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Global consortium wondering how best to fuck up the Moon

With the global economy still in the doldrums, the CEO of a faceless international company is turning his gaze skywards and wondering how best they might fuck up the moon. For decades, the technology...

07.12.12 10:39pm
Ke$ha: Sorry I thought you said "Goat"

Ba boom tsch! Old joke. (Who is Ke$ha?)...

beau-jolly 07.12.12 9:10pm
Midfield Diamond
Treasury fears Global brands might leave UK & start not paying tax elsewhere 1
dvo4fun 07.12.12 8:50pm
custard cream
Pippa Middleton & Ricky Tomlinson co-write series of ‘My Arse’ books... 1
Tripod 07.12.12 8:48pm
custard cream
"Snowman" accused of child abduction case going back 25 years 0
brd888 07.12.12 8:01pm
Researchers find anger management classes 'all the rage.' 2
custard cream 07.12.12 7:30pm
Isle of Wight Starbucks claims offshore tax haven status

"Yeah, like it's INLAND bloody Revenue innit?", Isle of Wight Starbucks manager Wayne Scoggins said yesterday, "INLAND! They shouldn't be able to touch us just off the Hampshire coast"...

Smart Alex 07.12.12 5:39pm
Sports Presenter Clare Balding honoured in WTF awards 4
custard cream 07.12.12 5:15pm
custard cream
Homeless Totness man died looking for a Costa Coffee outlet 1
custard cream 07.12.12 3:35pm
World Cup 2030 Finals to be held in every country in the world

In the wake of UEFA's controversial proposal that the 2020 European Championship Finals could be staged in a number of countries throughout Europe, FIFA have now announced that the 2030 World Cup...

jamsieoconnor 07.12.12 3:21pm
Sex probe police to posthumously arrest Robert Maxwell.

Metropolitan police today announced they have issued a warrant for the arrest of Robert Maxwell in connection with sexual abuse allegations. Police from Operation Yewtree decided to look into...

Gaz 07.12.12 2:42pm
Osbourne admits closed curtains during the day down to internet porn. 1
MADJEZ 07.12.12 1:37pm
terence mcflurry
Hard working cannabis growers hit out at Osbourne's closed curtains stereotype. 0
MADJEZ 07.12.12 1:07pm
The Hamiltons agree to represent Max Clifford 1
Scronnyglonkle 07.12.12 1:04pm
Isle of Wight to be made 'Retirement Island' for ageing male showbiz stars. 1
Gaz 07.12.12 11:45am
Max Clifford gives Metropolitan Police exclusive interview rights

In a major public relations coup, Max Clifford has exclusively awarded the rights to a detailed interview on his sexual history to the Metropolitan Police Service. ‘As I’m sure everyone...

Long Distance Clara 07.12.12 10:45am
‘Inspired by Starbucks’ self-employed UK builder goes Fair trade

An off-the-books builder from Aylesbury has decided to contribute to the country where he earns his living. “I’ve always paid my whack mind.” said Jim Furnace “Other than alcohol and tobacco...

dvo4fun 07.12.12 10:23am
Osborne: “Buddhism the only way to save economy now”

Chancellor George Osborne has decreed that almost everyone in the UK must adopt a Buddhist monastic lifestyle for the next four years at least, in order to rescue the country from its economic crisis...

thumper 07.12.12 9:52am
McAfee advised to take anti-virus protection before Guatemalan prison stay

Hopefully no more soon...

johnnydobbo 07.12.12 9:08am
70s entertainers plan Xmas reunion at Ecuadorian embassy 0
Yikes 07.12.12 7:16am
Celebrity Its a Cockout to go up against Queen at Xmas 1
Drylaw 07.12.12 6:36am
McAfee quarantined in Guatamala, after entering illegally as trojan horse

Guatamala advised to update their firewall...

Gary Baldy 06.12.12 11:05pm
Gary Baldy
ITV reveal cast of "I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Jail" every day this week

Stuart Hall is excused after playing his joker...

Gary Baldy 06.12.12 10:59pm
Gary Baldy
Andrew Mitchell - investigation finds he was referring to shale gas 0
custard cream 06.12.12 10:01pm
custard cream
Professor Snape to treat Kate for "hyperemesis gravidarum".

With Mr. Potter, in the vomitorium...

Maverick 06.12.12 9:46pm
Exxon sponsors rally to lower awareness of climate change. 0
Maverick 06.12.12 9:40pm
Chancellor's Autumn statement "All the leaves are brown & the sky is grey" 5
Scronnyglonkle 06.12.12 7:38pm
Comedy change scientists say winter ‘global warming’ jokes at historical high

Researchers at the Frank Spencer Institute of Comedy Studies have released a study showing that jokes about global warming during bouts of freezing cold and rainy weather have reached dangerous...

Yikes 06.12.12 7:32pm
Al OPecia
Facebook announce 25th December as last posting day for Christmas 1
simonjmr 06.12.12 7:28pm
Santa to challenge decision to award present franchise to Easter Bunny

Bearded franchise-holder Father Christmas today strongly criticised the Government's decision to award the West Coast Christmas Eve present-delivery franchise to his rival, the Easter Bunny. 'I...

ianslat 06.12.12 7:27pm