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Gareth Malone to form Taliban Choir

In an attempt to end over 30 years of violence and war in Aghanistan, the perkily posh, quirky choir master, Malone, 37, has reportedly made initial contact with Taliban commanders in Helmand...

4
Don1 01.10.12 12:18pm
custard cream
Litter bin confounds Aberdeen man

Firefighters were called out to rescue a man whose head was stuck in a public litter bin in Justice Street, Aberdeen. Emergency services were alerted on Sunday evening by a passer by who noticed a...

0
custard cream 01.10.12 12:16pm
custard cream
Dear Mr John O Farrel,

Id just like to say thanks for the special limited edition Newsbiscuit Bible you sent me,its fantastic,your fantastic to I have all your recoards.Ive read all the Old Testament like you...

17
Jackaline Hyde 01.10.12 12:07pm
Sinnick
Run away girl complains about teacher's paperwork burden

Megan Stammers, the teenage girl who ran away with her Maths teacher, has admitted that life with the 30 year old hadn’t proved to be quite as she had imagined. ‘I thought it was gonna be dead...

9
Stan 01.10.12 12:04pm
Dickens or Shakespeare
Weightlifter with OCD struggles to complete clean and jerk 1
LittleSpender 01.10.12 11:44am
Ironduke
“He died doing what he loved best”, says climber’s dad, “flying into a mountain” 6
Tripod 01.10.12 11:28am
butagirl
Police probe Sussex girls snatch ....

can't believe I've got to this first - thanks Phoenix nights ....

1
misterjingles 01.10.12 10:25am
burnmybridges
I Was A 13 Year Old Virgin - Jim Fixed That Though

tut - have 5...

1
01.10.12 10:14am
burnmybridges
Jimmy Savilles coffin to be raised to 90 degrees and to face Scarborough Crown 0
burnmybridges 01.10.12 10:03am
burnmybridges
Esther Ranzten regrets not fingering Jimmy Saville.

Hows that then...

5
burnmybridges 01.10.12 9:11am
burnmybridges
Shouts of U S Ohhhhhhh, heard from Medinah 0
simonjmr 01.10.12 8:56am
simonjmr
Pope’s ex-butler pleads ‘lock me up’ after Vatican threatens ‘almighty kicking’

Former papal butler Paolo Gabriele has broken down in an Italian court and begged to be locked up, after receiving threats from the Vatican to “make that scene from Reservoir Dogs look like Harvest...

7
DustyBinLaden 01.10.12 8:54am
Sinnick
Donald Trump’s comb-over hunted to extinction... 0
Tripod 01.10.12 7:40am
Tripod
Ryanair charging extra “for getting on plane”... 3
Tripod 01.10.12 7:05am
dvo4fun
Maths teacher tries to prove that 30 into 15 will go after Geography secondment. 0
fernandomando 30.09.12 11:13pm
fernandomando
Dear Jim, could you fix my hymen.

More allegations against dead stars later...

0
MADJEZ 30.09.12 9:56pm
MADJEZ
Missing Schoolgirl seeks anonymity

Megan Stammers today announced that she'd applied to change her surname by deed poll. Although on reflection she said that swapping "Stammers" for "Swallows" could be perceived as a retrograde step...

0
misterjingles 30.09.12 8:29pm
misterjingles
Greenland to host Winter Olympics

The International Olympic Committee (IOC) today announced that Greenland has been successful in securing the 2020 Winter Olympics. Jacqes Rogge, the president of the IOC said ‘Greenland has...

0
Alfred Noakes 30.09.12 8:13pm
Alfred Noakes
Katie Price and Robert Downey Jr's love child makes it to X-Factor live show 0
30.09.12 7:59pm
Clegg: coalition is ‘a worthwhile exercise’

In an exclusive frank interview given to both Andrew Marr and Dermot Murnaghan about the virtues of marriage, Nick Clegg said the Tory-LibDem marriage is a worthwhile exercise because it proves...

0
Reg Herring 30.09.12 6:52pm
Reg Herring
George Michael cancels Australian tour dates for fear of going down under 0
Queen of Tarts 30.09.12 5:34pm
Queen of Tarts
Esther Ranzten says her husband would be shocked that she hadn`t mentioned his

name in the last 5 minutes...

0
burnmybridges 30.09.12 4:00pm
burnmybridges
Maths teacher admits: "Thirty into fifteen doesn't go after all" 1
AReader 30.09.12 3:44pm
burnmybridges
Childhood victim,now Harrogate councillor says Jim fingered it for me

Goodness Gracious...

0
burnmybridges 30.09.12 3:43pm
burnmybridges
Mars images 'show old streambed'

http://fmward.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/canal6622.jpg...

4
virtuallywill 30.09.12 2:42pm
virtuallywill
Sneezy, Sleepy, Dopey, Doc, Happy, Bashful and Grumpy all make the short list 1
Ian Searle 30.09.12 1:58pm
Ironduke
Pepper Pot Invasion

Great Britain has been declared in a state of Terror Alert Magenta. Dr Peter Corn speaks of the psychology of the conspiring, confabulating Common Lesser Spotted pepper pot. Undercover footage from...

1
FeelTheatre 30.09.12 12:21pm
Squudge
Matthew Corbett follows Rowling into adult market with Sooty, Sue and Sweep Too 6
DustyBinLaden 30.09.12 10:49am
Perks
Spud U Like team up with The North Face for a more expensive jacket potato

The high street take-away potato filler ‘Spud U Like’ has announced it is to go into partnership with ‘The North Face’ to offer it’s customers ‘a more expensive jacket potato‘. The new...

14
Perks 30.09.12 9:08am
button
Corporate executives welcome news that liking football no longer compulsory

Fashion followers were cock a hoop last night as it emerged that football has finally gone 'off trend'. A new report by the much respected Association of Corporate Yesmen that says football has been...

0
ronseal 30.09.12 7:52am
ronseal