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Government outraged at duty avoidance on Nitrogen cocktails

The government have promised to act to end the dangerous craze of mixing cocktails with liquid nitrogen. A Tory spokesperson explained, "Its bad enough that an eighteen year old from Lancaster has...

3
grottymonty 09.10.12 2:47pm
Cinders
Nigella Lawson Mafia link exposed

Nigella Lawson was reported to be in hiding last night following the discovery of documents linking her to the infamous Mafia don, Beltrano Balisteri, known to the Italian underworld as ‘The...

0
Dick Everyman 09.10.12 2:38pm
Dick Everyman
Toilet doors slammed by advertising watchdog

The Advertising Standards Authority promised to "come down hard" on false claims posted on public toilet cubicle walls and doors, as a recent probe revealed that up to 80% of the toilet ads failed to...

6
The Bogs 09.10.12 2:24pm
Gerontius
Billions suffering from slow, expensive and unreliable Internet, says UN 0
Dumbnews 09.10.12 2:15pm
Dumbnews
Laser scanning reveals Stonehenge to be ancient art gallery.

Laser scanning has revealed 72 carvings, invisible to the eye, on 5 of the stones at Stoenhenge., The news has 'rocked' the art worldD'arcy Bussle says 'yah' a lot while a Russian is en route with a...

1
philthefunk 09.10.12 2:06pm
Gerontius
Daily Mail crossword solution

YESTERDAY’S SOLUTION (No 7112): ACROSS: 1 Somali. 2 Our jobs. 5 Cervical. 9 Syndrome. 12 Turkish. 14 Grantham. 16 Paris 17. Mercedes. 18 Morecambe Bay. 20 Austria. 24 Dennis. DOWN: 1 Nigella. 2...

7
antharrison 09.10.12 1:42pm
antharrison
Homeowners’ Burglary Guide released as ‘Fifty Shades of Grayling’. 0
malgor 09.10.12 12:45pm
malgor
Women who claim Savile abuse could be stripped of their Jim'll Fix It badges. 0
MADJEZ 09.10.12 12:32pm
MADJEZ
Betting closes on this year's Guantanamo Bay pantomine naming decision 0
antharrison 09.10.12 12:12pm
antharrison
"I Believe the Earth was created in 6 days" says bonkers US Congressman

Paul Broun, a Christian fundamentalist and somehow Congressman for science and technology, believes that evolution and dinosaurs are a load of made up twaddle., "The Earth is relatively new which is...

0
philthefunk 09.10.12 12:06pm
philthefunk
Savile "Queen touched me here and here during knighthood ceremony" 0
Underconstruction 09.10.12 12:04pm
Underconstruction
Austrian skydiver in ground-breaking record attempt 0
Sinnick 09.10.12 11:38am
Sinnick
Animal Rights activists can be "retained and used" under new Tory proposals

David Cameron has outlined plans to allow homeowners to escape conviction when confronting burglars. These guidelines will also extend to laboratories where animal testing takes place. In his...

0
grottymonty 09.10.12 10:01am
grottymonty
BBC News displays images of women sexually abused by Jimmy Savile

The BBC showed pictures from the Seventies of the women, when the attacks took place, and of them today, under the caption, Now, Then, Now, Then , Now, Then...

3
philthefunk 09.10.12 9:51am
weematt
Osborne considering taking UK out of metric system

Though undisclosed at the Tory party conference it is understood that George Osborne been working on a plan to take the UK out of the metric system., A source close to the chancellor said that...

0
weematt 09.10.12 9:49am
weematt
BBC sexual abusers far more professional according to victim poll

Victims of ITV celebrities claiming that the left hand didn't seem to know what the right hand was doing...

0
Underconstruction 09.10.12 9:24am
Underconstruction
Westminster Council renames Saville Row, 'DLT Lane' and hopes for the best

More embarrassing name changes soon?...

0
Skylarking 09.10.12 8:36am
Skylarking
Boiglars "we can soften them up a bit for you" say mafiosi

Vincente & Carmine Tagliatelli Home Protection Services (UK) now offering special rates, References available...

0
vertical 09.10.12 8:19am
vertical
Lactose Intolerance could provide miracle cure for Zumba

The Zumba epidemic has engulfed the free time and sanity of many women in the 25-40 year age group. Wild eyed mums have been lurching between social peers spreading the debilitating affliction with...

0
Newsquelch 09.10.12 7:57am
Newsquelch
Tory Conference fears grow as Pope's teeth drop out

An emergency dental unit has been hurriedly set up, 'as a precaution', at the Conservative Party conference in Birmingham, after the Pope became the latest victim of what has been dubbed 'Hampstead...

3
pinxit 09.10.12 7:30am
pinxit
Paedo casino banker was also a Radio 1 DJ - shock 0
ronseal 09.10.12 6:18am
ronseal
Tories launch new initiative: ‘Shoot a burglar, win an iPad’... 0
Tripod 09.10.12 5:38am
Tripod
Osborne announces a return to pounds shillings and pence.

The Chancellor of the Exchequer today announced that the country would return to imperial currency immediately. He said "I got the idea when I was chatting to my dad who was reminiscing about the...

0
Maverick 09.10.12 4:30am
Maverick
Osborne ratchets up cure for UK economic woes: "More & bigger leeches" 0
dvo4fun 08.10.12 10:43pm
dvo4fun
Nascar race ruined by moment of excitement

American sports fans are outraged as a routine, oval-format Nascar race was interrupted on the 187th identical lap, when several cars crashed spectacularly...

0
gaijintendo 08.10.12 9:14pm
gaijintendo
Judge suspended from murder trial after Swedish Chef impersonation

The trial of a Belfast man accused of raping and then shooting dead an American tourist in the city last December has been sensationally adjourned pending an investigation into the behaviour of the...

5
jamsieoconnor 08.10.12 9:06pm
FlashArry
Abu Hamza fails airport retina and fingerprint scanner security

http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/63089000/jpg/_63089255_gku0l3lu.jpg more soon...

4
custard cream 08.10.12 9:03pm
FlashArry
Tracey Emin’s unmade bed vandalised. Nobody notices... 0
Tripod 08.10.12 6:29pm
Tripod
Pre-conference bender leaves Osborne with ‘spider’s web’ face tattoo

A regrettable night on the razz has left Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne sporting a massive spider’s web tattoo on his face, just a day before he presents the country’s headline...

12
DustyBinLaden 08.10.12 6:19pm
custard cream
Elderly couple grow pot plant

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-beds-bucks-herts-19868327...

0
Sinnick 08.10.12 6:07pm
Sinnick