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Scientists uncertain if Nobel Prize for Physics actually awarded

Debate has erupted in scientific circles following the awarding of the Nobel Prize to particle physics pioneers Peter Higgs and Francois Englert. Celebrations were short-lived, as quantum physicists...

Dan Beige 09.10.13 10:08pm
Dan Beige
Al-qaeda discuss evasion techniques with Somerset badgers 0
FlashArry 09.10.13 9:39pm
Wilshire backs EDL training sessions to find improved back four

More soon I am sure there's a JT joke there somewhere...

Not Amused 09.10.13 8:46pm
Not Amused
Uk police chief solves case of his own mugging in just one hour

Proof today, as if it were needed, that the UK has the best law enforcement there is. Celebrated Birmingham police chief Bertie Plump reportedly managed to deduce that he had been mugged just one...

TobiasBV 09.10.13 8:20pm
"Everyone's facebook posts are annoying", says every facebook user 0
Dumbnews 09.10.13 7:35pm
BBC Minus 1 to show programmes “a day before they are finished”

BBC have announced its new “Minus 1” service - a new channel that shows programmes up to a day before they have been completed. "This shows the BBC's commitment to be ahead of the game,"...

nickb 09.10.13 6:58pm
Badgers' leader to give exclusive interview to BBC.. 0
Boutros 09.10.13 6:38pm
Carr: "It's Taken Me Months To Perfect My Fake Laugh"

no more, please...

Mike Turbine-Hamilton 09.10.13 6:29pm
Mike Turbine-Hamilton
Innovative vegetable grower wins novel peas prize 2
Smart Alex 09.10.13 6:24pm
MI5 Chief makes speech from undisclosed lavatory

The head of MI5, Mr Andrew McSmythe, made an impassioned speech from an unspecified lavatory, yesterday. His words echoed the Home Secretary’s in their defence of state secrets. And they also...

nickb 09.10.13 5:18pm
Russians 'Find' drugs on Greenpeace Ship

Russian investigators have reported finding hard drugs on board the Greenpeace ship seized last month during a protest in the Arctic. They also claimed to have found thousands of tons of soft drugs,...

Flugelbinder 09.10.13 3:37pm
Help to buy scheme extended to season tickets - bringing public transport to all

The government - being always quick to catch on to a vote-winner - is extending it's popular 'help to buy' scheme to those planning to buy an annual season ticket, meaning that potential 'first-time...

NewBiscuit 09.10.13 3:35pm
Wilshere positions himself for EDL top job

Having been marginalized by Arsene Wenger, since an influx of ‘one migrant German called Ozil’, Jack Wilshere has decided to declare his candidacy for the vacant leadership of the English Defence...

Wrenfoe 09.10.13 3:23pm
Jesus H
L'oreal funereal service - 'They were worth it' 0
JimHenson 09.10.13 3:00pm
Christmas To Be Moved To Summer To Avoid Clashing With Football

Also to improve safety for elderly nocturnal sleigh-drivers, with less snow on roofs. However one S Claus [an Eastern-European immigrant worker if ever there was one] has whinged that safety will...

Titus 09.10.13 2:54pm
Jesse Bigg
Channel 4 to broadcast Jellyfish Mating, "Box Sex" 0
james_doc 09.10.13 2:42pm
Richard II's Death, New Evidence

New historical evidence re Richard II's death in Pontefract Castle, Yorkshire, now proves beyond doubt that he died of a combination of early cricketing and Pontefract Cakes. Hence the runs...

Jesse Bigg 09.10.13 2:35pm
Jesse Bigg
Badgers accused of 'Not Playing Fair'

Environment secretary Owen Paterson has defended extending the pilot Badger cull, complaining that whilst the Badgers initially played their part in the exercise, dutifully meandering around their...

Flugelbinder 09.10.13 1:41pm
'We want more sex programmes' say nation's household pets

Domesticated animals across the country claim they are being severely under represented in post watershed terrestrial programming and have demanded that there be more adult-themed entertainment aimed...

Robopop 09.10.13 1:29pm
Nobel Prize for Medicine Awarded to Bristol Grandmother

Stockholm 9th October – The Nobel Prize committee have announced that this year’s prize for Medicine has been awarded to Bristol resident Edna Sharples. The newest laureate was awarded this...

james_doc 09.10.13 1:00pm
Brave penectomy patient awarded "No Bellpiece Prize" 0
Sinnick 09.10.13 12:13pm
Outrage as Lib Dem PMs to write off suicide tools under expenses

The Daily Mail has been up in arms this week after several Lib Dem members have admitted to writing off the various tools needed for their impending suicides under MPs expenses. The Mail says it’s...

JimHenson 09.10.13 11:56am
"Clear browsing history" to be made 11th Commandment

God has announced He can no longer stand idly by and watch the devastation caused by careless men who walk away from their PCs leaving their wives to gape in horror at the list of sites they've been...

sydalg 09.10.13 11:52am
Silent church wins No-bell Prize 0
sydalg 09.10.13 11:40am
EDL leader quits amid fears Simon and Garfunkel have designs on his wife 0
sydalg 09.10.13 11:36am
12 year old from Hackney has mid-life crisis

Benji Hanwell, a 12 year old from Hackney, has had a mid-life crisis. Mates say the change happened suddenly, the moment Benji noticed he was starting to grow a beard. Since, they claim, Hanwell has...

TobiasBV 09.10.13 11:25am
Tock is cheap, says discount watchmaker 0
sydalg 09.10.13 11:22am
Queen 'too frail' to carry Commonwealth Games baton across 70 countries 0
custard cream 09.10.13 10:37am
custard cream
Cowell to Launch 'The Hunger Factor'

Following the downward slope of the X-Factor, with ratings dropping quicker than Cowell's label Syco can shed former contestants, the music mogul has come up with a new idea after watching movie 'The...

Flugelbinder 09.10.13 10:37am
'Shifty-looking' workmen lay perfect tarmac driveway for pensioner

A gang of workmen of a 'shifty' appearance have laid a perfect tarmac driveway for a Sheffield pensioner. 'My suspicions were aroused as they were shifty-looking, dressed suspiciously like workmen...

roybland 09.10.13 10:31am