testicles live in a blame culture

Researchers at Emory University, US, have discovered that the majority of world’s woes are caused by ‘testicular gigantum’ or ‘big bollock syndrome’ as it is more commonly known. Many...

Wrenfoe 10.09.13 5:11pm
Tian Tian, Assad and Putin continue taking the piss 1
roybland 10.09.13 4:58pm
Michael Le Vell cleared all charges of being able to act...

Sally said to be delighted...

irreverendJ 10.09.13 3:59pm
NASA Astronaut training programme to be replaced with YouTube videos 0
Dumbnews 10.09.13 3:52pm
French garage mechanic jubilant at Le Vell acquittal

'It's a great day for all French garage mechanics,' said overalled French garage mechanic Jean-Paul Badiou from the forecourt of Dave's Cars, Bolton, clutching an oil-can and a glass of celebratory...

roybland 10.09.13 3:45pm
Shock as online Satire site is taken down by humourless contributions....

Admins declare "it's no joke" Am I on the right wavelength?...

Mr Humphries 10.09.13 3:44pm
Syria puts its entire Chemical Weapon Stockpile on EBay

In a bold peace move today it is believed that Syria has put its entire chemical stockpile EBay. A look on the auction website shows Sarin, Anthrax and Mustard gases available from a seller known as...

Scronnyglonkle 10.09.13 3:25pm
Not Amused
Le Vell gives oral to jury members, and get's off on it

The teddy bear was not available for comment today as Mr Le Vell was aquitted on all counts of sexual assault at Manchester Crown Court, albeit silent he orally thanked the jury and then made a quick...

Vanburger 10.09.13 3:21pm