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3 dead and 25 injured in bandwagon collapse 9
Immunis 3 years

There were scenes of chaos in the Houses of Parliament today as the bankers bonuses bandwagon finally collapsed under the weight of political outrage. The emergency services are still searching for...

Whitney Would Enjoy Seeing Her Deathbed on TV 0
Hooch 3 years

The singer and actress Whitney Houston died on Sunday night leaving behind a great feeling of sadness within her many fans. Her death has also sparked fury as images of the bath in which she drew he...

Government announce 'Commercialism Day' as a new way to waste your money 1
Perks 3 years

Following on from the financial success of Christmas and Valentines day recently, the Government are expected to release details of a new celebration on 1st July. ‘Commercialism Day’ will start...

Gravy Train to carry custard, says Network Rail 0
nickb 3 years
Old Firm Goes Bankrupt 0
Mathna 3 years
"Flowers would have been nice", sniffs Abu Qatada 3
cinquecento 3 years

While enjoying his release from prison and the opportunity to catch up on the daytime television shopping channels, Abu Qatada has revealed his sense of disappointment in affairs of the heart. "I'm...

The seemingly endless Carlos Tevez saga took a bizarre turn today .. 0
Gourd Almighty 3 years

.. as he arrived in Manchester to be told he'd been transferred to Glasgow Rangers. Roberto Mancini said, "I believe he can do a job for Rangers that he couldn't manage here at Manchester City."...

Middle-Earth in crisis as Rangers go bust 0
apepper 3 years

One for LOTR fans!...

Man still bitter about £1.75 he spent on Valentine card 0
roybland 3 years

Nineteen-year-old Poundland checkout worker Jake Doyle says he is still bitter about the Valentine card he sent to a colleague he fancied. 'I guess I should have got over it by now,' he says, 'but I...

Watchdog criticizes GayDay loans for causing spiral into male prostitution. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
Cameron Vows "If French Attack The Argies First....." 1
Jesse Bigg 3 years

."We'll be right behind them as usual."...

6music celebrates 10th year by handing original listeners over to Radio 2 11
3 years

As 6music celebrated its tenth year of appealing to 31-33 year-olds who pretend to enjoy obscure music released between 1993 and 1995, listeners over the age of 40 are being forceably bundled into...

Coldplay still the strongest sedative available without prescription. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
Beverley Hilton dead from Press overdose 0
Son of Barnabas 3 years

Eighties legend Beverley Hilton was found dead in Los Angeles today. She had been overcome by a massive wave of Press hysteria and intrusive speculation. Complete strangers were seen rummaging in...

Apache pilot and gunner, Prince Harry, disobeys order to fire at Will 2
Smart Alex 3 years
Safety officer’s head explodes after Brian Cox attends ‘Speed Awareness’ course 8
3 years

The organiser of a speed awareness course in Cheshire has been confounded to death by physicist Brian Cox. Professor Cox decided to attend the course rather than collect three points on his driving...

Tributes pour in for homeless drug addict 10
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

People from all walks of life have been paying tribute today to Jake Riley, a homeless heroin addict who died at the weekend aged just 34. Often seen huddled in shop doorways around Leicester city...

Equivocal Valentine’s cards for unfulfilling relationships 12
Long Distance Clara 3 years

Clinton Cards launches range of equivocal Valentine’s cards for unfulfilling relationships Following complaints from customers who find themselves in relationships lacking the life-long commitment...

BMWs replace handcart as preferred mode of transport, says latest Sinners' Poll 0
pinxit 3 years
BBC unveils its latest 'maverick judge with a difference' drama - Strasbourg 0
ronseal 3 years

The BBC has unveiled its latest drama series about an unconventional lawmaker who acts on hunches and does things his own way. 'Strasbourg' follows the adventures of Jurgen Strasbourg, a judge with a...

South Atlantic tensions "back from brink" as Argentina returns Tevez 0
grottymonty 3 years

With news that Carlos Tevez is back in Manchester today the world issued a collective sigh of relief. The British army has been stood down to an amber footing as the threat of all out war recedes. ...

Tevez Complains: No Trees at Eastlands 0
HenryMJUK 3 years

When challenged Tevez said: Woof, woof woof, woof, woof woof woof snarl ....

Omnipotent deities need more protection in UK, urges Baroness Warsi 0
cinquecento 3 years
Radio 4 announcers admit to sneaky late-night waltzes to ‘Sailing By’ 7
Clarky 3 years

Late-night Radio 4 announcers and studio staff often take their partners for a slow waltz to the lilting strings of ‘Sailing By’, the music played before the late-night shipping forecast, it has...

Find true love with genuine meat marquee and dry meat confidence 15
youbuyitnow 3 years

Do you crave it like I do? I honk for it, sadly. But now I honk not, thanks to [url=]genuine meat marquee with the confidence of dry meat[/url]....

Kneejerk move to ban cliches from headlines comes under fire 1
Nick McCarr 3 years
Argentina to extend naval boycott to Duran Duran’s ‘Rio’ yacht 0
Gary Stanton 3 years

Argentina's transport workers' union says it will extend its recent naval boycott to Duran Duran’s private yacht as used in the iconic video for the band’s 1983 hit single Rio. The union -...

Typical. A man has a baby and we're supposed to be impressed writes India Knight 0
ronseal 3 years
Cameron seeks Dalglish advice on apologising for obnoxious millionaires 2
Midfield Diamond 3 years

David Cameron is set to meet Liverpool manager Kenny Dalglish later this month to discuss methods for dealing with rich but repugnant characters who tarnish the good name of the profession they...

Huge Increase in 3rd rate Whitney Houston jokes causes World Wide Web to crash 0
Mathna 3 years