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Gerontius 3 years

The ticker was rubbish so it was taken away., Apolgies to English language for any offence...

MI5 just Woken Up to Fact Defence Committee MP Assistant is a Russian 0
Dun Dunkin 3 years

' I can tell you we were spooked . Goodness knows what trojan, spyware, password crackers and self destruct stuff he's spread around government' BBC Drama Spooks returns in the Spring...

Pop star, Haddaway, finds answer to "What is Love" on Google 2
Dumbnews 3 years
MP also says she is merely 'young'. 0
Ostsee 3 years
MP denies that beautiful, young Russian spy is an 'assistant'. 0
Ostsee 3 years
Mince pies 'Homophobic' claim gay activists. 27
surdoux 3 years

In a press release today, gay activists were adamant that mince pies were an affront to our sexuality 'These pies blatently discrimate aginst all gay people, and should be removed from the shelves...

Students pledge to vote LibDem when they qualify 1
Sinnick 3 years
Government crackdown on illegal down loads... 0
Dexter 3 years

'in future, feather smugglers will have their lorries impounded', said a Home Office spokesman...

Middle finger length determines severity of 'Up yours' gesture 0
antharrison 3 years

Scientists have discovered that people with particularly long middle fingers are capable of increasing the severity of the traditional gesture of 'Up yours' to 'Fuck you, you lying twat'. The...

Bill Hart diagnosed with Bilharzia 11
riesler 3 years

more appropriate ailments soon?...

Facebook users leave profile unchanged to show solidarity with all causes 2
Dumbnews 3 years
Disgruntled engineer launches WikiFlaws 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Creator of Dilbert, Scott Adams, launches WikiBS 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Estate agent contemplates new career as Lib Dem MP 0
thesheriff 3 years

After years of busking it in residential sales, estate agent Jimmy Gates has decided to re-train as a Liberal Democrat MP. Jimmy explained that business has been slow in the residential property...

China defriended Google after it started hanging with "that slag Taiwan" 0
thesheriff 3 years

China was like way cool with Google and they used to hang out and shit and do lots of shit together but then, like, Google said it didn't like hanging with China and doing shit because it was like...

X-Factor shock as Cheryl Cole fails to 'ABSOLUTELY LOVV' a performance. 0
MADJEZ 3 years

She promises she will 'ABSOLUTElY LOVV Yoow' soon...

Spanish strikers blamed for planes being grounded by ice and snow in UK 0
Mr.3374 3 years
Viewers take to streets after 'I'm a Celebrity' winner u-turns on tuition fees. 0
SingingHinny 3 years
After fires ravage Israel some fear that their special relationship with God is 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
Iranian artist has camera installed up his botty has trouble with shutter speed 1
Malcum eggs 3 years
Call to end Nanny State Mobile Phone Rules. 0
BillyBitzer 3 years

In the wake of the relaxation of working hours regulations for HGV drivers because ”It’s snowing a bit”, an industry spokesman today called of the lifting of “prohibitive rules” regarding...

Leon Jackson to advise Julian Assange on how to go unnoticed. 0
petebrown 3 years

@petebnewsagency...

Support for Spanish air traffic strike fades when flying pickets grounded 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years
FA donation to 3rd world aid consists mostly of sour grapes 0
Trini 3 years
Draconia - a brief guide for visitors 3
sector29 3 years

We often hear the word “Draconian” - normally in relation to rules or laws or budget cuts. But where is Draconia? And how would it be for a holiday destination ? Do the trains run on time ?...

Pensioner wrecks satellitte during marathon phone query with Indian call centre. 10
Basil_B 3 years

Woking pensioner John Woodward was responsible today for causing a telephone signal satellite to break down thanks to a three hour conversation between him and a Mumbai call centre representative...

"Let’s not forget the true meaning of Christmas: the birth of Santa Clause"... 3
Doylem 3 years
Isle of Wight in retrospective bid for 1948 Olympics... 0
Doylem 3 years

“The infrastructure’s already in place”, says spokesman. “We’re quietly confident”...

Revised first-year syllabus at Hamburger University: ‘bun, burger, bun’... 0
Doylem 3 years
"Can we come down yet? Hola?" Spanish pilots await clearance from strikers. 1
allmyownstunts 3 years